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Archive for the Jessica Simpson Category

2024

15

Feb

Jessica Simpson’s Titty Comeback Tour of the Day

It’s fucking weird that 45 year olds look like this now, it’s actually really fucking disturbing to me, but vanity and technology have collided and bitches and do whatever they want to do to be as hot as they want to be, since the world likes hot things, no matter how much the troll lesbians try to tell you that hot is out and troll is in, no one actually believes that, especially not hot people.

I’m older than Jessica Simpson, but typically don’t really like to sexualize the over 30 crowd too hard, but in this case, those old mom tits must be celebrated even if it goes against my morals and values.

At 45 years old, she’s managed to slim the fuck down and when dolled up it’s not in a creepy as shit kind of way, you know all jacked and muscular like she’s ready to fucking wrestle or do meth down under the bridge….and she’s still got her huge rockin’ tits….

Not bad for a billionaire from selling shitty direct to consumer clothing vendor, who is also a WAG, the original Taylor Swift with Tony Romo, before breeding with some other player, popstar with NFL Dicks in her because she’s Jessica Simpson and has always had rockin’ tits.

None of this is as weird as her creepy gay father…who was creepier when we assumed he jerked off to her tits, but now that we know he jerks off to cock makes him less creepy, while still being pretty creepy….

Posted in:Jessica Simpson

2024

05

Jan

Jessica Simpson as Porno Granny of the Day

So I’m an old and out of touch motherfucker, so I don’t really know who the trending celebrities are besides Sydney Sweeney’s big tits, and really the whole concept of celebrity is dead, so why not remain a fucking dinosaur of the internet, who even at my peak of internet stardom, back when 10 people visited the site per day, I was totally out of fucking touch….by focusing on the people who were popular back when celebrity existed, except maybe for Lohan, she’d dead to me knowing she bred with someone other than me, when all she had to do is send an email and I would have emailed that vat of SEMEN I’ve been saving her for 15 years….

Anyway, in keeping up with being outdated fucks, here’s some Jessica Simpson looking like a porno granny, all jacked up on her DIABETES meds that made her skinny while keeping the big tits…..all jacked up on BOTOX and fillers to give her that bloated cum soaked porno face while still rocking the big tits.

Is this Pam Anderson? Or Madonna on tour at the old folks home soiling her diapers…no it’s the Country K-Mart fashion Billionaire with the big tits, who still has the big tits, which is what matters…

It’s all barely exciting….which is how I like things to be, my heart can’t handle actual excitement anymore.

Posted in:Jessica Simpson

2023

03

Nov

Jessica Simpson Posted her Pre Sober Crackhead Miss Piggy Pic for Attention of the Day

Jessica Simpson re-posted some picture of what she is calling herself in November 2017, that she reposted November 2021, and reposted again November 2023 because I guess she’s proud of herself.

She wrote a whole paragraph about the situation that I will post here, I just don’t believe that the original influencer selling shitty product to the masses of retards. I didn’t bother read it, but it is probably about how she was fat and drinking and hated herself because her gay dad was too hard on her and life as a billionaire with an ex-pro athlete husband and bay daddy is rough…there’s just too much food and drink for a fat texan to consume….

You can read it for me, I got other shit to do….I just look at pictures bro and this one looks like staged after school special production of crackwhore mom in the trailer park turns tricks for money.

This person in the early morning of Nov 1, 2017 is an unrecognizable version of myself. I had so much self discovery to unlock and explore. I knew in this very moment I would allow myself to take back my light, show victory over my internal battle of self respect, and brave this world with piercing clarity. Personally, to do this I needed to stop drinking alcohol because it kept my mind and heart circling in the same direction and quite honestly I was exhausted. I wanted to feel the pain so I could carry it like a badge of honor. I wanted to live as a leader does and break cycles to advance forward- never looking back with regret and remorse over any choice I have made and would make for the rest of my time here within this beautiful world.

I can’t believe it has been 4yrs! It feels like maybe 2. I think that is a good thing. Ha. There is so much stigma around the word alcoholism or the label of an alcoholic. The real work that needed to be done in my life was to actually accept failure, pain, brokenness, and self sabotage. The drinking wasn’t the issue. I was. I didn’t love myself. I didn’t respect my own power. Today I do. I have made nice with the fears and I have accepted the parts of my life that are just sad. I own my personal power with soulful courage. I am wildly honest and comfortably open. I am free.

I guess she is trying to compare and contrast the now less fat, less bloated, less puffy, 6 year older, made up, face injected, probably on Ozembpic or an over-exerciser who still has some tit, but who is old as shit and looks like a different person that that bus station dweller she’s celebrating the death of in that fat lady track suit….must have been hard to pull off with all her resources, like she hasn’t done it before when Weight Watchers paid her 1,000,000 dollars to do it. YOU Don’t impress me JESSICA.

I prefer the tranny, structured, near menopause Texas mom look to the more disgusting version of herself, and I guess she does too because she keeps shaming that pig and rubbing the new her in her face. What a bitch.

Posted in:Jessica Simpson

2022

12

Jul

Jessica Simpson and the Fisting Glove of the Day

I don’t pay attention to Jessica Simpson or her toned legs from carrying her fat ass around all those years before the multi-million dollar weight watchers deal, even though her big tits have brought some joy over the years back when she was famous, because big tits always bring joy, even the gross ones, because they are tits.

Well, the other he posted a bathing suit pic, that doesn’t featured her belly, and she may even have a belly since her arms look toned too and those arms don’t get the same muscle work as they don’t have to carry her fat ass around…..we’re more interest in the tits….

At least that was until noticing the guy she’s pissing in the pool next to has a fisting glove on, sure you could say he has a sports inury, but that could just be to avoid injury from the fisting, and we’ll assume he got that glove from her Texan ranch insemination barn, you know where the fisting of all COWS, even JESSICA take place….

Posted in:Jessica Simpson

2022

08

Apr

Jessica Simpson Bikini of the Day

The above picture is Jessica Simpson, the billionaire walmart brand owner, who was selling shitty fucking products to shitty fucking people before every celeb was doing it on instagram – CUT OUT THE MIDDLE MAN…..

So yeah, the above picture is a little “Weight Watchers has paid me millions to be fit”….a little “Britney Spears is doing nude bikini content, better bring out the big guns, to revive this 25 year rivalry of who is better tits”…a little “shameless milf who found pilates and still has tits”…..a little “what kind of shit did she do to her mouth / face she looks like a leprechaun or THE LEPRECHAUN…and I’m into it

The below picture is her when she was drinking…so when she’s sober, she looks like the top pic, when she’s drinking and sloth-like she looks like Louie Anderson with Down’s Syndrom…reminding women to only drink on dates to be socially lubricate them and make them easier to fuck…cuz that shit will destroy you…

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Posted in:Jessica Simpson

2020

11

Dec

Jessica Simpson Titty Veins of the Day

Jessica Simpson

Jessica Simpson brought her big 40 year old Texan tits to the internet to show off how veiny they are I guess…it’s a fetish, they call it ENGORGED tits which usually means they are lactating, but sometimes they just look engorged and get slipped in for good measure, you know it all the lactacting porn sites….not that I am a milky tit expert, but I post girls who show off their milky tits on MONDAYS…not because I like it but because I find it weird that these women are so stoked on their milk filled tits…that they need to post selfies…it just confirms that they pull their tits out in public for exhibitionism and not for feminism…obviously..

I’ll watch….

The only interesting thing about Jessica Simpson is that when she’s 300 pounds or when Weight Watchers pays her 1,000,000 or more dollars to lose weight for a campaign, she always has big tits…so even if she was the bootleg Britney and Christina….third tier popstar…back when popstars weren’t rich kids on instagram…where she’d be the equivalent of the HAILEY BIEBER….to her Kendall and Hadids…she’s consistently had big tits and tits get hits…

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Posted in:Jessica Simpson

2020

27

Apr

Jessica Simpson Old and Less Fat in her Bikini of the Day

As you know, celebrities are fucking annoying pieces of shit who are overpaid to do some of the dumbest and embarassing shit possible, like sing and dance.

In being celebrities, with far too much money, living their rich person lives that I am sure haven’t been affected too badly from the quarantine in their mansions they are already reclusive in…thanks to be celebrities.

But that doesn’t mean I hate them when they get bored and post up their bikini smut, because it is a nice reminder that they are all attention seeking whores who sexualize themselves for feedback from the fans as they should.

Jessica Simpson was 240 pounds a year ago, because this bitch gets fat on the regular then loses it all, in what you’d call Yo-Yo dieting, or weird weight gain stunts for various roles she plays in the bedroom with her husband sexually….”for this fetish, I need to gain 100 pounds, to play the Texan housewife who eats too much baked goods”….before going back to “but then we’ll sell an ad for a few million to some weightloss company nd I’ll play thinner, still busy, ex popstar wife”….you know to keep the husband feeling like he’s fucking new pussy, not the same old Jessica Simpson pussy…

At 39, she’s too old to be in a bikini, but I’ll still look at her clickbait tits…because what the fuck else is there to do.

Posted in:Jessica Simpson

2019

11

Jul

Jessica Simpsons Tits Turn 39 of the Day

Jessica Simpson 39 year old tits

Big News. Big Tits,

Jessica Simpson is nearly in menopause….it is just around the corner….so you can fantasize about cumming in her and not getting her knocked up soon enough…the nice old dry mom pussy vibe….but when I see starlets, all I want is to K-Fed her…

Those mom tits are on another level of absurd..sloppy and life changing if you were to choke on them….which you won’t unless you kidnap her – you weirdo.

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Posted in:Jessica Simpson|SFW

2019

10

Jan

Jessica Simpson’s Foot to Inspire Sweet Foot Fetish Dreams of the Day

That’s all I have to say about that.

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|SFW

2018

21

Sep

Jessica Simpson Monster Tits of the Day

Jessica Simpson is pregnant for the third or fourth time, and you know what that means, her monster mom tits are about to get substantially bigger…because if there’s one thing we know about Jessica Simpson beyond that she has huge tits, it’s that this girl blows the fuck up and eats the fuck up when she gets pregnant…after the first pregnant she was carrying 100 pounds of fat for years…until her dad or management got her 1,000,000 dollar deal to lose it…something even the richest billionaire could use as a motivator…if they actually want to lose weight.

Maybe the government needs to pay out all money they spend due to the financial strain obesity has on society…give that money back out to the fat people in dollars not in medicine for their diseases from being fat…I am sure at least 50% of them would try to lose the weight…for a while… before realizing they are lazy fucks and that’s why they are fat in the first place and they like being fat…so they go back to fat…..like Jessica Simpson is about to do….

Just look at her showing off her baked goods she’s eating up….to help relate to her Walmart Shopping fanbase….an easy to manipulate crowd if you’re fat and white and famous….

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|SFW