I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2016

15

Nov

Jewel is in a Bikini of the Day

jewel

Jewel is in a bikini and has big tits…which is probably something that came in handy when she lived in her van – and drove down to Hollywood all broke as fuck before becoming an international love song singing success….because big tits get you paid….

I never believed her story of her in the 90s playing music in Alaskan coffee houses – before choosing the nomad life, driving to Hollywood – where she was found and signed….especially based on her tits alone….

I just think it makes a better story when selling her to the people, and the reality is that someone heard her demo in a pre-social media world…and she did drive down from Alaska….and she was actually a van dweller – borderline homeless chick – because she’s one of those 90s hippies who didn’t wear shoes and went tree planting during the summers…because it seemed to have artistic merit…you know it tied into her music….but with big tits like that…you know…there’s more to the story….because I don’t know much – but I do know the power of big tits….and the lie that is the music industry….not that it matters…

What matters is that she posts bikini photos at 40 to her social media – all mom body all the time because she knows what got her here….and it wasn’t that van…if you know what I mean.

Posted in:Jewel|SFW

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!