My favorite Rihanna story, which is probably the only Rihanna story I’ve got, is that I met a dude from Barbados a bunch of years ago, right when the country was hating on her because the government had just given her a bunch of Crown land for her contribution to the marketing of the island…back when she was at the peak of her celebrity, when celebrity mattered and was more than just running a MEME account….and bitch would snob out the locals who she knew her entire life…lik she would intentionally be a diva cunt cuz she knew she was better than them…treating them like the hired help she probably was when she was growing up….anyway…you get what I am saying, diva from small island, goes back to small island after becoming rich and famous and is a cunt to the locals…typical story you’d expect……

Dude made it very clear to me that she was poor as shit when she was growing up, like real life shantytown shit, and that when she was 14 she become a sex worker, where she found the British dude who brought her to America and sold her off to Jay Z….because if you’ve hear Rihanna sing, you’ll know she’s not nearly talented enough to end up being imported into America and cultivated into a popstar….

There’s the whole immigration thing, the navigating importing sluts from a small island, getting her a place to live…a lot went into her career…all while there are perfectly equally if not more talented people in Brooklyn next to Jay Z’s fucking investment properties….there is no logical reason why Rihanna happened, there was no youtube channel or viral video at the time…it was straight up teen girl abducted and brought to America….and for that I will always find her compelling….what do you want from me, I like whores.

Here are her tits on New Years

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Good thing everyone is classy and doesn’t get naked to sell product, so that when they do get half naked, we can collectively jump up and down with our boners in our hands like a bunch of circle jerking gamers from the Sci/Fi club at the local college watching Star Trek parody porn on a Friday night because they may be losers, but at least they have each other…

It’s almost boring, and that could be my fat man high estrogen / lower testosterone speaking, or maybe it’s my Rihanna is old and fat get someone else naked speaking…but I can say that out of all the starlets, she’s one who should get naked since she worked as a hooker for tourists in Barbados before she got famous, it’s how she got famous…I have insiders in Barbados who told me.

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Guess what?

It’s THANKSGIVING…and here’s a pilgrim from Barbados who has managed to influence your country’s pop culture, reminding you that there is no official AMERICA, but rather a series of immigrants who make up your great nation, and who produce content for your great nation to absorb and digest and buy into….all while making the immigrant far more rich than any actual American living in their trailer park home…and if that isn’t hilarious to you, it’s hilarious to me…

Here are her tits in some magazine spread…because this is how that media wins you over and tricks you into paying attention to their shit.

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Fat Rihanna had a party, her fourth annual party in NYC for Fashion week to promote some bullshit that I don’t care about, because I wasn’t invited to this party, so it’s one of those you need to be important to attend her party, but you don’t need to be important to buy her records, her music, her merchandise, her product lines, all making her stupid rich, which I guess is the insane thing about actual celebs…they know they are too good for you…all because you gave them money….each of you contributing to a bank balance that allows them to be a cunt.

What I am saying is that this elitist, celebs are better than us shit has been debunked, it’s not real, instagrammers and youtubers who are normal people are getting almost as famous…but the problem is once they hit star level…they too become elitist cunts…

I guess money and fame just makes elitist cunts…out of people who dream and work to be famous and rich and finally get what they want…

It’s like this bitch doesn’t even remember living in a Shanty in Barbados…before sex working her way to the top….where she still wears skimpy tops…fat tits thanks to being fat….

Candice Swanepoel and her tits were at the Rihanna Party…..

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Josephine Skriver was alos there…

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Rihanna looks mad…whilst smoking a blunt in Mexico…

I don’t know if she’s here with her Russian or Arab billionaire that she dates, and who dated Naomi Campbell before her, because clearly he has a type…black women, divas, rich and famous in their own right, which allows for them to be cunty as hell, which I guess keeps him entertained…

I heard they broke up, in gossip people somewhere, just not here care about…

I know she’s a crazy Bajan girl, who even if she wasn’t famous and rich would be super high maintenance. I know Bajan dudes and they always talk shit on how mental the women are, especially when you know them up, so if you factor in rich and fame…she must be the worst….

But her weight gain in her tits isn’t bad…even if it’s also a weight gain everywhere, clearly dude is filling her out for his fantasies to come true…cuz when you’re as rich as him, you can buy anything.

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