I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

28

Aug

Keely Shaye Smith Bronsan is Still Fat in Her Bikini of the Day

[ Images removed in compliance with DMCA Notice ]

Keely Shaye Smith, although not as fat as my wife, is still not the woman Pierce Bronsan married. We should give her some recognition of the achievement that is wearing a bikini, not because she is defying the norm and embracing her really fat flaws that are more laziness and overeating than actual flaws, like a woman accepting who she is and not letting her stop her like she’s some kind of amputee going for a jog or some shit and doesn’t deserve that kind of acknowledgment or reward, but the mere fact that she managed to find a bikini in her size is legendary and one for the fuckin’ books. She’s disgusting, has no business getting out of her elastic waste band fat chick jeans, but does it anyway and I’d thank her for encouraging other fat chicks to do the same, but the last thing I want is to see more obesity scantily glad, so instead I’ll just tell her to fuck herself.

[ Images removed in compliance with DMCA Notice ]

Posted in:Bikini|Fat|Keely Shaye Smith Bronsan

2008

28

Aug

Miranda Kerr Isn’t That Hot of the Day

I am already excited about going out and getting drunk in a couple of hours because I can’t seem to remember all the funny shit I saw yesterday and I need new material. Every couple of months, my brain just stops working on me and shit I tell myself to remember always just disappear, but I do know that it is Frosh week and despite how annoying it is seeing a bunch of young girls hanging out with a bunch of lame dudes that they just met when they moved to the city wasted, naive and pretty much acting as wild as they fuckin’ can, it’s better than sitting on my couch listening to my wife breathing in the other room.

That said, Miranda Kerr is supposed to be this prodigy model and everyone is freaking out about her and I just don’t get it. There’s really nothing special about her and to honor that, I wrote a post that is really nothing special. It happens.

Posted in:Hot|Miranda Kerr

2008

28

Aug

Only God Can Judge Jodie Marsh and Her Tits of the Day

I don’t know what I am more scared of having unprotected sex with, self proclaimed sluts who have tattoos on their arm that read “my crazy life, only god can judge me” and who wear ridiculous outfits out to events showing off their retarded big tits that made them lots of money, or everyday single girls who bang more men in a year that Jodie Marsh has in a lifetime. It’s like we all like to judge the exhibitionist tacky girls, but we sweep the Sex in the City, one night stand queens who dress classy and have careers but like having as many men as possible because sex is fun under the rug. It’s like the girl you think you want to bring home to your mom, has seen more cock than a Rooster farmer because shit fills her miserable void and the girl who looks like she definitely has herpes just likes male attention but never actually puts out because putting out is beneath her when all her life all guys wanted was to get in her pussy. It really doesn’t matter, but what does matter is that I don’t agree with her tattoo that she got to feel better about her slutty antics, because I am judging her right now and her and her big tits can’t stop me.

Posted in:Jodie Marsh|Slut

2008

28

Aug

Madonna is a 50 Year Old in Fishnets and Lingerie in Concert of the Day

I am sure I am not the only person who has masturbated to Madonna in their lifetime. Whether it was the movie Truth or Dare or her Sex book, she was always a driving force in being a naughty little girl. Unfortunately, like all naught little girls, they grow up and now she’s 50, on tour and trying to hold onto the fact that we all jerked off to her at one point in our lives, without realizing that her vagina has expired. She is pretty fit for an old lady but still an old lady and I, along with the front row at her concert are happy her underwear bottoms and fishnet outfit she’s wearing are tight enough to keep her shit in place, because I’d hate to see her uterus fall on the stage, actually I’d probably love it, but it would still be disgusting to see. This is her at her concert in Nice France and shit’s definitely not as Nice as it could be. You liked that shitty play on words, admit it.

Posted in:Bikini|Concert|Lingerie|Madonna

2008

28

Aug

Emmy Rossum has a New Blackberry of the Day

I don’t know who Emmy Rossum is but I do know she dresses pretty inappropriate to Blackberry launch parties. Bitch is rockin’ some kind of dominatrix outfit you’d expect to see on Rihanna when performing or in the underground clubs I’ve always wanted to frequent but always get turned away at the door because I am alone and not in a pair of chaps. I mean it may be the tamest latex outfit I’ve seen, but like my pervert friend who always talks about this 300 dollar PVC outfit he bought a girlfriend a few years ago and who he has since then passed on to every girl he’s fucked because he can’t cum unless he gets to see it drip of the girl he is with’s slicked up bodysuit, it’s good enough to generate some dirty thoughts and that makes it good enough for me, which isn’t saying much considering I can turn a grandmother grocery shopping into a sexual experience, like last week when I almost got hard over a 90 year old with a walker because I liked the way it made her stick her ass out like she wanted it. I’m not necessarily normal though, and I guess Emmy Rossum is trying to break free from being labeled normal in this small step towards sluttiness that I approve.

If you’re wondering where people go after running over kids while talking on their cellphones, it turns out they hit up the Blackberry launch, because it’s really only normal for murders to always keep their murder weapons up to date. Like when a hunter buys a special edition just released gun or some shit, only the running over kids version…

Posted in:Blackberry|Emmy Rossum|Latex

2008

28

Aug

Ashley Tisdale Got a Haircut of the Day

Writing about celebrities I don’t care about everyday is pretty fucking tedious. Before starting this site I was way more self absorbed and would really only worry about what was going on in my everyday life and wouldn’t really pay any attention to what rich and glamorous girl who I didn’t find half as hot as some of the girls giving me lapdances, was in a bikini, but unfortunately this is the life I chose and the course I took and I am so on top of shit that when Ugly Jewish Girl who is actually almost 30 but pretends she’s closer to 20 to get roles of the day get haircuts, I notice.

I never thought I’d spend my day trying to say clever things about some of the most uninspiring things out there, but I guess it’s better than my last job packin’ boxes at a food processing plant that I got fired from for being drunk. Sure the money’s not as good, but I have no one to tell me that I am not allowed to drop my pants, drink my booze and smoke my cigars. It’s almost as amazing as the fact that people actually find Ashley Tisdale someone hot and worth jerking off to, I can only assume have lowered their standards because they think she’s actually a real life highschool girl and not just a slut pretending to be one, because in my experience older guys always lower their standards when they find a teenager willing to fuck them, because there is no other reason for anyone calling this piece hot.

Here she is wearing a period shirt so that it doesn’t stain when shit splashes up when she’s peeing.

Here she is in some crazy pants….before the Haircut….

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|Haircut

2008

28

Aug

Rapper Pisses on His Groupie to Get Noticed of the Day

I think this kind of Necro rap is really representative of the fall of society. These are white Jewish thugs who totally misunderstood what being “hard” was all about and have taken their music and image to this really dark place trying to get some kind of street cred that I can’t respect. I don’t see talent, I just see white kids in small towns imitating them even though they are Jewish and this is all an act, because the Jews I know are all little pussies behind the tough guy, pervert ballin’ image. They are the first to call their lawyers and whine like little bitches when push comes to shove, but until they get beat up for the first time we have to deal with this misogynistic act of pissing and slapping bitches. I find the whole thing pretty embarrassing for them, especially considering they had to pay this bitch to do it and she didn’t do it because she thought they were awesome….

I am posting it anyway because just the other day, I was walking with my hot 18 year old friend and 2 white kids in inexpensive thug gear rolled by in a Chrysler 300 they thought was a Bentley. They went on to cat call her with me there, screaming that they had a record deal and would be worth 45 million in 2 years and for her to get in. I didn’t do anything about it, because I didn’t really care since I was the one walking with her, and these kind of hot heads who listen to this garbage music are the first to take a tire iron to a Mexican’s head to tell their friends about and I knew eventually they’d drive away, just like I’m hoping Necro and his shitty crew do too.

Watch the video. It’s really too much, and not in a good way and remember this is coming from someone who has pissed on a girl and will piss on a girl again, but who likes to keep that shit private and behind closed doors and not as some really desperate attempt for attention.

Posted in:Golden Shower|Necro|Promo Video|Rivera Regime

2008

27

Aug

stepLINKS of the Day

So it looks like I may have over-reacted in my panic and paranoia that made me believe I was the next to get arrested for blogging like I lived in Communist Russia or some shit, and Skwerl’s been let out. I guess I should stop production on my “you can cage a Skwerl but you can’t stop Jesus” T-shirts.

The good news is that he now got the biggest marketing push possible and will be huge, make a lot of money and forget about the little guys like me, I guess I’ll just have to get myself arrested.

I don’t know any of the details, I am still scared of the corporate world regulating the internet and fucking up what I do because I’ll be forced to listen to them, but I guess I was a little over dramatic, it happens when I am drunk. I still think that Axl Rose and his Guns N Roses album that’s been in the making for 10 years, will prove to be the longest shit ever taken in history by a vagina. Well call that shit pussy shit and here are my links.

The Top Ten International Olympic Babes Because The Olympics Will Never End….
GO

Matthew McConaughey’s Mom is the Most Amazing Old Lady on the Planet
GO

Bianca Beauchamp is All Fired Up in Red. Wonder If the Carpet Matches the Drapes on this Quebec Whore…
GO

Retarded Policeman is a Mega Fan
GO

What the Fuck is So Appealing About Justine Long? Does He Have a Horse Cock Or Something?
GO

Jessica Simpson Upskirt Ass Cheek
GO

Gossip Girl Sluts At Some Event
GO

Where is Michael Phelps Father?
GO

Find The Best Porn on the Internet According to Me
GO

The Hottest Porn Stars Behind Bars
GO

The 10 Greatest Referee Attacks in Sports History
GO

Some Random Megan Fox in Panties Pictures
GO

O-Face or Country Star Face
GO

Hot College Cheerleader Lilly Robbins in Maxim:
GO

American Apparel Video of a Damn Fine Ass Trying on Panties:
GO

Guess Who Has Hollywood’s Sexiest Feet:
GO

Fernanda Ferrari Will Rev Your Engine
GO

Some Celebrity See THrough Photoshop Magic
GO

Olympian Alicia Sacramone Knocks Some Dude Out
GO

So Something Worthwhile Today
GO

Solange, What the Fuck Are You Wearing?
GO

Now THAT’S an Explosion!!
GO

Emmanuelle Chriqui in Bikini and Boots
GO

That’s Some Good Parenting Momma!
GO

Texas Twins Say Howdy
GO

Apparently, Rosalia Verne Is Topless for the Very First Time
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Hot Blonde Gets a Massage
GO

Here’s Some More Items From Tara Reids Shitty Clothing Line, Which Can Really Only Be Made BEtter If She Isn’t Wearing Clothes At All
GO

Some Reporter Fucks with Pamela Anderson
GO

Charlize Theron Would be a Riot in the Sack, I Can Tell
GO

Paris Hilton Comments on Something or Another Because She Has Nothing Better to Do
GO

There’s Something Bout Hambone
GO

Kelly Osbounre Got Knocked the Fuck Out, At Least That’s What I Would Like to Believe
GO

Body, Meet Cement
GO

No THAT’S Penis Envy
GO

Why Hello Young Amateurs
GO

Night Vision Sex Tape Fun
GO

Vanessa Minnillo Just Needs to Look Good and Stop Talking
GO

Katie Fey Takes a Shower
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Denise Milani is in a Bikini
GO

the Catholic Church Hates Rickey Martin, but They Hate Everyone, So Whatever
GO

And Here I Though Golf Was Boring!
GO

Quite Possbly the Stupidest Thing I Have Ever Seen Anyone Do
GO

Landi Swanepoel is Very Nice
GO

Hack Voting Machines and Cause Some Shit
GO

Here’s a Psycho Orgasm For You To Watch Since You’re a Psycho
GO

Small Titties in a Red Bikini Top
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

27

Aug

Blogger Arrested for Posting Unreleased Guns and Roses Songs of the Day

A blogger who I talk to via email was arrested for posting Guns N Roses songs back in June. His site is called Antiquiet, I link to him randomly and I haven’t been able to reach out to him, because he is in fucking jail but I do have to say my piece about this shit, because it makes me fucking furious.

Before I go off, I just want to say that Guns N Roses fucking suck, they are a dated band that have no business reuniting and that’s probably why they are trying to generate some buzz around their shit, because I heard one of the songs on the radio and Axl Rose is a tired useless fuck with an irritating voice and every time an old Guns N Roses song hits wherever I am, I peace the fuck out, because it doesn’t bring back memories of High School dances, but does irritate the fuck out of me.

Now as someone who has a blog and deals with copyright shit daily and may even be the next on the chopping block of whatever the fuck I am doing wrong according to the big mean corporate man and law makers, I have to say that it’s a crime to arrest someone for having a space on the internet to air their laundry, talk shit and run commentary on shit they see and hear. I would never post a full album of a band on the site or host it on my server because I know the record companies are struggling and aggressive, but I do post pictures I find on forums and get emailed to me that I admittedly never take myself.

The dude did not sneak into Axl Rose’s house and steal his record or rip the record and post it online, it’s something that he came across because someone else stole it and he’s got to pay the price and if anything was just sharing information and not monetizing off someone else’s work because I am pretty sure he didn’t make money off distributing the shit.

I heard that he received a cease and desist to take down the songs and he complied, I heard he wasn’t even hosting the songs, and the fact he got arrested and not just sued by the record company makes no sense to me. Almost all Bloggers aren’t legitimate media sources, it’s one step away from a fuckin’ faggot diary, only a few make serious money, so how do they expect us to either license their shit that are set at crazy prices for real media sources, or know that what we are posting isn’t allowed to be posted. The whole thing is crazy….

I just wanted to get this out there, because we need to protect each other now that the internet is going more and more mainstream and is getting more and more controlled and we need to make sure we all have a place to express ourselves and opinions and share information without fearing the evil book burners knocking on our doors and taking us the fuck away.

I hope Skwerl, the dude behind the site, is staying strong and that all this blows over when Guns N Roses drops the charges like the pussies they are and he can turn around and sell his site to Yahoo for 20,000,000 dollars or some shit, but until then, I am asking you to offer your support anyway you can, we just can’t let these fuckers win the fight, or there will be no room for any independent thought and we’ll just be drones in their shitty society of lies….I don’t want to sound like some faggot hippy or something but I am mad about this and really fucking happy to be in Canada. It is a dark day for the Internet, Freedom of Speech and Bloggers today because this is just going to give other people ideas…they can’t get away with this.

Read More on the Story HERE

Read the Official Statement on His Site About the FBI’s Crazy Antics in Arresting Him Like He’s a Fuckin’ Serial Killer or Some Shit…. HERE

If you are in LA go to LA District Court on 255 E. Temple, Los Angeles, Ca @ 2pm today 8-27-08

Posted in:blogger|Copyright|Prison|Uncategorized

2008

27

Aug

Christina Ricci’s Got Some Hard Breast Reduced Nipples of the Day

[ Images removed in compliance with DMCA Notice ]

I knew a girl who had her breast reduced because they were a sloppy mess that aimed to the ground like she was a fat chick, because she was a fat chick in her past and had lost a lot of weight doing coke, leaving her a couple empty potato sacks on her chest that when in clothes made her look like she was still that fat chick and like she never had an eating disorder or drug addiction and she wasn’t having that so she opted for the reduction.

Besides the anchor shaped scar that always reminded me of this dude named Bill who I used to drink with. He was in the Navy and had an anchor tattoo and would always tell me stories of getting busted jerkin off on the job and getting STDs when comin’ to port, only her tits were pretty much perfectly shaped, and when she would never wear bras and always have hard nipples. When I asked her why her nipples were always ready to cut boxes and hijack planes to fly into national monuments, she would always tell me how the doctor fucked up her shit and ever since the surgery they were ultra sensitive, like if played with proper, she could come from the shit.

I am not saying that Christina Ricci had the same nipple-fate as this slut I knew, but she did have a breast reduction and her nipples are hard and that’s more than enough evidence for me. I guess my lack of attention to detail is the reason I am not a CSI. Here are the pics.

[ Images removed in compliance with DMCA Notice ]

Posted in:Christina Ricci|Nipples

2008

27

Aug

Miley Cyrus is Still Pretending She’s a Normal 15 Year Old of the Day

Last week I posted some pictures of Miley Cyrus on a Bike . I went on to say that it was all a scam by Disney who want to clean up her image and where older women stage bikini pictures, she’s going to have to stage some normal 15 year old activity pictures for the world to forget she’s a whore.

When I came across these pictures from the other day, I realized that I could have been a little quick to judge as I tend to be, and maybe she is just a 15 year old girl doing normal things. I mean I did sit in on an advertising class that year I pretended to go to college because of the pussy and I do remember the teacher saying that repetition is the key to getting it into the mind of the consumer, so maybe one of the Executives at Disney was in that class, which I doubt because it was a shitty Canadian community college, but it is possible and they are going to milk this acting 15 shit as long as they can until the public forget the last 6 months and are forced to remember her on her fuckin’ bike.

I guess it’s nice to see a 15 year old who has so much going for them, still down to earth, still living a balanced life and these bike riding pictures are a nice balance to her sucking off three black dudes while fisting her best friend Leslie who said “she’s just being Miley” last night, at least that’s what sources close to her emailed me saying she was up to before re-attaching the seat to this bike she’s riding and takin’ it out for some Pizza!!! Yay Pizza.

Posted in:15|Miley Cyrus|Slut

2008

27

Aug

Julia Roberts is in a Bikini of the Day

Everyone has those days where they feel like they look like shit. In Julia Roberts’ case, she’s actually got a reason to, because she does look like shit. I mean all the movie magic, make up, body doubles in the world can’t make her something I’d ever want to have sex with when sober, booze on the other hand makes me do a lot of things I regret and the fact that her womb is worth millions, kinda counterbalances the fact that she’s busted.

Lucky her, the paparazzi were there to snap off these pictures of her in a bikini, normally the only time a guy looks at her in a bikini is when she writes a check to the dude she promised an exuberant life of luxury to under the condition that he knocked her up

It is beyond me when she was such a big deal in the 90s, I have no idea how this homely cow went from rags to the highest paid actress in her time, but I can only assume her blowjob is spectacular, because it is really the only way.

Posted in:Bikini|Julia Roberts

2008

27

Aug

Heidi Montag Plays With Melons of the

Heidi Montag went fake grocery shopping with her fake nose and her fake tits and her fake boyfriend to help perpetuate their fake life together as real people, in real situations, living a real life and doing real life things and I don’t fuckin’ buy it. What I do buy is that Heidi posing with watermelons is meant to be funny because in all the time I have gone to the grocery store, which is a lot since I have a fat fucking wife who only likes eating or doing eating related activities like buying food to eat later, I have never seen anyone posing like this cry for attention of a girl. I’d wonder what went wrong in her life, like did she get enough attention from her parents growing up or was she the black sheep, did she get a lot of attention from boys or was she the Ugly Betty but less Mexican, but I don’t really care enough to. I find her ugly, useless and this is my weak attempt to make you hate her, the show they are on and the lies they are feeding our kids, because I want them off the air and back in whatever suburban town they crawled out of….

Posted in:Heidi Montag|Melons

2008

27

Aug

Kelly Osbourne Was Out of Line of the Day

I can think of a few reasons why someone would beat Kelly Osborne up, the main one being frustration that the girl you are dating looks like a fat fuckin’ teenaged boy who eats too many chips because they are his only friends before realizing life sucks and making his way to the local department store to buy a trench coat to wear when he school shoots all the bullies and popular kids. Waking up to a bitch that looks like that is pretty much all the convincing you need that your life fuckin’ sucks, you are worthless and you should give the fuck up, but when you can’t find a way to leave her because she pays your rent, you find a way to stomach her disgustingness, but as time goes on you realize that she’s a spoiled brat with an attitude that is almost as shitty as the smell of her sweaty, and doesn’t shut the fuck up and as every day goes buy, your fuse slowly gets shorter and shorter, snapping at the littlest things she does, until one day slammin her in the head for telling you that she loves you. Unfortunately, being a fat teenaged boy who cuts herself, being beat by her boyfriend makes her wet that someone would care enough to get physically abusive, when all the other guys just never called back and that makes her want to fuck you, leaving you back where you started because when you land a fat chick, or a fat chick lands you, there’s no escape, they won’t let you out, even if you try to spousal abuse your way out. Trust me.

I guess the black eye could have happened at an all you can eat buffet accident, or maybe in some prescription drug related accident, but I like to think it’s a man trying to teach an ugly girl a lesson situation, but that’s just because it’s like porn to me and I have a one-track mind and that track is the porn track…pretty much the best track around…so if you’re like me, you’ll appreciate these pictures.

Posted in:Black Eye|Kelly Osbourne

2008

27

Aug

Kate Bowsworth Lookin’ Hot of the Day

I had an argument with some chick who told me Kate Bowsworth was the hottest celebrity out there. I wasn’t sure who she was because she’s pretty much a no name and I kept using that as the basis of my argument that she in no way is the hottest celebrity because she’s not even a celebrity, before realizing this conversation was on the same level as giving girls in my eighth grade class a number rating with my group of loser friends who could never get up inside the girls we were givin’ 7s to and tried to divert the conversation to her vagina. You know ask her things about it that sound profound but are really my way to get details on what it looks like. It’s a philosophical approach that always tricks college girls. I ask if questions like “if your vagina was a country, what would it be” or “if your vagina was a hat what would it look like” then I bust out a porn mag and ask them to point out the vagina that looks most like theirs and it is always a fuckin’ dealbreaker.

The point of all this is to say, here’s the hottest Kate Bowsworth pic I’ve ever seen, maybe the chick I was talking to was right.

Posted in:Hot|Kate Bowsworth