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2008

08

Sep

stepLINKS of the Day

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I was bored, it’s getting cold and shitty here, and I was craving to see some real live girls in bikinis. The only place I knew where to find girls in bathing suits was at the YMCA because I had a free pass and they have a pool. So I got there and put on my bathing suit while knowing that I was probably a hugely offensive sight to the resident swimmers but I quickly discovered that being fat and hairy and not deserving of a bathing suit access was pretty fucking common theme at the YMCA pool. I saw some big, old, sagging asses and one chick had the nerve to wear a one piece white suit that was see through when wet so i could make out her saucer sized nipples and small porno bush that I guess she got crafted for her 30th wedding anniversary or some shit and it turns out that hot girls who look good in bikinis don’t spend their time at the local community pool to stay fit, but really old, disgusting ladies do and that in and of itself would have been a deal breaker if I wasn’t such a fucking pervert with no standars and I was just happy that I got to see girls in bathing suits even if they were girls that no one else in the world would ever want to see clothed and I feel lucky for that. Here are my links.

Shauna Sand is Disgusting
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Jayde Nicole is Pretty in Pink
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The Spiderman DVD Trailer
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More VMA Whoredom is Right Here.
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Paris Hilton Panty Upskirt
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The Horniest Vampires in Movie History
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Tony Versus Paul
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Some Things Never Change, and I Like That
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You Just Can’t Go Wrong With Cheerleaders, Can You?
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How Is It That Japan Can Make Even Diarreah Amazing?
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Keira Knightley Needs to Eat Some Fucking Food
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Solve Your Case of the Mondays
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Man, Thos Football Players Really Know How to Get Themselevs in Trouble
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How Can Lighting Your Pants on Fire EVER Be Considered a Good Idea
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Jessica Simposon’s Newly Country Tits Perform at the Grande Ol’ Opry
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Rollerman’s Breakneck Speeds
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Squirel Launch Part 2
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Who Says There’s No Such Thing as REAL Sluts Anymore?
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I’m No Prude, But Am I the Only One Who Sees a Problem With Small Children Playing on a Penis Slide?
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Some Vintage Sarah Palin
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Best Dressed At the VMAs
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Anna Kournikova Goodness
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And That’s Why You Don’t Ride Bulls
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Jelly Wrestling!! Heyo!
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Work Out that Fails
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I Gotta Get Myself Down to Florida, Like NOW
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Whoa Nelly!
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Some Oasis Video of them Getting Attacked On Stage Cuz They Suck
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Bar Rafaeli Can Do No Wrong
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Find Girls To Fuck, Virgin
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God Damn Halle Berry is Looking Good!
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Jennifer Aniston Takes Her Washed Up Ass to Toronto
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More From the Lingerie Bowl
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Striptease of the Day
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Idiot Shoots Himself in the Nuts
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Uhhhh…Keep Telling Yourself That, Sweetheart
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Get Some Sex Today! Why Not?
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Chloe Dior! Oh My!
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Paula Garces is the Throwback of the Day
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Introducing the Apple Twins
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And Now, The Mini-Me Sex Tape
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One of The Homos From Oasis Got Attacked on the Weekend
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90210 Catfight!
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Way to Go, Fatty
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Okay, I Admit It. Will Smith Has Amused Me
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Gary Coleman is a Fucking Nut and I Love It
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Carla Goes For a Swing
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Some Scary Religious Senator Clip
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Open a Beer Bottle With a Dollar Bill
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Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

08

Sep

Lindsay Lohan Supports Her Lesbian’s Sister’s Clothing Line Fashion Show With Her Big Tits of the Day

Lindsay Lohan is a good lesbian, she doesn’t wear bras anymore, despite having massive tits, which is something I’m into right now, but won’t be when she’s a 40 year old lesbian and not just a 21 year old lesbian who looks 40, with tits that hang down to her gut who and who doesn’t wear bras, has a shaved head, rocks some flannel and some construction boots and who loves getting fucked with Dolphin shaped dildoes because penis is the fucking enemy, not that I’ll be alive, or that Lohan will still be a dyke then, but you get what I am saying, even though I don’t.

She stood by her girlfriend at her girlfriends sister’s fashion show proving that this relationship is a good publicity stunt for the whole family, not that she’s actually in a relationship, it’s all just speculation and lies and that pisses me off, so until I see a video of them going lickin’ each other’s assholes, I don’t buy this for a second and will just think of this whole Lohan Ronson thing is a bad joke, because those bitches are playing the media probably a lot harder than they are playing each other’s vaginas.

Speaking of bad jokes, I was stuck on a bus the other day because I wanted to visit a friend of mine who lived outside of town and I don’t have a car. I didn’t realize that there was some kind of construction going on that turned this 30 minute ride into a 2 hour long painful experience, I was sitting in front of some dude who was with some really busty skinny chick who I assume was his girlfriend. The entire ride he kept making bad jokes and observations of shit going on while trying to drop his one liners that were fuckin’ killing me. Every time he would speak, I’d just shake my head in disapproval. He said shit like “what’s a surfer say when he has diarrhea? Squirts Up” and the hot chick he was with would just laugh and laugh….he said shit like “What’s a Chinese guy’s favorite kind of tea? Kar-a-tea” and she was roaring, while I knew that a Chinese person’s favorite tea was Green Tea, thanks to all it’s healing properties and just wanted to punch him in the face for being a fuckin’ loser and cunt punch his girl for humoring him just to see what her box felt like.

I guess that doesn’t matter, but here are those pics of Lohan who is showing off her tits and according to rumors, knows exactly what Sam Ronson’s box feels like.

Bonus that’s Not Really a Bonus – Lohan at the VMA red carpet, lookin’ pretty fuckin’ horrible.

Posted in:Lesbian|Lindsay Lohan|Tits|Uncategorized

2008

08

Sep

Vanessa Hudgens And Her American Apparel Leggings Trying to Be Hot of the Day

I don’t find Vanessa Hudgens hot, especailly not in these spandex leggings and I guess it’s because she ruined that whole mystery that made her somewhat appealing by wondering what she looks like naked by releasing naked pictures of herself on the Internet. Now all I see is some ethnic lookin’ muppet acting like an asshole on stage, knowing that her scandal was the key to this whole virginity movement that bores me because I won’t get the chance to see these fuckers fuck up because they are too concerned about their careers and their contracts, i wish I had the same level of ambition because then maybe this site would be worth reading, but instead I am just going to go take a nap.

Posted in:Vanessa Hudgens|VMAS

2008

08

Sep

Rihanna Lookin’ Hot When Performing at the VMAs of the Day

I was at a club this past weekend drinking like I do. It was some open bar party that I managed to work my way into and when inside, I got to talking to some dude about smoking weed, and how the girls in this place were all drunk and wanted to get fucked. A Rihanna song came on, since she’s pretty much killin’ the music industry and is on the top of her game, despite not being a very good singer or a very hot bodied black chick, but I still think she deserves it because all her songs are catchy and hits that everyone can get down to.

Either way, this chick who looked and dressed like Rihanna jumped onto a table and started doing Rihanna choreographed dance moves that she obviously learned watching her music videos and as she danced away, people started watching the spectacle and formed a bit of an audience around her because from far away she looked just like Rihanna and we didn’t know if we were in a celebrity party or if this girl was just a fuckin’ rip off artist who was loving all the attention….

When the song ended and she got off her table and everyone clapped for her, which I thought was ridiculous, considering how creepy it is to pretend you are someone famous to feel better about yourself when people clap and grandmas ask for autographs so I decided to walk up to her and entertain her shit. She gave me pure fuckin’ attitude and when the guy I met who loved weed asked for a picture she said something like “I don’t do photos” and I laughed in her face, because that kind of attitude from someone who is just copying someone famous because she thinks she’s actually important and has some kind of ego like she’s a celebrity and not just some shitty stripper or whatever the fuck she does to pay her bills is funny….what isn’t funny is the fact that I still wanted to fuck her but knew I’d never see her naked, not even with promises of featuring her on this website because she was too caught up in thinking she was famous while the real Rihanna was at the VMAs and here are the pics….

Bonus Here She Is With T.I. in Tight Pants

Here She is Arriving to the Show

Posted in:Hot|Rihanna|VMA

2008

08

Sep

Michael Phelps Grabbing Some Ass of the Day

Michael Phelps is some hip hop fan who can now live out his dream of being gangster hustling chicks and not feel like the awkward weird lookin’ guy he is, because girls are sluts and if you are on TV, no matter how wonky lookin’ you are, you’ll still have no issue getting laid and living the hip hop dream, flossin’ his ice after melting down his 8 gold medals into an Olympic Grill and here he is at the Playboy club grabbin’ some random girl’s ass because he can and because every slut wants his water logged dick up inside them and the truth is that I am surprised Phelps can even walk around as easily as he does, I heard that the American government hasn’t let him out of the pool for the last 12 years he’s been training to be the freak that he is….but then againg I have no idea what I am talking about…..but I do know the girl in the green bikini is dumpy as fuck….enjoy…

Posted in:Ass|Grabbing|Michael Phelps

2008

08

Sep

Pink’s Nipple Tape at the VMAs of the Day

I hate saying this, but Pink looked good at the VMAs. Maybe it’s because she’s lost her husband and is lookin’ for new cock, or maybe because she was the bread winner in her household when she was married and when he left her has since decided to take off her pants and be a girl again or something, I just don’t know, but I do know that I was feeling her performance, despite the song being a little too personal and awkward to listen to, like the time I got stuck in a doctor’s office with a male stripper who went off about how he isn’t gay but how he lets guys fuck him for money if he’s on enough drugs and that he was at the Doctor’s office for some lump they found growing in his neck that could be AIDS, making me not want to be the one sitting next to him in one of those real “too much information” situations that is actually too much information and not just some white person over-using the “too much information” expression like they do when you tell them shit like that you are constipated or that you haven’t jerked off in a month or that the first time you had anal sex, you got shit on your dick, or whatever it is that white people say “too much information” to, when you aren’t even telling them too much infomation and are just trying to make conversation…..

You get what I mean….and I don’t get why I was into Pink last night, but here are some pics to celebrate.

Posted in:Nipple|Performance|Pink|Topless

2008

08

Sep

Christina Aguilera at the VMAs of the Day

As Christina Aguilera was asked about motherhood and Lily Allen stood off camera crying to herself about what could have been if only her uterus was strong enough to withstand her self-destructive lifestyle, her tits remained ridiculous. I don’t really know what’s going on with Aguilera or whether she’s had a lot of plastic surgery done or not, but I do know that she looks a hell of a lot different that she used to and a hell of a lot more like a tacky bitch you’d see working at a tanning salon in some cleavage exposing outfit and I guess there’s nothing gay about that, what is gay is that you are at the fucking tanning salon, are you lookin’ for an even tan so that you look good in your new Ed Hardy T-shirt when you go to the club to buy bottles of Grey Goose, because everyone knows that it’s only masculine for a guy to have a tan if he got it doing something tough, like being stranded on a deserted island and forced to fend for himself, or if he got it raping and killing a small tropical village or some shit, but that doesn’t matter, what does matter is Aguilera’s cleavage from last night….

Posted in:Christina Aguilera|VMAS

2008

08

Sep

Katy Perry and Miley Cyrus in a Lesbian Pedophile Fantasy of the Day

So Katy Perry is doing all that she can to hold onto this fame that she’s unfortunately got for a song that I can’t fucking stand and she’s doing it by hanging out with Miley Cyrus, giving us all some Lesbian Pedophile fantasies we’d get arrested for if we tried to play shit out with a couple girls we meet at the bus station on video. Now I can’t stand either of these sluts because they come to the party that is my life uninvited, on TV or on the Radio or pretty much anywhere I am and that makes me fuckin’ hate them. They are thrown down my fuckin’ throat and all I see is talentless shit that don’t deserve to be where they are, but I don’t have the power to make them go away, so I’ll just stare at Katy Perry’s fat tits and fat stomach in her stupid outfit while thinkin’ about Miley Cyrus’ virginity being a thing of the past.

At last night’s awards, Russel Brand, who I think was in over his head but still a decent host because he’s got a funny way about him and who I like since seeing him live and realizing he’s a definite talent, played it kinda safe. He was ripping into the Jonas brother’s about their promise rings and how they don’t do the pussy being thrown at them because they are contractually not allowed to and he made fun of this whole virginity lie the media is feeding our youth. Then Jordin Sparks from American Idol and Rich Daddy who paid for her career and all the junk food that made her this way came out saying it’s better to be a virgin than a slut, because that’s what she tells herself every night when she finds herself crying after masturbating because no one wants her Gorilla lookin’ body and instead of Russel Brand tearing her apart he came out and back tracked on his promise ring shit he was using to carry him through the show and said it’s okay to be a virgin and it’s commedable, and that kind of pussy footing pisses me off, but I guess dude’s just trying to make it in America without making enemies but was still fuckin’ weak on his part…..because the entire world knows this promise ring, God shit is a lie and that girls like Miley Cyrus give better blowjobs than a pornstar because they are eager, bright eyed and their daddy taught them proper back when they lived on the farm or some shit….

Either way, here are those pictures….

Bonus That’s Not Really a Bonus – Katy Perry and Her Annoying Lesbian Attention Whore Tits at Some Party of the Day

Posted in:Katy Perry|Miley Cyrus|VMAS

2008

08

Sep

Jamie Lynn Sigler’s Flashes Her Vagina of the Day

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Here’s some Meadow Soprano showing off her own little well maintained meadow and by well maintained meadow I mean her Jewish pussy at some fashion show. I don’t really know if these pictures are old or not, but I do know that they are comin’ in a few years too late because I don’t really have any interest in getting off to her now that she’s all reformed, not that I ever really wanted to get off to her, but there was a time when I would have been a lot more excited to see her cooch. That time was when I thought she was some Italian girl with low self esteem and an eating disorder in her late teens, and not some whiney Jewish girl with low self esteem and an eating disorder that she turned out to be and now she’s done gone grown up, has become some expert on eating disorders just because she had one and talks to girls in schools about that shit and writes books about that shit even though every rich Jewish teenager has eating disorders but at least she’s out flashin’ that cunt.

Speaking of Jewish Vagina, I used to know a guy who would only date Jewish girls. He thought they were the hottest fucking thing ever and he’d always tell us stories of how he would ravage them in the bedroom and treat them like pure shit behind closed doors and how they liked it. He would say all kinds of anti semetic things and they’d just swoon over him like he was some kind of god, probably because they knew their parents wouldn’t approve. He’d always get them hooked on him, but never considered them human enough to fall in love with and would drop them like last week’s kitchen garbage when he was done with them, seriously fucking them up and ruining all future relationships for them and that’s why we used to call him Hitler…..

Hilter or not, her junk is not some kind of mangled fleshy mess that looks like a human science experiement that went down in Nazi Germany, like so many vagina look like and that I still don’t descriminate against, like the other day when this Jamaican dude pulled out his cellphone and showed me a picture of the weirdest pussy I had ever seen, shit’s clit was bigger than my dick and looked like it was giving me the thumbs up and I had to keep my cool and pretend it was all good, because they were pictures of his wife and I figure throwing up at a picture of a man’s wife’s vagina is a good way to get beat down, so it’s nice to see she’s got a hot little coinslot, because it’s pretty rare, I have written enough, just look at the pics.

Posted in:flash|Jamie Lynn Sigler|Uncategorized|Vagina

2008

08

Sep

Britney Spears Owned the VMAs of the Day

Britney Spears dominated the VMAs and I missed her opening act because I was trying to get to my friend’s house to watch the shit and got distracted along the way. He said it was with the dude from Superbad or someshit and that it was kinda funny, but I am too lazy to look for it because my state issued therapist told me that I need to learn how to let go of the past and move on….

I did see her win 2 or 3 awards and the entire time she sounded sane, medicated and polite. I guess her management is serious about getting her back into the scene and have trained her properly to be normal and as each award came, her manager and exloiter, Larry Rudolph got more and more excited as he say the balance in his bank account get bigger and bigger.

She looked better than she has in a while but still needs to hit the gym for another 6 months and despite not being excited about her comeback, I don’t really care, I just liked her better when she was crazy, unwashed and exposing her body parts to the world because she didn’t give a fuck. Playing it safe is boring, embracing your insanity is exciting because you never know what you are going to get and crazy chicks are like porn to me. Either way, here are ssome pics of Britney.

Posted in:Britney Spears|Uncategorized|VMA

2008

08

Sep

stepLINKS of the Day

I know I am a little late on posting these stepLINKS but I was traveling to a tropical resort, where a hot, tight bodied 18 year old wouldn’t stop asking me to rub tanning oil on her bare tits and by traveling to a tropical resort with a hot bodied topless chick, I mean my internet connection was down and it’s barely back up now, but I’m doing the best I can with what I’ve got, which isn’t much but the dreams of a better place than here where I don’t need the internet to update stupid links you don’t even click on because you hate me, heartbreaker.

That said, here are my links.

Lily Allen Can Be Quite the Cunt When She Wants to Be
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The Only Good Thing About Skatboarding in When They Bail
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Tara Reid’s Old Lady Tits Are Really Getting Irrelevant
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Some Lingerie Football League….Worth Checking Out….
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Who Knew Midgets Could Make Watching a Piece of Shit Like Entourage Bearable?
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Aline Samy Would Be Totally Bangable if She Put a Fucking Bag Over Her Head
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Milo Ventimiglia is Having a Cry
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Who Says It’s Hard to Find a Girlfriend?
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Pussy Cat dDoll Nip Slip
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The 10 Worst Inventions Ever
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Watch This Jet Break the Sound Barrier
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Friday Night Slut Fest
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Base Jump Gone Wrong
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Emma Streadman Gallery
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Evening Dress Strippers
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Busty, Busty Peaches
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Everyone is Getting All Political on Paris Hilton’s Ass
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Hey Vicky Beckham! What the Fuck is Wrong With Your Skin?
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Feed Your Porn Addiction
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Michael Phelpsis the Ass King
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EPIC Motorcycle Fail
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No One Said Shooting a Guy is Easy
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Serial Killer Fun
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The Pussycat Dolls in Blender Magazine
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Mariah Carey Whores It Up Around Town
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Striptease of the Day
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Been There, Done That
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VMA Whoredom
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And That’s Why You Don’t Stand Next to a Falling Tree
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Goth Girl Gets Pierced
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Get Sex This Weekend
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I Drunk
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Lesbian Tendancies Promote the New 90210
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Sexy Random Photo Fun
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Rosie Jones is Topless
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Josh Hartnett Hotel Library Sex Tape
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Kanye West Has No Shame
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Some Things Even Shock the Helpp Out of Me
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Extreme Ping Pong
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The Flying Squirrel!
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Hello Heather Rae
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How To: Eat 48 Hot Dogs in Ten Minutes
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

05

Sep

Hilary Duff Shows Off Her Legs of the Day

All pictures of Hilary Duff pretty much look the same. So these could be old since I feel like I’ve seen them 100 times before. You know her in shorts showing off her 5 foot 2 body and I think she looks pretty good at it despite hating her and everything she stands for, not that I know what she stands for, but I do know that she is standing and these pictures would probably be better if she was on all fours.

There ya go, that’s my typical lame one-liner post that you can find on all the other sites because it’s Friday afternoon, I don’t care to put effort into story tellin, I’ve been doing it all week and no one reads my shit so why fucking bother. I don’t know when these pics were taken and I am not a credible news source but I am pretty much ready to peace the fuck out and hang outside local high schools pretending I am picking up my daughter, when in reality I’m just window shopping. I’ll be back later with the stepLINKS if my internet still works. Cuddles (motherfucker)!

Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

05

Sep

Kristin Cavallari is Drunk of the Day

People and by people I mean one person has been asking for more Kristin Cavallari, the bitch from Laguna Beach who opted out of the spin-off that unfortunately turned out to be the biggest fucking thing on TV unfortunately. I realize I said unfortunately twice because the one thing I can relate toKristin Cavallari on is that we both want to kill ourselves because of The Hills. Sure I want to kill myself because everytime I come across the lies and people talking about the lies and the ugly people perpetuating the lies of that show, it makes me hate society, while Kristin Cavallari is probably realizing she missed her meal ticket by being a cunt who thought she was bigger and better than a spin off show that would ruin her fictitious career she thought she was going to have after Laguna Beach cuz of ego, while it would have been the biggest payout of her career.

So while Heidi is out there making millions and Kristin is a talentless thing of the past, who just didn’t know her worth as a piece of shit fake reality star, and she’s drinking her sorrows away to deal with it, but the truth is, it is probably a better life than being Heidi Montag….but then again being a retarded castrated deaf, blind, mute with a terminal illness and a skin disorder that makes you itch and burn all the time with no control over your bladder ever since the accident that left you a quadruple amputee and you still are lucky to not be Heidi Montag. She is that bad.

Posted in:Drunk|Kristin Cavallari

2008

05

Sep

Kim Kardashian is a Fat Pig in Gogo Boots Shopping of the Day

Drunkenstepfather.com supports eating disorders. Kim Kardashian doesn’t.

This bitch looks hefty as fuck when shopping for new clothes because she outgrew her old wardrobe because overeating and being a lazy bitch does that do you. These pics may be old but who really cares…she always looks the same…

Posted in:Fat|Kim Kardashian|Uncategorized

2008

05

Sep

Halle Berry’s Got Some Big Tits of the Day

I was walking down the street and saw a group of highschool girls in highschool uniforms gossiping like the bitches they looked like. They were going off about how one of them got an abortion and how she’s such a slut for not telling them and I had no choice but to stop and listen because it was really fuckin’ hot, what isn’t hot is the fact that Halle Berry didn’t have an abortion, but at least she has tits to show for her disgusting pregnancy..

Posted in:Halle Berry|Tits