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2015

08

Dec

Amy Hixson Posing with Porn for Glamour Italia of the Day

Amy Hixson can suck my anus…no seriously, all these models are for hire, you just have to pretend you have a private jet…and they usually won’t even charge you…

That’s not to say Amy Hixson is quite like all the other models, I am sure she would never admit she’s like the other models, because with these models comes a level of delusion that involves not realizing that they are only into rich guys and famous guys..but are the first to call out other girls for being whores…or sugar babies…but never taking ownership

I guess what I am saying is that I love Amy Hixson and want to have her baby, after she marries a rich guy, so that I can mooch off her like she mooches off him…seems to the only way this love will work out…

In the meantime I’ll try to understand the “artist” statement of this silly shoot for Glamour Italia…

Posted in:Amy Hixson|SFW

2015

08

Dec

Winona Ryder for Marc Jacobs of the Day

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I never jerked off to Winona Ryder….but she is in one of my Favorite Holiday Movies…”Little Women”…

The most amazing thing about Winona Ryder isn’t that she’s fucked half of hollywood in the 30 years she’s been part of hollywood…but rather that she was considered an “it girl” for the longest time…even though we all know her best work was when she was robbing department stores…not modeling for brands sold in department stores….like this one for Marc Jacobs…

I never quite understood her, but then I found out that she had massive Jewish girl tits, and all of a sudden it made sense, despite those tits never been used in movies for good….but I guess saved for casting couches for evil…you know to manipulate the job….

And I don’t understand why they’re still not being celebrated, this is like shitting on 1990…harder than…Milli Vanilli..

Non tits, when you have big tits, especially at 44 when nothing else is really working out for her sex appeal…is a fucking crime she should be arrested for…like it was 2001..

My opinion of this ad is that it’s reminiscent of doing cocaine at Hollywood afterparties…off mirrored tables all these hollywood types have…

This has been a minute in reconnecting with Winona Ryder…

Posted in:SFW|Winona Ryder

2015

08

Dec

Bella Thorne is Working it of the Day

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Bella Thorne is working the 18 year old turned 40 year old…or who is 40 years old…pretending to be 18…it’s good for business…no one likes 40 year olds..but everyone likes 18 year olds…even if they look like 40 year olds..

I know this is confusing…let me break it down…

Bella Thorne was born in 1970….

Bella Thorne’s family decides they don’t want to work the traditional life, and figure, “can you pretend to be 15″…

So they spend a decade going to auditions, and eventually it works out for them, possibly because of plastic surgery, but maybe because of the power of conviction..because everyone believes the lie….and I guess she’s liking the attention and flashing body parts, as people do when they finally make it…the more aggressive the pic, the more famous the chick in the pic gets…#SCIENCE….

I guess what it comes down to is that like you, 40 or 18, 18 or 40, as long as there is a nipple peaking out of bra on snapchat, I’m ok with it..because I’ve never met a nipple peaking out of a bra I haven’t liked….

Here she is at an event…wearing a bra…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2015

08

Dec

Anna Tunhav in a Bikini for a Bikini Company of the Day

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Anna Tunhav is a Swedish model and she’s modeling bikinis for….wait for it…. a bikini company…

The problem with bikini companies is that there are too many of them…

The problem with bikini photoshoots is that they are all the fucking same…

The problem with models is that they don’t fuck me…

So when I look at these pics, all i see is problems..

Posted in:Anna Tunhav|SFW

2015

08

Dec

Madison Reed’s Booty Sniff of the Day

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Who is Madison Reed…..according to wikipedia, Madison Reed was an American cabaret and ragtime performer who worked with Eubie Blake among others….

This is Eubie Blake….

Seems about right….

She should probably update that…but she’s too busy getting her ass sniffed by art, in what we could assume is a young hooker, trying to be cute and funny about her craft, knowing very well, she’d like the execs at Disney…sniff her ass….

What I am saying is this “joke”…is more of a “planting the seed, to give the right person the right idea, to help launch her career”…since as of today – the only Madison Reed is an American cabaret and ragtime performer who worked with Eubie Blake among others….

Posted in:Madison Reed|SFW

2015

08

Dec

Alessandra Ambrosio’s Harper’s Bazaar Kazakstan of the Day

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If you’re interested in Kazakstan fashions…here’s Alessandra Ambrosio, a lingerie model, being as slutty as she can for these Arabs / Russian / Asia border…becuase you don’t want to offend the wrong person and have them go shoot up your planned parenthood….

I would make a Kazakstan joke, but I think Borat built a fucking career on that, so we can just stare at Alessandra’s old mom face and remember that all things die.

Maybe it’s better that she’s in winter gear…you know save the half nakedness for the youth who have replaced her…

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|SFW

2015

08

Dec

Christina Milian is an Emoji Tits of the Day

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In case you didn’t know…Christina Milian is an attention seeking whore, trying out the whole instagram model angle of posting slutty pics to get noticed, seeing as she’s had a hit song, and written hit songs, and even hosts a TV show, as the secondary host…and no one gives a fuck about her…

So she might as well make an emjoi bra and an emoji face…that after much analysis…makes her look cuter and more interesting than she usually looks…

If you’re into black moms with fat tits…whoring…like some Houston stripper…here’s some Milian…and when looking at this, keep in mind, she’s got a lot of money and can just as easily not post nonsense about herself..

Posted in:Christina Milian|SFW

2015

08

Dec

Emily Ratajkowski’s Love Magazine’s Day 8 of the Day

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I am convinced there is going to be an end to the instagram model…

I am convinced that people are bored of all these no name girls posting aggressive pics…not because they are bored of the aggressive…as slutty as they can get without being porno….and deleted….disguised as fashion and art…because tits get hits…and in Emily Ratajkowski’s case, she’s been able to leverage her tits to a relatively legit career….she’s in actual movies..not very good movies but still in movies…all while having little to no talent…

But she has tits…

I don’t know how sustainable her career is, but she’s made over a million dollar with her tits, pretty good ROI when they only cost 5,000 dollars…

Right?

I mean this isn’t fashion or art, it’s cheesy porn I can’t jerk off to…almost embarassing…what the fuck is she doing….I guess trying to be relevant…and it’s worked…just like it did for Tila Tequila…

Boring….

Posted in:Emily Ratajkowski|SFW

2015

08

Dec

Adriana Lima Shows You How She Got Fat of the Day

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Adriana Lima is up on the “fat chicks get work” because she’s old…and being fat is on Trend…

I guess she wanted to show the new David Letterman how she got there….with Chicken Wings…

It’s convenient because she’s already established herself as a babe and a model…so this…..”fat chicks get the jobs”….”Fat chicks get celebrated for being fat, so why the fuck am I going to work out 8 hours a day for my millionss of dollars, when I can just eat as much as I fucking want and pretend it’s a feminist movement, for my millions of dollars…”….

She’s paid her dues to the patriarchy….let her be free…and show the world…

Lazy.

Posted in:Adriana Lima|SFW

2015

08

Dec