DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2025

16

May

Bella Thorne Does Bikini Content of the Day

Bella Throne is the horny celebrity who did the whole OnlyFans at a time when it inspired normies to do OnlyFans….so in a lot of ways, she’s a real fucking hero in the mainstream-ification of the whole normie becoming whore thing….

That’s turned out to be very important for everyone involved in that industry because money is being made heavy….

She’s apparently re-doing Springbreakers with Harmony Korine, which is his Magnus Opus in terms of serious commercial success.

We don’t know if it’s a NEW Spring Break in a world that doesn’t Spring Break since the whores are always on Vacation….or if she is taking on the role of Ashley Benson, Korine’s child-bride, or Selena Gomez…

WHO KNOWS….but Thorne in all her girth is in a bikini being girthy…

Posted in:Bella Thorne

2025

16

May

What Kind of Animal is This of the Day

No Comments »

I always fancied myself to be one of those action and adventuring documentarian.

The kind of motherfucker who goes deep into the wilderness to uncover new species of birds or rodents.

Just me and my National Geographic membership, a camera and a keen eye for the natural world.

Instead, I became a drunken idiot who never got my sit together and decided that sitting on the internet when I am not drinking is the best use of my time…

At a time, digging through the depths of the internet for weird and strange discoveries, before TikTok and Instagram did it for the people because it generated clicks.

Observing some weirdness and documenting it in the laziest of ways with a blog post for you….

Well, today, those two worlds collided and we’ve discovered a new species of animal….on the internet…without leaving the couch and I’m here to document it.

Where’s my Nobel Prize, Pulitzer, whatever the fuck you get for discovering these kinds of things…

Posted in:Videos

2025

16

May

Street Busker of the Day

1 Comment »

Homeless people are pretty entertaining when they aren’t the lazy kind.

I have been seeing a lot of do-nothing crackheads begging for money on the streets. These homeless encampments are everywhere.

Put them to work.

Maybe it’s my inner plantation owner fetish, where I always think that the homeless make for good talent for various projects. Cheap labor.

Whether it’s porn or bum fights, they are desperate for money so put them to work.

I also get mad when I find out the homeless refugee woman begging for change are actually not homeles and securing 5000 tax free dollars from the government each month, immigration policies are crazy.

I don’t get mad when they take it upon themselves to deep throat some balloons…

Be inspired by this OF chick pretending to be a BUSKER….BUSKER COSPLAY motherfucker…

Posted in:Videos

2025

15

May

Sofia Vergara Ass in Dress of the Day

17 Comments »

Sofia Vergara may not be a drug mule being used by the cartel to smuggle fentanyl into America….but her dumper looks like the kind of place I’d want to store anything I would be trying to smuggle…like my dick…if I had one…unfortunately, I’m more the kind of person who smuggles my own dick, never to have it noticed….and I was just saying that I want to smuggle my dick in Sofia Vergara’s ass as a figure of speech.

Anyway, she is old and has a fat ass to go with her fat tits.

Primarily known for her fat tits, what we’d assume helped her rise to the TV screen from the depths of undocumented immigrant in the Visa line in Miami…to a household name…but we always forget that she probably also used her ass…

Whether it was pushing back on a decision maker, twerking it the right Latin-Nights way, or just letting those execs experience the dick smuggling fetish I was discussing earlier in todays post….

She’s probably used both to exist in this celebrity world…and she continues to use it, with the green tight dress she’s too old for, while creepy geriatric Simon Cowell looks like he’s in need of some Teen Pop Boy Band Semen to liven his near dead look up..

Posted in:Sofia Vergara

2025

15

May

Nina Dobrev’s Cameltoe of the Day

No Comments »

I don’t know when this video is from, but Nina Dobrev has an epic Cameltoe and that makes it a timeless classic.

This is some Eastern European architecture that survived the Russian Revolution and the Fall of Communism, in full pussy eating tight pants form.

She is an Eastern European Refugee, which to the racists is the good kind of refugee, because she brings her Eastern European genetics to their country to breed with….

Eastern European and South African refugees have proven to be some of the least favorite refugees to the Libtards in recent days because they don’t find them brown or Indian enough…bringing in Hot Chicks, which should be the ONLY kind of refugee, somehow lost it’s place of importance in the immigration game.

However, Canada, we still have a lot of Ukraine babes making their 6000 dollars per month tax free that they get paid.

Canada is where Nina came through and used as a passthrough before landing in the USA.

So her tax dollars go to you not to us, but with that body, the one where the fat pussy eats the pants like it’s working for an Oligarch…should make you want to import your own Eastern European to re-populate with their stronger survivor of communist genes.

She is not in jeans, but she does have strong genes, because the mid 30 actress who fled communism for socialism in Canada before saying fuck that “I’ll pay my taxes in America for Freedom instead”…. is in tight pants…

Those tight pants are severely hugging that war torn pussy.

Check it out…

Posted in:Nina Dobrev

2025

15

May

Brie Larson’s Cancer Survival Haircut of the Day

No Comments »

Get another shot Brie Larson….that’s what I say to everyone I see with an obvious ailment, limp, cancer, or chemo hair.

I forgot that Brie Larson existed over the last year or more, it was a glorious time, because being reminded that average low level talent can manipulate an entire industry and command huge pay days is discouraging, especially when they aren’t hot….

Then there was the whole marketing the nerd 40 year old to us like she was hot, which made the whole thing even weirder and more disappointing for humanity.

Apparently, she was out there beating cancer, her hair growing back in, her body ravaged, now looking like an old lady retired at the trailer park after a career working for the city at the library or as some low level admin, but now with pension in hand and good medical, she can take her life by the balls and safely join a pickleball league…

Larson is dog shit. She looks like dog shit and she acts like dog shit, she probably smells like dog shit, therefore she is dog shit….

Check it out….

Posted in:Brie Larson

2025

15

May

Joey King is on the Table in a Bikini Top of the Day

No Comments »

It’s safe to assume that Joey King is at some satanic ritual that helped shape her into the celebrity that she is.

Without those satanic rituals where they eat babies and other humans as part of their sex cult fuel, this bitch would be working at Starbucks, possibly taking selfies to post to reddit between classes at community college where she studies Women’s Studies or some other useless degree that may get her a low level marketing job.

She’s a nerd…but they want you to think she’s hot, so bikini tops contribute to that messaging….just not so much when she’s on her back, on a table, like a novelty act at a bachelor party about to get sushi eaten off her titties, or a prostitute the satanic cult is about to slaughter and eat as part of their elite programming before the sex….

Posted in:Joey King

2025

15

May

Kendall Jenner Lesbian Sister Fucker in the Caribbean of the Day

No Comments »

Kendall Jenner and her sister are probably tax evaders like other rich people, but instead of the Bahamas like Tom Brady and her sister and instead of Puerto Rico like she was Jake Paul Brothers, they’ve landed in Turks and Caicos….

Along with tax evasion, the sisters also wrestle on the beach in bikinis, which is foreplay in some lesbian sex scenarios, because when girls are molested together, they end up finding comfort in fucking each other…

Whether the Jenners were molested or not isn’t our business, we just hear stories about how fucking weird the rich Hollywood types, and their family, secure that with the dad chopping the dick off and putting it inside out, to make it into a pussy modelled after his girls, which is some kind of fucked up…

Posted in:Kendall Jenner

2025

15

May

Good Mother Emily Ratajkowski in a Photoshoot of the Day

No Comments »

It’s insane to me that Emily Ratajkowski is cast to be in fashionable photoshoot.

From where I am sitting all day, every day, until I eventually lose my feet to diabetes, the girl was destined to be cast in photoshoots that involve inserting things in her asshole and at this stage in the game she’d be the aged version of that porn chick trying to make money to pay the rent.

Instead, she is cast in photoshoots that don’t involve inserting things in her asshole, they actually involve her pretending to be fancy and European….

It is like she is a respectable, respected, appreciated, like she is a natural beauty who is seen as an icon in fashion and influencing, when there’s very little natural or respectable about her.

Don’t get me wrong, I respect her use of the big tits for her marketing.

I just don’t think that big tits are that great of a thing to justify her being seen as this premium level of talent for brands to use to market their products.

No matter how many hits the big tits get, or how good her shameless self promotion of those tits has been, it’s weird that the high profile opportunities that came her way when all she was was a girl willing to get naked in pictures….like a low hanging fruit porn chick with no other option by tits to make money.

Seeing her being thoughtful, fashionable, trying to be classy is some real cosplay – isn’t it.

She did it right, makes no sense to me, but who the fuck cares what I think or my opinion on anything, check out her tits…

Posted in:Em Rat Cow

2025

15

May

Theo Vonn’s Hot Date with Ivanka Trump of the Day

No Comments »

The cuck libtard freaky communists of the world may hate Trump and everything he does or says, because they are sucking on the tit of Whoopi Goldberg or other retards in the media who get views hating on Trump.

But they can’t hate his daughter…

They probably do hate his daughter, I remember the hate she would get during his first presidency, but even worse in the 2020 election when all the weird liberals who are genderless, cutting off their dicks and addicted to jerking off to step family porn by sticking objects in their ass, when they aren’t petting their cats, or watching Anime while drinking Monster energy drink and eating processed Soya based foods….. because they are fucking destroyed by this phase in humanity….

They would call Trump a pervert for his daughter and not one of them, despite all the incest porn they watched, would say “I would be too, check out those legs”…

The rage for Trump has got to be retarded level highs, if the incest porn demographic gets mad at Trump for incest, instead of turned on.

Especially when Ivanka looks like this….

Now, I’ve always been a Trump and Ivanka fan, I remember reading Art of the Deal in the 80s, I watched Celebrity Apprentice and the Apprentice in the 00s, and his well-put together daughter, all business-like and not a Paris Hilton level party slut, was inspiring….even though both hustled business their own way, and both made fortunes of Kim Kardashian’s back…or her taking it from the back.

Ivanka’s husband is the main investor in SKIMS and SKIMS makes billions….

Now her husband, like other rich guys, may also be a cuck, because he’s on a throuple date with Theo Vonn, the world’s number 1 podcaster to those who listen to Podcasts.

I do not listen to Podcasts, despite my early appreciation for radio….but I do know Theo Vonn is your only hope.

This is likely some high level business gathering to discuss how to make other billions, or to manipulate the minds of the Vonn listener with propaganda that skews towards MAGA and SKIMS….

Maybe Vonn is launching his own line of MAGA SKIMS….because Kim K can’t admit she’s a trump supporter, her audience who don’t realize she’s a fraud will feel betrayed…

Since this is the porn generation and people only understand references to porn, we’ll run with cuck date before the storm on some HOT WIFE shit….since Ivanka is a hot wife..

Posted in:Ivanka Trump