DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2019

18

Jul

Instathot of the Day

I don’t know her name – but she’s diddling herself on instagram shamelessly, so I’ll assume she’s an influencer, sugar baby, and/or cam girl…because this right here is how you make a mark and get ahead in this scary world of the internet…until you have a mental breakdown and end up realizing you are more than just some sex object doing nude shoots for meaningless likes and follows from perverts who are just there for the tits…you know that lack of substance following you don’t even properly execute or monetize…and that there is more to you and your voice…so you become trans for attention as kids are doing….because trans is taken seriously while tits out in underwear on internet is not.

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Posted in:Featured Post|SFW

2019

18

Jul

Ireland Baldwin Nudity of the Day

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Ireland Baldwin may not have got her moms genes, but she got that ass from her dad!

This is likely a photoshopped ass, which makes it EVEN worse of an ass than you originally thought it would be….

The only real question I have for Ireland, the 7 foot tall celebrity rich kid that her celebrity parents have written off / forgotten or in Alec Baldwin’s case, forced to start a whole new family because his first one was a fail, you know one of those people who rebuilds the farm after in burns down instead of crying about it, while leaving the casualty of the barn fire, in this case Ireland Baldwin to fend for herself with that insurance money the incident gave her. If you know what I mean, which you probably don’t, since I went a weird route explaining this G-String ass…

For the record, I hate G-Strings and always have….they just make asses, even good asses, look silly.

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Posted in:Ireland Baldwin|SFW

2019

18

Jul

Izabel Goulart Bikini of the Day

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Izabel Goulart , the ex Victoria’s Secret model turned fitness influencer, who has a really tight body despite being old, thanks to her low body fat percentage thanks to fitness….used to excite me…but like most of these over trained girls….addicted to fitness instead of cocaine like models are supposed to be addicted to…they get this hard bodies…but as they age…they become more and more masculine.

So when I am looking at slutty pics of her, hoping for a labia slip, I am here sub-consciously expecting a scrotum and that takes all the fun out of sexualizing her….I ain’t no queer you queer…

The fact she’s Brazilian, the hub of all Tranny AIDS that infiltrates the porn scene #LARAROXX makes it even more challenging…

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Posted in:Izabel Goulart|SFW

2019

18

Jul

Josephine Skriver Lingerie of the Day

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Josephine Skriver is the opposite of abortion, and not in the way everyone who is alive right now, or really anyone who has ever lived is the opposite of an abortion, but in the way that “GOD” didn’t intend for her to exist, she was created in a lab due to science, but who still got to exist because no one really cares about God’s plan, especially not scientists trying to figure out ways to fuck the system their own way…

She’s the opposite of an abortion in that people who get abortions get yelled at, spat on, or things thrown at them by the people of Jesus who think they are going against God’s gift of life, yes, even crackhead crack baby momma’s get the “it has a heartbeat you murderer”….where are Skriver was never the will of God or from natural sex…her gay biologist creator she calls dad, inseminated some lesbian’s egg and was forced to raise her cuz it worked….it defied “god’s” will and here she is producing smut on the internet, with the cosign of a billion dollar brand, making millions…cuz I guess God doesn’t exist.

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Posted in:Josephine Skriver|SFW

2019

18

Jul

Kendall Jenner Attention Seeking of the Day

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This idiot Kendall Jenner

Here she is at Wimbledon, who cares..

But she has hard nipples and her ass is out…and that’s the key to fucking success in this world that pretends to not value superficial things like looks or titties but that everyone celebrated like Kendall Jenner are putting out there in order to be celebrated. It’s so confusing to understand the narrative of the times…but that’s to be expected when the people you look up to are muppets.

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Posted in:Kendall Jenner|SFW

2019

18

Jul

Padma Lakshmi Bikini of the Day

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Padma Lakshmi likes to teach people her recipes for success which is pretty much….find a billionaire with cancer, seduce him, make him think he knocked you up, when really you’re knocked up by another billionaire, because she clearly only likes billionaire dick, it’s a status thing and a lifestyle thing…only to have the original billionaire die off thinking the kid is his, so he leaves it his fortune….and so the real dad, after the paternity test gives the kid his fortune also…DOUBLE DIPPING WITH THAT PUSSY HOLE…

That’s her MAIN recipe for success.

Her other RECIPE is for BUTTER CHICKEN….cuz she’s from INDIA.

Highlight of her career was her post calling out TRUMP for his “Get out of this country and go back to your own country, if you’re going to be Anti-American”….because I guess it hit close to home…you know her love for billionaire cock thwarted by her hate for being told to go back home to INDIA…even though no one was talking to her…

NOT TO MENTION at least one of her billionaire dicks was a Republican – which means she’s not against the right when is right up inside her…I GUESS.

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Posted in:Padma Lakshmi|SFW

2019

18

Jul

Rebecca Bangol Brings the Bush of the day

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Rebecca Bangol is some titty on the internet / instagram girl who I guess is just living the BOOTLEG Marisa Papen life, where the sex worker who likes getting naked, boldly gets naked, while proving she is an empowered woman by not shaving her cunt, as a shaved cunt has apparently been a sign of the patriarchy, while a misogynist like me has always and forever loved bush and encouraged all women to grow out their bush, because I guess things aren’t black and white, and you can appreciate traditional gender roles or at last be aware of how crazy women are, but still appreciate a natural, ungroomed approach to pussy hair….

It’s fascinating how diverse we are as a people.

And yes…this was BUSH on Instagram…a publicly traded company that recently just went up in value by 6 billion dollars cuz the internet is fucking nuts.

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Posted in:Rebecca Bangol

2019

18

Jul

Romee Strijd Bikini of the Day

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Romee Strijd is some hot, weird looking promo model….

She may be one of the many models Leo DiCaprio pretended to fuck because he’s a homo.

She may be a Victoria’s Secret model, which means she’s very important as a model, because that is what they consider to be legit modeling, even if it is just promo modeling for a mall brand that is an evil corporation that sells Chinese sweatshop made garbage to the people at inflated prices……so they can afford to keep their roster of sluts that people think are important models..

She may be skinny…

But she’s an immigrant stealing your American jobs. So you must hate her by default as you jerk off to her TITTIES.

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Posted in:Romee Strijd|SFW

2019

18

Jul

Sara Sampaio Bikini of the Day

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Sara Sampaio the Portuguese Fisherman’s daughter is out here showing off what she wears when she has to get the fishing nets back on the boat after they get snagged on all the plastics in the Ocean.

It’s a little slutty, but if you’ve ever heard her discuss her social media strategy – AND I HAVE – her whole thing is that the sluttier the pics, the more the likes, the more the brand – VICTORIA’ SECRET – gives her bonuses and when you’re just a Portuguese Fisherman’s daughter, all the money you can get in helps…and if showing your ass is how it’s done…then get it fucking done…cuz she grew up watching her dad risk his life at sea every damn day from 4 am to 7 pm or later….just to get food on the table…and this bitch just has to take an ass shot that literally takes 3-5 mins to get at the right angle…easy money in sex work…tell your daughters as they struggle through their math homework “you can always suck a dick you know”.

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Posted in:Sara Sampaio|SFW

2019

18

Jul

Top 10 Twitter Nudity of the Day

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Twitter is a publicly traded company, evaluated in the billions.

All the early investors are laughing on their private jets for their part in the scam that they pulled…

But it’s really just a place for people to post up some of their nudes for attention, followers..while being a place for perverts to see the nudes, which gets hits from people excited about tits which gets people excited about hits strategic in doing business deals that make it worth billions.

All this to say, the real idiot in all this is me.

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Posted in:Featured Post