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2019

29

Mar

Candice Swanepoel Pussy Flash of the Day

Candice Swanepoel is in TULUM on vacation because she’s celebrating not being pregnant for the first time in 4 years…

She is boring, she hasn’t done anything interesting besides Victoria’s Secret, she never tried to break free from the evil corporation and do something innovative or interesting, because I guess bitches are fucking lazy, and this one was making well over a million dollars a year, more than she ever expected to make back home in South Africa where she was avoiding legless athletes with guns, AIDS, and black people who were revolting the insane white racism of South Africa….

But look at her now, in Mexico, in a bikini, like a legitimate socialite all at the age of 30….retirement time…and still looking hot after 2 kids…cuz some bitches just do things better.

I can’t vouch for her cunt, that shit is probably blown the fuck out…but if it’s strapped into a tight bikini bottom….how the fuck are we to know otherwise…it’s not like she’s showing any of her labia…

Instead, she is showing us this…her most interesting work that isn’t even that interesting.

HER TITS ARE OUT!

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Candice Swanepoel|SFW

2019

29

Mar

Jennifer Aniston Reminds Us that Old Hags Refuse to Be Old of the Day

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Some people say that age is just a state of mind.

I call bullshit…

Age is when your body falls the fuck apart and your pussy dries up and your tits sag to the ground cuz you’re old as fuck.

You can be in denial. You can take measures to make yourself feel like the best version of yourself but when you’re old you’re old and that’s where the story ends…

Put your tits out there. You’re still old…

Jennifer Aniston…in denial of being old…

To see the rest of the old lady in action CLICK HERE

Posted in:SFW

2019

29

Mar

Spring Break Forever of the Day

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Spring Break Forever motherfuckers..

I don’t know if Spring Break is still going on, but it’s gotta be, since Spring Break Forever motherfuckers..

I do know that Spring Break is inspiring, a time to strip down all your winter depression and down as much alochol as possible, in efforts to get some fucking AIDS or some shit…it’s not a death sentence…

I do know that even when you’re an old married fuck, you can strategically plan your Spring Break trip around young hot college girls in bikinis…and you’ll be entertained in your fold out beach chair you got at Costco or at the community Bingo last summer, too old to get noticed by the bikini girls, making your creeping on them a stealth operation….

I also know that whether you Spring Break or just Jerk off to Spring Break content or not, you should probably do it while wearing a HANGOVER PATCH ….not the most conventional cure to a hangover but hey if it helps you fight off that 72 hour hangover it’s worth a try…cuz hangovers suck.

Just yesterday I drank a bottle of sour tasting wine, that I wondered whether I lost my taste for wine, of it it was just rancid….only to have the gnarliest (that’s spring break talk for craziest) hangover ever…I was fucking puking, shitting fire, and migrained yesterday…..because I wasn’t wearing my hangover patch and or because I am dying thanks to hard living all these years..

Point being, don’t be like me in any aspect of your life…Look at me and see all that is wrong with the world…listen to my advice that comes from experience at failing at life…use me as an inspiration as to how not to act….But listen to me when I say….try the hangover patch, because I didn’t, and I got sick….

So GET YOURS NOW ….we’re offering a PROMO….

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Posted in:Uncategorized

2019

29

Mar

Charlotte McKinney Topless of the Day

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Charlotte McKinney is clearly an advocate of smoking cigarettes.

In an era where SMOKING KILLS and every idiot out there knows it kills, you would think she would be a little more responsible with her voice, personal brand, that I am sure NO ONE actually pays attention to, because it barely exists, but that still shouldn’t encourage smoking to the young kids on social media looking for tits.

It’s like the people have wanted to see her naked for so long, and this is how she brings it to them, with a cigarette in hand…like she just finished a good fuck…

I am not even going to get into whatever is going on in her men’s underwear…is that a MAXI PAD, or a dick?

I am not even going to get into her feet, or the angle the feet were shot that make them look bigger than the biggest of feet.

I call this the Smoking Sauna Pose….cuz it looks like some fat dude sprawled out on the other side of the Sauna MANSPREADING in ways you don’t want to see when all you’re trying to do is DETOX….

Unfortunate.

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Posted in:Charlotte McKinney

2019

29

Mar

Rosie Huntington Whiteley Wet Bikini of the Day

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Rosie Huntington Whiteley, the celebrity fucking, titty showing model who has made at least one baby with Jason Strathem, the bald action star bald people like, because he gives them hope..he motivates you bald fucks to work out, take up martial arts, and get rich, because those things combined off-set male pattern baldness, and create an environment where top models, like Rosie Huntington Whiteley…a fashion model who despite being so uppity and classy….busted out the titties.

I assume this is her promoting some of her own bullshit…make that money when you can, where you can….and if only every mom was this rich, hot, and worth looking at half naked….right.

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Posted in:Rosie Huntington-Whiteley|SFW

2019

29

Mar

Nicky Whelan Topless of the Day

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I don’t know whats going on here but Nicky Whelan is topless getting fucked by Don Cheadle or is that Denzel…or is it that Mohammed Ali guy who keeps winning Academy awards….and is that even Nicky Whelan….someone who you wouldn’t know if it was or wasn’t her because she doesn’t exist, or hasn’t existed since the 90s….but bringing her tits out to survive…I like that..but not as much as she likes black cock…(she married a black guy) making this acting not acting at all…but rather living out fetishes on camera while playing make belief or some shit…

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Posted in:Nicky Whelan

2019

29

Mar

Haley Kalil Erotica of the Day

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Haley Kalil was featured in the 2018 SI Model Search…..which basically means that she was bundled with 400 people trying to live out their dreams….while being preyed on by Sports Illustrated to repost…and tag them

It is instagram / social media marketing / survival….

Get as many idiots as you can tagging you so you are seen as relevant to the Instagram machine….and relevance is what makes you money with adverstisers…

So exploit these dumb cunts…and get them doing your “street team”…shit.

Pretty slutty…

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Posted in:Haley Kalil

2019

29

Mar

Doutzen Kroes Bikini of the Day

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Doutzen Kroes is in Miami…..

I assume to police her husband and father of her kids..it is music week…you know because she’s an old hag, but at least a fit old hag, with abs and everything, doing what she has to do to stay as relevant and hot as she can, despite nature taking over and her slowly fucking rotting away….

When you’re a fired from Victoria’s Secret 5 years ago, who has barely found work and when you’re a mom of 3 in your 30s….who met your DJ husband when you were at your prime…you know the odds of him not fucking young girls is high as fuck…you’re done…so best be there to make sure you can supervise them…

So expired milk or not, her pussy is in a bikini…festering as mom pussy does…angrily knowing she’s not the young hot thing anyone wants…but is instead “hot for an old chick”….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Doutzen Kroes|SFW

2019

29

Mar

Alexis Ren Erotica of the Day

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Alexis Ren out here like so many ugly bitches on social media….proving to us that natural beauty doesn’t matter as long as you have a hot body, hot ass, some bolt on tits to distract the perverts with…

I don’t know why she’s in underwear, boots, posing, like it is a job…because someone is throwing money at this…making it a job…but the whole thing is so fucking simplistic, stupid, mindless, and lazy….because it has a half naked ass in it to give it value.

Point of the story, if you have an ass that you’re into showing off….you can get paid and that may be the most important lesson for some of you closet cases out there tired of work…there are people out there with budget down to be FUCKING assholes.

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Posted in:Alexis Ren|SFW

2019

29

Mar

Sydney Sweeney Potential Pussy Flash of the Day

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Sydney Sweeney is kinda hot….

She’s from Everything Sucks!. The Handmaid’s Tale. Also in Sharp Objects….

She’s got big titties…and she’s now brought that to instagram to do what people her age are doing to market themselves…showing off their bodies the way Jesus wants them to…otherwise why bother having a hot young body…

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Posted in:SFW|Sydney Sweeney