When you’re a total fucking pervert who gets very little from girls in your everyday life…whether it is because you made the mistake of getting married to your high school sweetheart, or married some girl you met on some online video game because you lack social skills, or married because you just couldn’t handle being alone so you went for the first thing that came your way…or you’re alone because you’re just a creeper who no one talks to…you can find sex in anything you look at…and the more desperate you get, the deeper you go down that dark road, the more things like a girl sucking a straw becomes erotic enough for you to lock yourself in the bathroom to jerk off to…even when the straw being sucked is by an overweight Mexican with too much make up on…who you figure looks like Selena Gomez…if you know who Selena Gomez is..which I assume most of you do…but that most normal people not absorbed in this bullshit don’t fucking care…and really shouldn’t…she’s done nothing of substance, and that’s that.

All this to say, this is more interesting than Kim Kardashian’s second pregnancy, unless her second pregnancy ends with complications that leave her dead….

Posted in:Selena Gomez