DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2015

09

Jul

Michelle Rodriguez Shitty Panty Flash of the Day

I am a firm believer that Michelle Rodriguez is a man, because I am a basic man, who is old, and confused by these whole gender confused generation of cross dressing, fuck everything, because we are all god’s people and need to love each other, even though we don’t believe in God because that’s not hip on the internet….religion is not science…and science always wins…and we’re so fucking horny from all this porn we watch all day…like Frank’s Red Hot Sauce, I’ll stick my dick in everything…

So to me, an old school, old timer, who is old…broad shouldered, narrow hipped, thick and not in a video vixen way, Michelle Rodriguez is better off wearing panties, so that we don’t have to deal with her dick.

Yes, basic jokes like that used to carry me…no I barely exist…but if Michelle Rodriguez made a come back by having lesbian sex on the beach…I have hope.

TO SEE SOME OTHER MICHELLE RODRIGUEZ OUTFITS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Michelle Rodriguez|SFW

2015

08

Jul

stepLINKS of the Day

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There’s something magical about watching a girl choose Watermelons in the grocery store…especailly when she looks like a Russian prostitute dressed in a mini-skirt and in heels, making me wonder what that watermelon is for….is she going to let her John fuck it, or am I reading into her look and Russian accent too much, or is she going to insert it in her vagina…because her John is just that rich…or is she just excited by it not being communist….

But not as magical as the stepLINKS…

So Many Asses
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Tom Selleck Stealing Water is AMazing
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Woman Poses Nude on Wall Street
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Courtney Stodden Patriotic
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Slut of the Day
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Ariana Grande’s Update on Hating AMerica….
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Kaley Cuoco’s in Fitness Gear
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Exploding Blow Darts
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Video of the Egyptian Belly Dancer
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Chrissy Teigen Must be getting Paid by Instagram for the Markeitng Campaign
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Courtney Stodden’s Nipple
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Eliza Gonzalez Hot at a Movie Premiere
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So Much Paris Hilton in a Bikini Top
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Claudia Romani Nip Slip
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Dozens of ISIS Fighters Die Eating Ramadan Meal
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Small Bikinis
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LeBron, DWade, CP3 and Melo on a Banana Boat Together
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Piper from Orange is the New Black and Carrie Brownstein are Fucking..
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Tortilla Record
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Most Awkward Pictures of Nerds Next to Women
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Stephanie Pratt in a Bikini
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Christina Milian Pokies
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Trying to Look Down Demi Lovato’s Shirt
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Chelsea Handler Waterskiing
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Michelle Rodriguez in a Tight Dress
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Puerto Rico’s Gone Bankrupt – Where’s Jenny from the Block?
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More Asses for Wednesday
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Jessica Alba’s Tube Top
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Kittens Meet Puppies for the FIrst Time
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What Pornstars Do When They Retire
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PewDiePie Made 7 Million in 2014….
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Ben Affleck is on Heroin…
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Ben Affleck is a Cheater…
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Best Comic Book Superheroes of All Time
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Rosie Huntington is Dope
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So Much Underboob
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Marisa Tomei is Old Aunt May in the New Spiderman Movie
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Ronaldo’s Weird Ad Campaign
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Kardashians in WHite Because they are Pure….Pure Shit…
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Cop Fired for Throwing DNA on a Girl
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From stepSMUT!! LINKS BELOW ARE VERY NSFW!
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TOP TIT-TO-TIT Scenes in Movies
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Porn GIFS
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CAM PUSSY!! CAM PUSSY!!
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Girl Reveals Her Tits on Czech TV
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Girl In Front of the Mirror
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Beach Volleyball Nudity
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Granny Crossing
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Proud Naked German
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Big Tits Topless
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Beach Volleyball Nudity
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CAM PUSSY!! CAM PUSSY!!
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Girl Reveals Her Tits on Czech TV
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Boat Tits…
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Nerdy Cam Girl
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Mia Isabella’s Work…NSFW
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Girl Smoking a Bong in Sheer Panties…
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Another Stoned Girl Getting Stoned
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The best, Freash, Young Amazing, Live, Naked, Girls…
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Hot Strip Show
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Sex Tape that Isn’t a Sex Tape But is Still a Sex Tape of the Day
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The Best Fucking Links Ever
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2015

08

Jul

Jaime King Pregnant Erotica of the Day

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[jwplayer player=”1″ mediaid=”146074″]

Here’s a “Fashion Film”…that I think is absolute garbage, because I’m a hater, and seeing rich people rent a shitty hotel room, to make a really shit quality video, that looks like it was soaked in piss, because I guess they think that is more fashionable, high concept, hip, raw and real and “Hollyweird”…when really it’s just tansparent two dimensional garbage…

I know you’re fakes….and the only reason I am posting it is because I like Patsy Cline, even when misused in this smut, I think there’s some Serge Gainsbourg too, is this Hipster Amateur Hour?

I am posting it because James King, ex-heroin addict and I guess friend to the hacks who made this bootleg video that isn’t even as good as something I saw in film school in the 90s…is in her lingerie while pregnant…and I like that..

The other idiots involved are: Abbey Lee Kershaw, James Concannon, Jaime King, Ivan Lofstrom, & Juliana Sorelli

It’s for clothing line Hollyood Savage Society

Posted in:Jaime King|SFW

2015

08

Jul

Cindy Crawford’s Gerber Baby for Steven Meisel and Vogue Italia of the Day

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Kaia Gerber is the billion dollar heir to the Gerber family fortune, a fortune coupled with her dad’s level of “LA Cool” owning clubs and bars and restaurants, lured in her mom Cindy Crawford, when she was at the top of her career, because everyone from Homeless girls to Top Fashion models are hookers, money grubbing hookers, they just come in at different budgets…

It is safe to say that Kaia Gerber, is either genetically predisposed to model, that people around her don’t mind whoring her out, or have her photographed by older men…for magazines…creepy…

It is also safe to say, that this is the Kardashian era of Selfies, and that everyone, especially rich girls, want instagram likes and followers, so why not do the GIGI HADID, and get a head start at it, because you have a mom to oversee everything….so you’re safe…and by the time you’re 18…you’ll be massively famous…with so many followers, all the brands will want you..

Intersting….only unlike other aspiring intagram whores…she goes straight to IMG models, shot by top photographer Steven Meisel…for Vogue Italia…cuz that’s how it works when rich…

She’s 14….

Posted in:Kaia Gerber|SFW

2015

08

Jul

Panera Bread Manager VS Employee of the Day

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So apparently this happened at a Panera Bread:

Panera employee quit mid shift, just wasn’t having it today. Threw some bag of chips on the floor, yelled, etc NBD. Manager in white shirt basically threw her out the door, she came back, and then…..this

Which reminds us all that low paid, shitty low level management jobs in shitty fast food franchises, lead to despression and a little to pent up anger that makes you lose your fucking shit…when one of your employees quits on the spot…because this is a generation of entitled, lazy, materialistic fucks….but at least you can always eat your feelings with a bread soup bowl..or by beating up girls…what the fuck..

Posted in:stepNEWS

2015

08

Jul

Rita Ora’s Nipple Slip of the Day

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When you’re a Rihanna Impersonator holding on as hard as you can to the little level of fame you’ve got…

YOu do what you can when you are at events you know paparazzi are going to be at…

Subtly pull out that tit…that big and amazing tit…because people want to see it…but you can’t make it obvious, it’ll look desperate…even though we already know she’s desperate…right…but not as desperate as me for posting her tits like they matter, because everything in my life is far more pathetic than this….this is actually the high point, but why kill myself, when I can just laugh at how bad it gets and hope for a natural disaster.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Rita Ora|SFW

2015

08

Jul

The Tits from Blurred Line Video in One of her Last Campaigns of the Day

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In case you were wondering, Emily Ratajkowski may not be relevant anymore, people may have forgotten she exists, she may still be getting some shitty little we jobs in the process of falling off, and she may be getting cameo’s in movies that are out of touch and just trying to tackle what they assume people are into…without actually knowing what people are into…and she’s still got tits.

Which pretty much means, she’ll be ok…

Not because a woman is defined by her tits, her relevance defined by her tits, her existene defined by her tits…I am a firm believer that women are amazing, and can be smart and powerful and inspiring…but not so much when they lower their worth to their tits..because when they do..they become just tits…and I guess in Emily Ratajkowski’s case..they are pretty good tits….

I wouldn’t mind catching her as she falls, you know with my mouth…even though I’m sure she’s been in some weird places…in this short lived career.

Posted in:Emily Ratajkowski|SFW

2015

08

Jul

Jennifer Lawrence Walking Up Stairs at an Expensive Condo of the DAy

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So Jennifer Lawrence is shopping for an apartment in NYC….the development is called the 445 Greenwhich and I guess she’s being pitched on Penthouse F…

According to my friend Steve – The most expensive penthouse is OVER 50 MILLION DOLLARS …

Which is a nice reminder that if you’re nominated for a bunch of Oscars for the hit movies you participate in and probably have a backend piece of…we’re talking all the movies she’s been nominated for Oscars in…while maintaining a series of blockbusters movies like Hunger Games…which you probably have a piece of the backend on…you can actually make stupid money as an actress…

So all you actresses out there making SAG rate of 60k per movie, need to channel your inner J.Law…cuz bitch is winning at fucking life apparently…and I’m all about her, not because of her quirky likeable scam or her acting ability, but rather…because of her hot tits we saw in her nudes…she’s a winner..and she’s winning..kill yourself

Update:

Penthouse F 15.25 mil. Unless she got paid to carry that folio around. The hype machine never sleeps!

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jennifer Lawrence|SFW

2015

08

Jul

Elisabeth Erm for Glamour France August of the DAy

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I don’t know who Elisabeth Erm is…I just know I like her…but that’s not saying much, you know when you look like Elisabeth Erm…it is hard to not like her…

She’s born in 1993. She’s Estonian, which according to my Estonian friend, means relatively common there…but more importantly affordable to own…Sure robably not now that she’s in big magazines, but there are probably more of her, maybe bootleg versions of her, but still better than the American version of her, which is eating donuts while working at Walmart or some shit…you know the kind of girl you can lure in with citizenship alone…even when you’re broke, pathetic, etc…makes things pretty fucking easy but I got married to some pig before realizing that…just another example of my failures…

Posted in:Elisabeth Erm|SFW

2015

08

Jul

Josephine Skriver for Victoria’s Secret of the Day

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Hybrid, test tube, baby created in a lab by some gay dude…who I assume was either a narcissist, as gay guys tend to be, ready to use his scientific background to reproduce, and to have his DNA live on in the form of a fashion model…that all the men will want…that may even get him into the all the right parties…like Leonardo DiCaprio orgies…as sometimes dreams come true…

I like to think he was commissioned by Victoria’s Secret to create her, but they’ll never let you know that…cloning…

She’s from Denmark – here are the Danish cloning laws…I am going to assume it is legal… HERE

Here are her pics…