DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2015

20

Oct

Selena Gomez Loves Selena Gomez So Much of the Day

Chemotherapy ridden Selena Gomez took time out of having a weak immune system and mocking people who are actually sick from Chemotherapy treatments…to promote her new album that Chemotherapy treatment announcements have been talking points in the marketing campaign they planned…it’s like “talk about your chemo to get america on your side, but only when you have something to promote”…

SO she posted this picture of her, that instead of being a picture of her, it’s a pictures of her having her picture taken by a bunch of people, as she tries to suck her gut in and play sexy….and all I see from this is a girl who needs 6 images of her in the frame….because just one of you in a picture is so basic…right?

Posted in:Selena Gomez|SFW

2015

20

Oct

Mischa Barton Almost Died of the Day

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Remember Mischa Barton…well, she fell.

There was a time when I was doing a Mischa Barton death watch, it was so exciting thinking that any day she’d die, but they never die…

But I guess in her death watch’s defence, you know she’s dead without being dead…as no one cares about her, and I’d argue that no one under the age of 30 even knows who the fuck she is…

The good years were when she was fat, unshowered, probably drunk or on drugs for at least a year or two after the OC…fame had got the best of her, and every time she’d leave her house, in soiled clothing, with her dead eyes, I would get excited thinking “maybe today”…I’m a sick person…

But I guess with this fall, we can hope the decline is back, the good years over, the demons back out and getting at her like she was Lohan, but never quite as hot, famous, or amazing breasted as Lohan…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Mischa Barton|SFW

2015

20

Oct

Elsa Hosk Naked for Adam Frnazino of the Day

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Victoria’s Secret is Elsa Hosk….is naked….

The photographer she’s getting naked for is Adam Frnazino…

I am not sure if these are from before or after she booked Victoria’s Secret and mattered as a model, or if they are when she was just trying to get naked and noticed, in hopes of booking a gig like Victoria’s Secret… I just know that you can see her tits, and tits…are more interesting than her in photoshopped lingerie pics…since you can see her otherwise airbrushed nipples…

She’s Swedish, like Ikea…

Posted in:Elsa Hosk|SFW

2015

20

Oct

The Tits from the Blurred Lines Video is in VOGUE of the Day

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How does this even happen? Oh right…the internet…

The Tits from the Blurred Lines Video is in VOGUE USA…and she’s not even showing off her fake tits, her fake lips, her fake everything that she designed to get to this level of celebrity….

I would argue that she isn’t talent and that she doesn’t deserve any of this, she’s just been clever in how she works the photogaphers who want her instagram followers….I know she’s done movies and all that nonsense, but she’s uninteresting, and barely a celebrity, but rather just an instagram model who has tricked a few people due to tits…

She had the right timing and went viral…probably in more way than one..yes AIDS….or at least herpes, it’s a small price to pay to get cast..

I just wish there was more substance to her, more excitement, more than just tits, even though I don’t mind celebrating a woman who has identified herself to the world as just tits…I would just be amazed if this career leads to anything more substantial than where it’s at now…because she’s boring, we’ve seen her naked, replace her with a young one.

All this to say, pretty shitty editorial shoot for the big break in Vogue, who are clearly desperate for attention…

Posted in:Emily Ratajkowski|SFW

2015

20

Oct

Amy Adams Bra is Not Erotic of the Day

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Sweet bra Amy Adams…I don’t love me some menopausal red headed body…she’s 41 and that alone should make her obsolete…but this is the acting world and I guess as an award nominated actress…she is capable of acting hot, or at least like she has some kind of sex appeal, which clearly was ill advised and needed a better director…because if it involves wearing a bra…it is a fail….and at 41 she should know better…if she’s out there showing off her bra like a shirt…she should bite the fucking bullet..and just show us her tits…but I guess she’s trying to be a lady about things, but who is she tricking, she’s an actress and that alone makes her a whore….like most redheads, especially at the high school level, because no one wants to fuck them…except weird people….who like freaks…and are so horny they don’t gag when they see the orange pubic hair…something I’ve found has taken me 30 years to adapt to….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Amy Adams|SFW

2015

20

Oct

Carmen Electra Looks Beat the Fuck Up of the Day

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Hollywood hooker Carmen Electra, brought out her fake tits and rugged face…to an event…and it brought back memories of a better era, when instagram models didn’t dilute the importance of these whores….or the whore’s importance…

Because, we always need whores, but now they’re a dime a fucking dozen, geographically spread out…all over the world…they don’t need to be in Playboy, or Hollywood and they don’t need to fuck rockstars or Dennis Rodman…

Carmen Electra is 100 years old…but all that plastic…makes her look like she’s 100 years old, trying to be 25…and that level of effort….is magical…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Carmen Electra|SFW

2015

20

Oct

Lamar Odom Sold Out By the Hookers of the Day

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So the hookers at the Bunny Ranch sold off some selfies they took of Lamar Odom dying in the whore house, because you can never trust a whore after you fall asleep, especially when they were paid by the Kardashians to knock you the fuck out, because the first chance they have to sell it to the Kardashian media contacts through the Kardashian publicists because the Kardashians like this storyline, it’s good for business…and the fact that the Kardashians exist is all your fault…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Lamar Odom|SFW

2015

20

Oct

Taylor Swift Has No Sex Appeal for GQ Video of the DAy

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I guess the LOL of the day is Taylor Swift confidently posing and making seductive sexy model faces…that are obviously forced for her awkward, zero sex appeal, bullshit romantic tween love song career…but you can tell she wants it so bad…she wants to be a Victoria’s Secret model she abducted, adopted, locked in her basement to either steal their souls, or maybe make them teach her everything she knows…because she had no childhood, and they are her interactive toys…who she can learn everything she needs from…but despite being a calculated, formulaic, contrived act that has worked because America is lazy…she still isn’t something I’d ever jerk off to…and even if I was fucking her, I’d probably have my eyes closed while thinking about everyone who isn’t Taylor Swift to cum…even though she’s the biggest act around, that everyone is attaching themselves to…she just can’t give me a boner…but I guess very little can…thanks to importance…but she can’t even stimulate my brain into wanting to sex offend her..and I’ve sex offended inanimate objects..something I think Taylor Swift may be…

You’ve already seen the pics…

Posted in:SFW|Taylor Swift

2015

20

Oct

Beyonce in One-Piece for Beat Magazine of the Day

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Beyonce, who had the worst scandal of her life last week, when her dad said she was the exact same age as Pink and Usher, who are apparently 2-3 years older than her on Wikipedia, because we can assume someone down the line of famous lied about her age to get her in the door, forcing them to stick with it….

You know a scandal far worst than all the divorce rumors, fake pregnancy rumors, the fight in the elevator for having a cheating husband rumors…not to mention her dad knocking up stripper rumors…or my personal favorite…that Beyonce is sent from hell, is the fucking devil incarnated, here to dance like she’s a 20 year old, because her ego needs to perform and she can’t bow down gracefully like she was J.Lo….but instead…wears one piece bathing suits…which I guess are appropriate for 40 year old moms…but she’s not doing it to hide her gross body…she’s doing it to get you to jerk off to her…it makes Jay Z thinks she’s still hot…and thus worth not sticking with for business reasons..

She’s the worst…and these pics for Beat Magazine would have been better with more spread ass…let’s make all photoshoots OB/GYN exmas…

Either way, she does it for America or because of America..

Posted in:Beyonce|SFW

2015

20

Oct

Bridgit Mendler Ass Flash on TV of the Day

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Her name is Bridgit Mendler…She’s a Disney Star and she signed with the corrupt, twisted, powerful, brain washing, evil empire in 2009, when she was 15….

Working for Disney means more than just being well trained, hard working and even hireable in the entertainment industry, despite being on shitty tv shows…it means more than just being exploited by parents who spent the first 15 years of their lives conditioning them to be accepted by Disney, even in a secondary role…it means more than the execs at Disney who have been rumored to be pedophiles and the whole foundation of Disney based on pedophilia…which I guess brainwashing kids is a key component of…it means that dads who are forced to watch this shit with their kids…because their lives suck and the only way they know how to spend quality time with their kid is in front of their big screen TV…it’s the american way…that leads to jerk off sessions in the bathroom when the rest of the family is sleeping…craving the Disney young pussy…

Well, I guess Bridgit Mendler, is either trying to redefine her career…breaking free from the brand that made her and that lent her to this Undateable show…because they own her…and that’s how it works…and the second they let her free, she’s out flashing her ass for the world….because all actors are whores…and now every dad around the country that watched her smutty TV when she was on Disney get what Disney never showed them….

Posted in:Bridgit Mendler|SFW