I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2007

09

Nov

I am – Leelee Sobieski is a Clown of the Day

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I saw these pictures and wasn’t going to bother posting them, because they are dull as shit, but the joke in them is that she’s at a Cirque du Soleil event dressed like a fucking circus performer, but not the kind you’d actually see at Cirque du Soleil doing their crazy acrobatic dances that you find absolutely breathtaking because you’re a homo, or the kind you’d find in some freakshow, even though she’s tall as fuck, but because her hipster lesbian shoes look a lot like something her Polish grandmother probably wore in the 30′s where she picked up juggling and joined a traveling carnival. The same juggling skills she used to impress the the Nazis so they wouldn’t kill her, allowing her to come to America allowing Leelee to have such a prosperous career or some shit.

But I am just guessing here….me and Leelee aren’t as tight as her obnoxious tights, so I don’t know the real story, but I do know she’s got stupid fuckin’ shoes and that’s all that matters to me while dying on my computer today, even though I think I may still be drunk…and I love being drunk…

Related Posts:

Leelee Sobieski Tits at an Event
Leelee Sobieski Boring Halloween
Leelee Sobieski PVC
Leelee Sobieski Cleavage

Posted in:Clown|Leelee Sobieski|Legs|Tall|Unsorted

2007

09

Nov

I am – Lindsay Lohan’s Nipple of the Day

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I got these pics off some virgin’s site who thinks there’s nipple in them, but I don’t see nipple, maybe you have to have some virgin super desperation “computer eye” to see her nipple, kinda like a homeless man who thinks he finds a thanksgiving feasts in the dumpster when shit’s just garbage or a how a drunk horny motherfucker thinks the bitch he’s talking to is worth fucking when she’s really got testicles or maybe how everyone on welfare goes to the casino on welfare check day in hopes of winning big but instead end up broker than when they walked in ….if you know what I mean, which you probably don’t because you’re already jerking off to these because you think you see nipple.

In reality, I am more concerned with her legs being wrapped in Christmas Wrapping paper, shit makes me want to unwrap her with my penis but that’s just an old Martinez family tradition….At least I know I’d be getting her herpes, because I hear it’s the gift that keeps on giving, which is a lot better than the can of creamed corn my wife got me last year, when I clearly asked her for a divorce and a couple younger hotter girls to replace her.

But that’s not the point, I am fucking hungover, I think I drank enough to kill a cow, too bad I didn’t bring my out wife with me….get it…cuz she’s fat…and I hate her, yeah this is what happens when I’m licking my vodka smelling sweat in hopes of making this alcohol withdrawal less shaky.


Related Posts:

Lohan’s Got Hot Tits
Lohan Touching Her Toes
Lohan Parties Like a Lesbian in Japan
Lohan’s Tit in a Bra

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Nipples|Unsorted

2007

09

Nov

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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It’s finally happened. I have fallen in love with one of my readers, that header picture isn’t of her. The only problem is that her email has the word tranny in it, but she is hot, 18 and from Poland. She’s a virgin an told me she wants to have my baby. I don’t know if trannies can have my baby, but I am willing to try because she looks so good that even if she was a tranny, I could look past that. I keep having visions of me living in a shit whole in eastern Europe, rockin’ a wife beater and listening polka music, eating potatoes, while she does my laundry in the sink and we talk about how the war has changed us….

Either way, my site and my computer have Aids. I haven’t figured out who gave it to who, but I can only blame Magic Johnson.

Here are my links:

O Face or Dancing With the Stars Face?
GO

Amanda puts her legs behind her head…Because she can!
GO

Watch the New Kim Kardashian Trailer then Buy the Movie with 1 Hour More Footage of Her Getting Fucked
GO

Some Dude Cums From a Lap Dance Video
GO

Kate Moss in a See Through Dress
GO

Britney Buys a Benz in a See Through Shirt
GO

Dog the Bounty Hunter’s New Job
GO

Miranda here is trying to “make it” in the modeling industry…
GO

Some Hot Chick Named Juliana Martins Does a Photoshoot for Zink Magazine…This is the VIdeo
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Hayden Panettiere in Some Yoga Pants….
GO

Some Amazing Teen on Camera
GO

Some Dude Gets His Eye Tattooed
GO

A Book Oprah Recommended Turns Out to have Been Written By a White Supremacist
GO

Goldie Hawn is a Fucking Wreck Who I’d Still Fuck
GO

J.Lo’s Pregnancy Confirmation Video Because You’re a Closet J.Lo Fan….
GO

Justin Timberlake Singed This Youtube Singin Slut to His Label, She’d Be Better Off Doing the Soulja Boy Dance, Like Everyone Else…I Wish My Life Was That Easy….
GO

Some Arab Driver Rolls Down the Highway on 2 Wheels
GO

Nicole Kidman is Pretty Scary Looking…
GO

Gemma Atkinson has Huge Tits in Lingerie
GO

Some Alessandra Ambrosio Lookin’ Good in some Ad
GO

Some Male Phone Sex Operators Viral
GO

Kellie Picker’s Fake Tits at the CMA’s
GO

Some Christina Ricci in Red Lookin Good
GO

3 Chicks Take a Bath Together
GO

Amazing Race Star Naked!!!
GO

Some Chick from the Office Singing About Pussy and Posing in Vintage Lingerie
GO

Rumer Willis Lookin’ Ugly with Cleavage Because That’s the Only Look She Knows….
GO

Irv Gotti Runs a Record Label and Talks About How The Internet is Fucking Him Up the Ass
GO

Jay-Z’s Roc Boys Video
GO

Exclusive Pics of Conan Hanging With His Stalker
GO

Remember Kim Kardashian is in Playboy
GO

Nothing Says Classy Like a Champagne Cork to the Balls…
GO

Drunken Bellyflop Off The Roof and To The Ground
GO

The Whore Stewardess Who Banged Ralph Fiennes in the Plane Got Cast in “I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here”…So Remember Girls, All It Takes to Be Famous is to Bang an Actor in a Plane
GO

Tom Cruise Paid Katie Holmes 600 Million Dollars to be His Wife…That’s Not a Very Good Deal….I Think She’s Only Worth About $5
GO

Shakira Lookin’ Hot and Showing Off Her Ass When She Was 16
GO

Some Asian Girl Does a Booty Dance in Booty Shorts
GO

Crackhead Sex Picture of the Day
GO

A Plastic Surgeon Confirms that Jewel Has Not Had Implants
GO

Some Made in China Toys Have GHB In Them….You Coulda Used Them To Get Your Next Date. Creep.
GO

Lohan Lookin’ Hot in Boots
GO

Some Kids Blow Up a Pumpkin
GO

Some Photobucket Nudity
GO

Lesbian Porn Moment With 2 Hot Chicks Goin’ At Each Other
GO

Spy Cam Massage Doesn’t Do Too Well
GO

From the Forum:

Download the Bee Gees Greatest Hits
GO

Download the Mickey Avalon Self Titled CD
GO

Download Korn Live and Rare If You’re Into Korn….
GO

Download Some Killers Albums
GO

Download Some Collective Soul Album Cuz You are Gay
GO

Download – Stephen Colbert – I am America (And So Can You)
GO

Some Chick Named Claudia Lizaldi’s Spread in Some Magazine Lookin’ Hot
GO

Some Hot Sluts Dirty Pictures
GO

Chicks Getting Crazy on a Lake
GO

Some Chick Named Beatrix’s Personal Naughty Pics
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

08

Nov

I am – Trying to Entertain Karter the Party Slut of the Day

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So I read my comments on the Jordan winning the ultimate woman post, which if you didn’t want to read, it said that it gives party sluts dreams to work towards instead of the unwanted pregnancies, gang bangs and winning the wet t-shirt contest they are used to.

Anyway this bitch wrote this comment:

Guess what?
Im fucking drunk and your not entertaining me so that fucking gay. whatever

So I checked out her myspace and wasn’t too surprised to find that she was an aspiring party slut and Jordan was probably one of her idols. I am sure she puts in a lot of her heart into this and predict that in about 25 pounds she will be one. Her passion to the cause is making her make all the right moves of getting drunk and ridiculous while showing off her tits and acting like a trashy slut. Unfortunately for her, she’s too drunk too realize that she doesn’t really have it going as much as she thinks she does, so the beer will keep being drunk and that 25 pounds may turn into 50, and that the only reason dudes talk to her is because she overcompensates by showing off with her big tits McDonalds gave her.

I am happy she loves herself so much that she is an alcoholic because I heard most alcoholic’s are really happy in their skin and they only drink to celebrate that fact and not to forget all the demons that rape them everyday. But remember eating disorders were invented for a reason, even if they may take away your number one asset, it may be worth looking into. I hate to rip on a bitch for being a chubby girl in slutty clothing, because let’s face it, she’s not nearly as fat as my wife, and I’d totally raw dog her, but I have no standards or money to afford a box of condoms to double up on that shit like I should.

Either way, I read this on her myspace and I assume this is what she reads to herself every night, it’s some positive affirmation shit of of a party slut that they use to convince themselves that they’ve got it going on:

Getting naughty with my body like a hottie should

Don’t call me ghetto gangsta cause Im from the hood

Thrownin down swift swagger with an attitude

If you had this kind of pimpin you would do it too

Here’s one of her third grade level poems, because education and reading isn’t something party sluts do:

choke

Remember that time
when I started to cry
not cause I was sad
cause you wouldnt die

you thought I was crazy
and I didnt deny
and you still stuck around
cause your a dumb guy

remember that night
when I tried to drug you
the fear in your eyes
you love the abuse

you thought it was funny
and it was just a joke
You liked all the pills
I dropped in your coke

you see that knife
and you know what it means
Im taking your life
Im crushing your dreams

the slashes look cool
like your someone special
how could someone you love
make you feel awful

stick around stick it out
next week will be better
I will be up
and you will be deader

Party slut Karter, I know you are drunk, but hope you entertained, because I’m workin’ for you here. Oh and remember that I just made you famous, Bitch.


Related Posts:

Check Her Out on Myspace
Some of the Other People I’ve Made Famous

Posted in:stepFAME|Unsorted

2007

08

Nov

I am – Jewel has Some Weird Cleavage of the Day

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Jewel is from Alaska. She is a woman of the wilderness, she lived in a log cabin and hunted bears. She fished and ran around in the snow barefoot. She climbed mountains, rolled around in the snow, her first boyfriend was a salmon who swam upstream…she took him under her hairy armpit and he made her cum harder than the ice dildos she was using before he came into her life….after Sammy the Salmon died, Jewel, in an emotional rage took a walk to California, where she launched her tree hugging, woman of the wilderness with an acoustic guitar in song career, that makes for amazing masturbation music, but apparently didn’t make her enough money to fix her disgusting teeth. Now she’s gone and married some Country Music Star and that motherfucker has ruined the one thing this woman of the wilderness had going for her and that’s her tits.

Like Sammy the Salmon, the fuckers have decomposed and have been given back to the land where they came from, which isn’t that big of a deal, because small tits are hot, but by the look of these fuckers, they are just empty skin sacs that hang off her body, like my wife’s clitoral hood that we haven’t been able to locate in 5 years because shits fuckin’ buried deep.

I guess the point of all this is to say that tits don’t make a woman. Vagina does. So as long as she’s still got her box, and her acoustic guitar, the only foolish game tearing you apart will be the fact that she would never give you the time of day, because you’re not as cool as her Country Star husband, and that’s pretty fuckin’ depressing…just look at him and you’re understand why…..


Related Posts:

Jewel’s Happy Marriage of the Day

Posted in:cleavage|Jewel|Tits|Unsorted

2007

08

Nov

I am – Jessica Biel’s Got Some Lesbian Dogs of the Day

Image Removed due to Papparazzi

There’s this really mean bull dyke that lives around the corner from me who is always out playing fetch with her 200 pound german defense dog….when I say playing fetch, I mean bitch is in the park wrestling the motherfucker like she’s training it to kill any man that they cross paths with. I can tell every time I walk by them and smile at her lesbian haircut and her lesbian denim and her lesbian combat boots and her lesbian tattoos and her lesbian piercings and her fat lesbian ass, and both her and her dog snarl at me, that she would just love to watch that dog rip my penis off my body and probably the body of every other man in the world so that she can have the girls all to herself. Lesbians are so selfish.

Either way, I wasn’t surprised to see that Jessica Biel has lesbian dogs, mainly because she’s a dude. So she’s just training her dogs to rip her penis off, because she hates it for fuckin’ up her act and it’s time to get rid of it, instead of the penis of every man in the world like the bull dyke who lives in my ‘hood.

I like how she’s not making eye contact with the paparazzi, like pretending they aren’t there and it reminds me of every girl I’ve ever had sex with and that totally turns me on. Does that make me gay?

UPDATE – I HAD TO REMOVE THE PICTURES BECAUSE THE PAPARAZZI ARE FUCKING LEACHING MOTHERFUCKERS WHO WANT TO EXPLOIT PEOPLE AND MAKE TRUCKLOADS OF MONEY……AND ME POSTING THEM TO THE 6 OF YOU IS APPARENTLY ILLEGAL, BUT TAKING THE PICTURES AND SELLING THEM ISN’T. COCKSUCKERS


Related Posts:

Jessica Biel Fighting Back in a Non-Lesbian Way
Jessica Biel’s Dog is a Man’s Best Friend, and by Man, I Mean Her
essica Biel Wearing What She Wore to Prom
Jessica Biel in Her Underwear from That Shitty Adam Sandler Movie

Posted in:Dogs|Jessica Biel|Man|Unsorted

2007

08

Nov

I am – Jordan is the Ultimate Woman of the Year

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I think the Ultimate joke of the day is that Jordan won some Cosmopolitan Best Woman award. I am guessing their criteria is to be a total party slut with no self respect and big fake titties that married dudes want to fuck because their wives are fat and disgusting and she’s some kind of object of their masturbation fantasies.

I think it sends a good message to the kids though, kinda like the Paris Hilton sex tape that made a generation of teens addicted to sex and cocaine, which is a lot more fun than my generation of teens who were addicted to knitted sweaters and panty rules. The truth is that there still aren’t enough drunken girls flashing their panties and letting dudes tag team them after a night of drinking. There are a lot more than there used to be, but there are still some girls with morals left and maybe this will encourage them to drop studying and to take on drinking, because I don’t remember the last time a Doctor won the Ultimate Girl award.

This also gives the girls who are party sluts saving up for a set of fake tits so that they can win the Spring Break wet t-shirt contest this year something else to work towards, because after the wet t-shirt contest there only other goal was just getting so many abortions that they can’t have kids anymore so they don’t have to bother spending a lot of money on condoms they never use and the birth control pill they always forget to take.


Related Posts:

Jordan Promoting Her Signature Line of Hair Products
Jordan’s Drunken Panty Upskirt
Jordan Topless on the Beach
Jordan Pregnant Bikini Pictures

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

08

Nov

I am – UFO Sighting in Canada of the Day

This was just sent into me and I decided to post it, since the last alien I wrote about was Hayden Panettiere and figure it’d be nice to switch it up. So this exciting video is of a UFO sighting in Canada and all I can do is laugh at the dude’s funny accent. I am pretty desensitized to all this paranormal shit, because I don’t give a fuck whether ghosts or alien exists and there’s all kinds of documented sightings from weird people who I wouldn’t trust baby sitting my kids and I don’t even have kids, so that’s how weird the fuckers are. It’s like whenever I tell dudes who have sisters that if I had a sister I’d totally get down with them all through my teens and that they wasted prime opportunity of having them sneak into their room at night,. They always get disgusted, but to me she’s just another chick that’s more accessible since you live in the same house an it’s not like she’s going to tell anyone because society is totally against that kind of hookin’ up, but if she does, they’ll be taking you away.

Either way, if we exist, then the chances of aliens exist are pretty fucking high based on common sense. To say that God put us on this earth to do our thing and is going to blow us up because we are sinners makes a lot less sense than the concept of Aliens existing, unless God was an alien and this shit is like the science fair project I made in the fifth grade that was on sewage. I basically shat in a box and failed, even though I made that shit myself, unlike the annoying rich girl who made some elaborate hydro-electric dam.

So here’s your UFO Sighting in Canada. Maybe it’s a military test, maybe it’s Paris Hilton coming back from the future like Marty Mcfly since she is getting cryogenically frozen and by the time they figure out how to defrost a herpes ridden whore, they’ll probably have invented a time machine that they probably didn’t use too often, because otherwise they’d know what the fuck they were getting themselves into and they’d keep the bitch on ice and maybe it’s actually aliens but I just think it’s a bunch of inuits having a good time eating a raw seal and huffin’ some gasoline.

Posted in:Aliens|Canada|UFO|Unsorted

2007

08

Nov

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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Today was just one of those days where nothing worked out. Most days don’t work out for me and today I couldn’t get onto the internet and when I did the shitty computer I was using kept crashing and it’s been a fucking struggle. I am hungover and it is midnight, I haven’t eaten today because the wife finished off the last of the food and all the stores around me are closed, so stealing from them isn’t an option. I will just live off the land that is the fat belly I rock. It’s not that big of a deal because there is always tomorrow. So get ready, because I am already doing my finger stretches…

We’ve got a contest going on in the stepFORUM that I assume no one will take part in, because I have no readers. But check it out anyway:

Win a Mark Ronson CD Because He’s Popular Right Now…
GO

I also got this email about some free Lenny Kravitz show for people in Souther California and I figured I’d let you know, because that’s just the kind of guy I am, even though I doubt any of you live in Southern California, you seem more like a Texarkana crowd….

Attention Southern California Lenny Kravitz fans!! Want to be a part of an exclusive major internet event with Lenny Kravitz?

Yahoo! Music and Virgin Records want you to join us when Lenny Kravitz takes the stage for Nissan Live Sets in West Los Angeles, CA.

November 13, 2007
7 pm (subject to change, you need to arrive two hours before)
Location: West Los Angeles

The first 200 fans to email us at invites@yahoolivesets.com will get in the doors for this exclusive taping. Plus you get to bring a friend. Please email us your name, your location, and tell us how much of a fan you are of Lenny Kravitz! We will contact you if you are chosen to attend.

PLEASE DO NOT SEND MULTIPLE EMAILS

You must be at least 13 years old to attend. Fans under 18 must be accompanied by an adult. You must provide your own transportation and accommodations (if necessary).

This is a once-in-a-lifetime experience!

This invitation is not transferable, without the express permission of Yahoo!. Yahoo! reserves the right to rescind any invitation, at any time, in its sole discretion.

lennykravitz.com/contest/
myspace.com/lennykravitz

Here are my shitty links:

Need For Speed Chick Named Krystal Forscutt Lookin’ Hot Half Naked
GO

Watch the Thonged Ass Preview of a Girl Fight on Tila Tequila’s A Shot at Love. A Great Show For The Kids…
GO

Some Dude Drinks His Beer Through His Nose
GO

Some Girls Who Love Voyeurs and Get Naked For Them
GO

Some Dude Smashes a Girls Pumpkin and Gets Knocked The Fuck Out….
GO

Mandy Moore is Dating Matthew Perry Because She Sure Knows How To Pick Winners….
GO

Shakira Showing Off Some Cleavage and Still Kinda Hot
GO

Some Vintage Black Momma Beating The Shit Out of a Dude Video
GO

Eva Mendes in the 2008 Campari Calendar Lookin’ Good
GO

Kylie Minogues Got Some Hard Nipples…I Guess They Are Real…
GO

Evangeline Lilly Is Single and Here are Some Bikini Pictures of Her
GO

Duran Duran’s Video Has a Hotter than Britney Look-A-Like Being Sent to Rehab
GO

Nick Hogan’s Finally Been Arrested
GO

Pictures of the Sluts at the CMA Bullshit that Went Down The Other Day…
GO

Ashlee Simpson’s Lookin’ Good Again
GO

Fabio and George Clooney Have a Fight in a Restaurant….Amazing…
GO

Some Whore Named Anita Dark – Naked
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Some Nut Case Talkin’ His Craziness About White Helicopter Paranoia
GO

Carmen Electra Looking Good in a Bikini During Spring Break 2000
GO

Some Dude Tells Someone To Fuck Off on TV
GO

Britney Spears Showing Some Panty Pictures….Because I Know This Shit Gets You Off…
GO

Dog the Bounty Hunter Explains Why He Isn’t Down With the Brothers….
GO

Katherine Heigl Wearing a Thong Bathing Suit When She Was 16 Video
GO

Top 10 Faceplant Moments
GO

Scary Nipple Ring Video
GO

Angelina Jolie is Shy About Her Fake Nude Scene in Her New Movie….I Remember a Time When She Was a Whore
GO

How about The Moo And Oink Dance…Insanity
GO

A Whole Lot of Amateur Girl Pictures
GO

Paris Hilton is Lookin’ as Obnoxious as Fuck in Korea…
GO

2 Girls Making Out in Another Language
GO

Tiger Bangs a Dog VIdeo
GO

Pete Doherty Apologizes
GO

Some Fat Chick Gets Stuck in a Trench and Starts To Panic Like Most Fat People Do
GO

Brown Bagged Fergie In a Short Dress With Armani
GO

Paris and Nicky Hilton Annoying in Japan
GO

Here is the Fantasy Picture of the Day
GO

Jennifer Walcott Megapost With Lots of Slutty Pictures
GO

How About Some Sex With a Stick Shift
GO

Pictures of a Girl Showering
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Woman Takes a Bath in Cow Shit To Be On TV
GO

Some Inside the Vagina Music Video
GO

Diver’s Making O-Faces
GO

Watch the Mustache Man on The Peoples Court
GO

Gemma Atkinson’s Huge Tits in Lingerie
GO

Mini-Bike Through the Neighbor’s Fence Video
GO

Some Dude Pranks His Roommate With Fishing Line….and Videotapes It…
GO

Jane Seymour Got Breast Implants for this Sex Scene
GO

Some Crazy Bitch is Deathly Afraid of Chickens and Maury Chases Her With a Man in a Chick Costume…an She Freaks The Fuck Out…Someone Told Me It’s Old…But It’s New To Me….
GO

Some Young Girl Showing Her Tits and Underwear Off on Photobucket
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Some Girl Naked for Her Boyfriend on Photobucket
GO

More Photobucket Sleaze and by Sleaze I Mean Girls Posing In their Underwear
GO

Fishnets and Tits on Phootbucket
GO

Some Blow Job Ad
GO

Some girl Shows Ron Jeremy Her Tits Cuz He’s Ron Jeremy
GO

Use These Dating Tips To Get Laid
GO

I They Don’t Work, Use this
GO

Read SOme Porn Reviews
GO

From the Forum

Download Led Zepplin Mothership Album
GO

Christina Aguilera In Maxim Download
GO

Some Stripper Named Maria’s Pictures
GO

Shark Fucks a Whale Video
GO

Japanese Girls Making Out
GO

Download the Body Rockers Album
GO

Download Some Live an Rare Smashing Pumpkins Album
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

07

Nov

I am – Jessica Biel is an Idiot of the Day

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I can only assume that Jessica Biel is taking pictures of the one paparazzi that Splash or x17 or TMZ sent to cover the exciting Jessica Biel getting out of her car story to prove to her friends and family back home that people actually do follow her around and care about her existence, she’s not just making the whole thing up like she is with her “vagina”. I think it’s time for her to just give up her act and make a video of Justin doing his choreographed dance while singing in his high pitched voice while her huge cock plays the microphone.

What we don’t see in these pictures, is that the paparazzi that was sent to the exciting Jessica Biel getting out of her car story wasn’t actually the paparazzi at all, but the immigrant Janitor who was forced to take the CEO’s kid out to the dentist because he forgot to empty the trash the day before and this was his punishment. The boss is too busy raping all of the celebrity blogs up the ass to be an involved parent and figured why not give them a camera, just in case they run into someone who may be famous and by famous I mean fucking Justin Timberlake, because other than her shitty Adam Sandler movie she hasn’t been too busy since Seventh Heaven fired her for being a whore in Details magazine. I wonder what her preacher father thinks of her and her homosexual relationship now, but I bet he’s not very tolerant.

I don’t know where I am going with this, but I hate when celebs or people who think they are celebs because they were on a TV show a long time ago because they had big tits and decided to stay in LA hoping someone throws some table scraps of a job their way, take pictures of the paparazzi. I would rather they do something a little more crafty, like make Christmas Ornaments, or pullin’ out her dick and pissing on them, kinda like Hayden Panettiere does every time no one’s watchin’ and doesn’t have to pee sitting down pretending she’s a lady. I told you I’d mention her in every post today and I am a man of my word.


Related Posts:

Jessica Biel GQ Bikini Pictures
Jessica Biel in a Gay Porn Moment
Jessica Biel Taking Out the Trash in Her Robe
Jessica Biel Making Sex Faces

Posted in:Jessica Biel|Man|Paparazzi|Unsorted

2007

07

Nov

I am – Heidi Klum Reliving The Past of the Day

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I always like watching middle-aged women trying to relive their youth. I was walking down the street the other day and saw some annoying mother with her two tween daughters wearing the same fucking outfit. They all had tights, UGGS, cellphones with decorative bullshit on them and were all drinking an iced coffee drink from Starbucks like they were Hayden Panettiere, who by the way, I decided to mention in every post today. They were all talking like annoying fucking teenage girls and for some reason, it made me want to take the mom’s virginity, even though it was long gone.

I was at a bar the other day and saw a group of older bitches trying to rock out to Soulja Boy. They were laughing and having a good time, which was good because based on their looks they didn’t have much else going for them and it was nice to see that despite their shortcomings and bad aging, they could still have a good time. I don’t think they had any idea what the Soulja Boy song or the dance was, but they were wasted and looking for husbands. It was funny realizing that I am the same age as they are but I am way more in tune with pop culture….I got my finger on the pulse of that shit thanks to the internet being my social life and everyone knows that doing an old lady dirty get me pregnant so I can have meaning in my useless lonely one night stand filled life old lady dance to Soulja Boy just doesn’t fly, like Superman….Crank Dat.

Either way, here is Heidi Klum back on the runway for her Project Runway show, that I like to call the retirement plan, because bitch is too old to model, but still looks better than you do when you put on your mom’s heels and pose in front of the mirror, fruitcake.


Related Posts:

Heidi
Heidi Klum’s Pregnancy Weight
Heidi Klum Tight Bodied Post-Pregnant in an Expensive Bikini
Heidi Klum’s Camel Toe, From When I was on Blogger…We’ve Come So Far Together

Posted in:Heidi Klum|Model|Runway|Unsorted

2007

07

Nov

I am – Megan Fox Has Hard Nipples of the Day

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Megan Fox is pretty much one of the hottest actors in Hollywood right now and that’s not really saying much because I am more of a model kind of guy than an actor kind of guy, so I don’t get too excited about actors or singers being hot ever, but then again I don’t get excited for much, not even Christmas.

The reason I don’t like actors is that they remind me of circus performers. They are convinced that they’ve got some kind of talent because they can make themselves cry on demand or memorize words, and the industry pats them on the back because it lines their pockets, stroking the actor’s egos, making them think they are way more important to the world than they really are. My neighbor’s kid cries on demand every time his dad hits him and I heard him reciting the alphabet the other day so dude may be 3 but he could be the next Hayden Panettiere, he just has to grow his hair out.

The other reason I don’t like actors is because they are short and in an ideal world, girls would have legs that pretty much end at my face and models do. The model lifestyle is also a lot more interesting to me because they go out and party, do a lot of drugs, sit on beaches because their work is about as demanding as just showing up on time, and if they are big enough, they set the time they start and they make insane money for just being hot.

Either way, here are Megan Fox’s nipples that the dude from 90210 sucks, and better cherish the fucking moment, because she’ll eventually realize that he’s a joke and even if he’s got a big dick, she’ll be movin’ on to less embarrassing dudes because she won’t need their failure to make her feel better about her career, cuz that shit’s about to pop.


Related Posts:

Megan Fox Hot in Red
Megan Fox Hot in Shorts
Megan Fox in Skate Shoes With Her Asshole Boyfriend
Megan Fox Grabs Her Boyfriend’s Boner

Posted in:Hot|Megan Fox|Nipples|Tits|Unsorted

2007

07

Nov

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I still haven’t sorted out my internet connection, so I am all fucking confused. The internet is my second best friend besides booze. I was trying to interview some crackheads tonight that I found in an alley and they weren’t too into the whole thing and ended up going fucking insane on me. When I asked if they’d suck my dick for crack money, they lost it. I wasn’t going to actually let them do it, it was all for comedic purposes. Unfortunately, I didn’t have a camera, I was just doing it for my own personal entertainment. Maybe next time…

Here are my links:

NYC’s Hottest Models
GO

Some Crazy Old Black Crackhead Has it Out with the Cops
GO

Nicola Roberts has a Panty Upskirt
GO

Yamila Diaz, Heidi Klum, Petra Nemcova and Daniela Pestova Shoot For Sports Illustrated Video
GO

Some Girl Showing Off Her Disgusting Fake Basketball Tits
GO

Rihanna at the World Music Awards With Her Tits
GO

Alessandra Ambrosio for Armani Exchange
GO

Game Show Host Beats Up His Guests
GO

Some Arab Chick Shows Off Her Tits on Webcam
GO

Check Out the Most Beautiful Ass in the World…
GO

Amy Fisher is Suing the Porn Company that is Going to Release Her Sex Tape
GO

Jessica Simpson Almost Falling Over in a Dress
GO

Keira Knightley is Jokes in an Elle Interview
GO

Kate Moss’ Dirty Mattress Makes me Horny, Not Because Kate Moss Shit Herself, But Because Dirty Mattresses are Fucking Sexy
GO

Eva Longoria Gives the Writes on Strike Pizza
GO

Some Teacher Beats the Fuck Out Of His Student
GO

Katie Holmes New Movie is Under Lock and Key and It’s Going to Suck Harder Than Tom Cruise in a Back Alley
GO

Hilary Duff Gives Lap Dances cuz Every Girl Dreams of Being a Stripper
GO

Hayden Panettiere Leaves the Gym Lookin’ Tough
GO

Some Asshole Shoots Off AssRockets
GO

Katherine Heigl Smoking Pictures for Horny Lohan Wanker
GO

Jail Bait of the Day is Actually Legal…
GO

Ron Jeremy Parodies Britney Spears’ Gimme More A Few Months Too Late
GO

Leticia Cline and Her Friend Showing Off Their Tits
GO

Brande Roderick for Playboy Pictures
GO

Ashley Tisdale Photoshoot Video
GO

Glamour Women of the Year Awards
GO

Asian’s Eat a Live Fish Because They Are Weird
GO

Lohan’s Loser Boyfriend is Already Making Statements About Lohan’s Mom and Their Move to their New Pad in NYC…Dude’s Won the Lottery But It’s Not Going to Last
GO

Lily Allen is the New Fat Chick for Agent Provocateur
GO

Some Chick Named Candice Michelle’s Bikini Photoshoot
GO

Some Band Named Endever After’s New NSFW Video With Titties and Girl on Girl Action
GO

In response to the 30 Reasons Movement on Facebook – This Site Compiled Their Own Collection of Drunken Sluts from Facebook. I wish I was smart enough to get the same publicity as the guy who started his facebook group, because 30 reasons is a lot easier to write than this site for 3 years. I am Bitter. Look at the sluts:
GO

Some Lesbian Chicks Gallery
GO

Blondes from The Girls Next Door, The Real Housewives of Orange County and Sunset Tan Talking About Useless Shit in Bikinis
GO

Some Amateur Nudist
GO

Halle Berry Naked Sex Scene from Monster’s Ball – Vintage
GO

The Winona Ryder Sex Scene that Sucks So Much It’s Not Banned on YouTube Video
GO

Local Virgin is Considering IPO of her Vagina
GO

Kids are Getting High Off Human Waste
GO

Monica Bellucci in Some Trasy Lingerie Photoshoot
GO

Watch the Naked Pumpkin Run Video
GO

Spankrock’s New Dirty Video Called Pu$$y by Splunny
GO

Ron Jeremy’s Got a Coffee Table Book
GO

Some Goth Chick Takes a Picture of Herself
GO

Lucy Pinder Topless
GO

Petra Nemcova’s Blowing Some Kisses
GO

Some Webcam Chick – Webcammin’
GO

Crave Online Interviews The Cast Of Family Guy
GO

A Whole Lot of Micro-Bikini Action
GO

This Will Get You Laid
GO

School Girl Cream Pies Only Gets an 80
GO

From the Forum:

Download Rihanna – The Singles Collection Because You Are Probably Single
GO

Download Pink Floydd
GO

Download Maxim’s Porno Goes Pop
GO

Download the PDF of some Hustler Magazine
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

06

Nov

I am – Tyra Banks Talking About Vagina of the Day

I was emailed this video from someone and basically Tyra tells her audience to go home and take out a pocket mirror to check out their box to see what they are dealing with, kinda like what you do with your asshole every night before sticking things in it, weirdo. The fact that her audience don’t know anything about their vaginas is fucking obscure to me, because ever girl I have ever met has been pretty good friends with her vagina and so was every guy who had ever crossed their path. Maybe I’m hanging with the wrong crowd and should hunt down bitches who have no idea how their cunt’s work, but I have a feeling that someone who knows what’s going on in their pants is a lot more willing to let me find out what’s going on in her pants too, kinda like sharing the wealth, than some bitch who pretended her vagina never existed all her life.

To me, there is no perfect vagina, I’ve come across so many variations and they all feel the same, so girls who are insecure that your pussy looks like a roast beef sandwich, don’t worry about it. Guys are fucking horny and desperate and have no issues sticking things in your brown-edged, pink, meaty junk. Tyra, I’m talking to you.


Related Posts:

Tyra Touchign Her Tits
ANTM – CariDee English in a Blue Dress
ANTM – Naked Photoshoot
ANTM – Melrose Topless Pics

Posted in:Tyra Banks|Unsorted|Vagina

2007

06

Nov

I am – Alyson Hannigan Lookin' Good in her Pajamas of the Day

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I am a huge fan of low maintenance girls who can just role out of bed and go out and do their errands lookin’ hot as fuck without any effort, while rocking a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. It’s some natural beauty shit that you never really get to experience, because most people look like shit when they wake up.

Here are some pictures of Alyson Hannigan rockin’ out in her pajamas like she just woke up and she’s doing it as well as she can, because let’s face it, the only way this bitch will ever look hot is if someone replaced her with a new cast member and locked her away in some cage in a basement or some shit. Even when she is made up and out at events , she still looks like a fuckin’ monster, and I’d love to just blame it one her being a Ginger because Gingers generally scare the fuck out of me since they aren’t human and spawns of the devil, but I think it’s got more to do with her face.

I guess we can keep dreaming that one day Alyson Hannigan will be replaced like she was on a soap opera or like she was the mother on Fresh Prince of Bel Air, or like an old condemned building being torn down and replaced with luxury condos and no one would really notice the change, because all of a sudden this bitch no one notices now will become some hot slut we all want to bang and will just accept the new version as if the old falling apart version never existed.

Either way, here she is lookin’ low maintenance, like she just crawled out of bed, like the hot chicks I see running errands or studying in the library, when she should be putting all the effort and money she can into herself if she ever wants dudes jerking off to her, which she does, because all girls want that.


Related Posts:


Alyson Hannigan in Fuck Me Boots (no thanks)
Alyson Hannigan Bikini Pictures
More Alyson Hannigan Bikini Pictures

Posted in:Alyson Hannigan|Busted|Gross|Ugly|Unsorted