DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2019

21

Jun

Janelle Monae Bikini of the Day

I think I was yelled at by Janelle Monae the other day…but that could have been someone else at the grocery store….which seems to be the only place I socialize…

Janelle Monae, not my Grocery Store clerk, is some high concept performer who you can tell thinks she’s an artist or performer or important…and that is irritating…but when stripped down to show their true self, you know what look like half naked, you can clearly see she’s average at best…so as important as she thinks she’s is, it doesn’t take away from how uneventful her bikini pics are…

I don’t really believe her storyline – where she was raised working class, with a Janitor mother and Truck driver dad, in Kansas…only to end up at some Performing arts school in NYC…which all broke people can afford…..then in 2001 she made her way down to Atlanta where Outkast signed her and mentored her and gave her a career…I just think there is more to the story, you don’t just call Outkast and say “sign me”….and when you’re broke…you don’t just move from Kansas to NYC for school.

Just another lie from some asshole trying to make her story more interesting so you buy her shitty music…or look at her in her shitty bikini….

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Posted in:Janelle Monae|SFW

2019

21

Jun

Kimberley Garner Almost Pussy Flash of the Day

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I hate doing Kimberley Garner because NO ONE cares about her.

I used to have some tracker that said how many people read a post and Kimberley Garner was consistently the worst..

We are talking a solid 100 people or less would look at her…

Which I thought was shocking considering she’s a hot blonde with a hot body doing shameless bullshit in bikinis as she tries to get relevant….from a reality show in the UK, to living in LA to launch a career there…I really thought that it’d be easy to pull off…

But then I realized she’s probably not very good at this internet thing cuz she doesn’t actually show her vagina and with her level of barely fame fame….you kind of have to.

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Posted in:Kimberley Garner|SFW

2019

21

Jun

Maitland Ward Public Nudity of the Day

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Maitland Ward is confusing.

It’s like how can someone be so washed up and disgusting…get people paying her a monthly fee to either see her fuck, or just get naked on the internet…

It’s fucking weird, but not as weird as when a reader sent me in all these Maitland Ward snapchat texts where she was offering him anal sex for 1000 dollars…

Something I posted, she emailed crying about and that I removed because I am a nice guy….who doesn’t think calling a whore a whore is mean…

So fast forward a few years from that snapchat sex working angle she was pulling, and girl now films amateur porn for her fans…fucking random dudes while her husband films…and she’s even got a porn deal with Brazzers or some shit.

It is the story of the sex tape done SO fucking wrong, but she doesn’t care cuz she failed forward – right into it.

Sex work, not all the impressive to get into, anyone can do it…even 45 year old has beens from a TV show to decades ago with a nerd following thanks to a few years of Comicon tours.

the whole thing…is pretty fucking gross.

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Posted in:Maitland Ward

2019

21

Jun

Rihanna Short Dress of the Day

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Rihanna in her short dress to attend her Fenty Pop-Up

I don’t know but the braids look familiar..

Is that racist? You can never be too sure in this era of everyone being so uptight and sensitive and pussies when it comes to racism and appropriation….

But for some reason they are not uptight about sex work…that probably got Rihanna to the top selling artist she is…..

It just doesn’t make sense that a 14 year old who couldn’t sing was brought to NYC from Barbados…..

There was a video years ago from Rihanna’s high school, where she sang, and she fucking SUCKED….so hard that NO ONE would have said “Let’s export her”…

Some illuminati pedo shit must have been involved…

Island girl, who is getting a museum in Barbados, despite the locals hating her and her low class ways, even though she put them back on the map as more than just a tax haven for people from the UK….andI know she’s from the islands and not Africa…and that her family may have been plantation slaves for the purpose of Sugar Cane….but that was a long time ago and not what they are now….I mean her dad was a hard working garbage man…

Point being, her thighs are big….and she looks like shit…

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Posted in:Rihanna|SFW

2019

21

Jun

Retired Cameron Diaz Hard Nips of the Day

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People call them pokies, I used to call them NIP-ON…titty boners…is she cold or is she turned on…who knows…she’s in her 50s, retired and I guess making an appearance to remind you that she has sex with one of the Good Charlotte twins, and if that isn’t embarrassing, considering she’s Cameron Diaz and could be with anyone who doesn’t look like teen angst from the 90s at the mall in the midewest trying to be cool….but I guess she’s too fucking old to really know what cool is.

I wonder how much netflix has been throwing at her to get her back on screen acting as the old and tired love interest…..because people like nostalgia…and want that comeback tour….you know since she’s Cameron Diaz…

Posted in:Cameron Diaz|SFW

2019

21

Jun

Aubrey O’Day Topless of the Day

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Aubrey O’Day from Danity Kane a band no one cares about – but that validated this girl’s existence and that gave her the opportunity to FUCK Diddy, then all the spillover cock that comes from dudes wanting to fuck the ass Diddy fucked, including but not limited to Don Trump Jr…is out here on instagram…producing some of the most ridiculous content for instagram…going over the fucking top on her creative direction…maybe following one too many Drag Queen’s approach to content…all cartoon-like and colorful….a face full of fucking injections…angles that make me feel like a gyno….just staring straight at the cunt…unfortunately a covered cunt…cuz I want to see the womb that Diddy didn’t knock up, but that I am sure she wishes he did….

It’s wild…but I am not sure whether it is hot or not…I’m pretty much on the fence here.

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Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|SFW

2019

21

Jun

Chantel Jeffries Bikini of the Day

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Chantel Jeffries is one of those clown face bitches from instagram who thinks she’s a Kardashian, or tries to be a Kardashian, and rips off the Kardashian look and feel, but injecting her face making her look like some kind of porno dick sucking muppet…

Apparently people find that look hot, but it usually comes with a whore who gets half naked in bikinis, in this case white bikinis, that get see through when wet so that you can see their full pussies….the way I like bikinis to be….but even when dry they can show full pussy…cuz this rapper and athlete fucking sex worker who pretends she’s a DJ…pulls that shit right up in her like it hasn’t been fed in weeks….you know to show you parts of her fucking soul…or really the only thing about her that matters…

It’s low hanging fruit, garbage looking bullshit…but it’s a bikini so there’s that.

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Posted in:Chantel Jeffries|SFW

2019

21

Jun

AnnaLynn McCord Hard Nipples of the Day

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In case you were wondering, AnnaLynn McCord, is not making a comeback in any way shape or form, at least not in terms of here acting career that I think lasted a solid 15 minutes but that she really milked the fuck out of…so that we all think she was around longer or more relevant than she actually is thanks to hype, but as it turns out…she’s useless….But her nipples are still out there….doing what nipples do….because they don’t know they belong to such a nobody…and go on living hard….rather than crawling back into themselves all defeated and inverted like AnnaLynn McCord should do.

Heres here sister Rachel with equally hard nipples..

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Posted in:AnnaLynn McCord|SFW

2019

21

Jun

Chloe Kim Bikini of the Day

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This just in CHLOE KIM is in a bikini….which is very fucking important because it is a reminder that even when you’re an Olympian in a sport that should probably not be an Olympic sport, but that the Olympic committee probably put together to try to get a younger, fresher, cooler audience…you know the board sport kids…keeping in X-TREME….you can post bikini pics for attention like all girls do….being an athlete doesn’t mean you can’t strip down half naked to get jerked off to…it doesn’t mean you should only post positive content about your sports….being slutty on the internet is INCLUSIVE….it is for EVEREYONE!

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Posted in:Chloe Kim|SFW

2019

21

Jun

Dora Madison Burge NIpples of the Day

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Dora Madison Burge is not famous, but apparently she’s on TV, on a show called Chicago Fire, that is not to be confused with Chicago PD, or Chicago Medics, or any of the other Chicago based emergency worker shows that I guess are some kind of franchise that people are into watching…because people are morons and need simplistic concepts in OBAMA’s city, a crime filled city….to keep the storylines simplistic and easy to understand in this retard world….

She’s better known for being a girl on instagram who fucking loves flashing her tits, for whatever reason, a reason I assume is the American dream to all of us into tits…and I guess for her because if this was an Arab country and she was flashing tit like a floozie she’d be stoned to death…

I don’t think there’s a point to the nipple flash other than her getting fucking WET and EXCITED…that tingle in her cunt knowing people are into it.