DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2014

03

Dec

Faith Picozzi for Tamara Lichtenstein of the Day

Her name is FAITH PICOZZI ….I used to talk to her…but then she gave up on our love as all girls I talk to do within the first 4 minutes of talking to me…after I verbally and mentally rape them with my charm….but that doesn’t mean I don’t still love her and her amazing and beautiful redheaded body…that I think should be famous and that I am suprised is not famous…after being in the scene for what must be 5 years…

That said, I am in love with her and these pics by Tamara Lichtenstein are’t bad.

Posted in:Faith Picozzi

2014

03

Dec

Naomi Campbell is Still Hot of the Day

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Someone once told me that Black Don’t Crack…

I don’t know if that was a racist statement, or one based on the strong genetics of the black people, who never age…

But I do know that Naomi Campbell is still looking amazing, and she must be in her late 50s…which is impressive, but necessary in her seducing billionaire Russian husbands to sugar daddy her, because even rich girls need sugar daddies, it’s all part of the model psychology…

That’s all I have to say about that..

Posted in:Naomi Campbell

2014

03

Dec

K Mart’s Pregnant Woman Dancing Porn of the Day

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K Mart is being clever in their marketing, because they are K Mart, and no one gives a fuck about K-Mart, and if they do, they probably are too poor to have a computer to see their clever marketing campaigns, but they did throw something out there that’s a little more aggressive than the white trash ghetto bullshit you would assume they reach, unless you’re like me and you find pregnancy in general to be pretty ghetto…it’s like “bitch couldn’t afford the abortion”…right?

That said, pregnant girls dancing gets me in the Christmas spirt…because I know they didn’t get pregnant by me…

Speaking of ready to drop porn – here’s a Kourtney Kardashian showing her tits…because she’s a Kardashian and they’re whores..K-Mart grade whores…because the people who shop at K-Mart made them…

Posted in:Videos

2014

03

Dec

Kristina by Jesse Koska of the Day

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Jesse Koska is apparently a photographer, and this is a shoot she did of some Russian or Eastern European model who I guess is signed to an agency in LA, who should be showing more nipple for this stage in her career, but who is still half naked, dabbling with being half naked, and breaking hearts, or at least boners, in these pantyhose erotica that is probably not meant to be masturbated to, but should be masturbated, because everything deserves to be sexualized sometimes.

Posted in:Kristina

2014

03

Dec

Lara Stone is Slutty for Versace of the Day

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Lara Stone tried to sue me for posting honeymoon pics of her big tits in a bikini, when she’s normally got her big tits exposed for work, I guess it was her “private time” and they are just self-involved cunts who think they deserve privacy…

I prefer her BIG TITS FOR FASHION

But this Versace weirdo erotica probably paid better…

Posted in:Lara Stone

2014

03

Dec

Gisele in Jeans of the Day

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I figure since the Victoria’s Secret infomercial was filmed yesterday and everyone was excited, because models in lingerie on primetime TV is so fucking exciting for people who have never heard of internet porn…or google…and who instead buy into overhyped events for mall stores that exploit the youth of China by making them work factories, and the youth of America, into thinking that being a bikini model is the only fucking answer….and that 10 dollar thongs are all it takes…

So here’s Gisele in Jeans…still getting work…

Posted in:Gisele

2014

03

Dec

The Bai Ling Nipple of the Day

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Bai Ling disappeared from the world…to be forgotten…because even when she’s crying for attention for a decade flashing her tits and vagina to the world…the very few onlookers who take the time to watch the trainwreck, don’t get emotionally vested in the trainwreck, and let her fade away…

Now she’s back…doing the exact same thing…and I can’t imagine anyone really cares…but I’ll post it, because long Asian nipples on some nobody who people seem to care about are my dream…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

HERE SHE IS IN A BIKINI

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Bai Ling

2014

03

Dec

Emily Bett Rickards Is Some Canadian in a Bikini of the Day

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Apparently Emily Bett Rickards is some Canadian Actress, born in 1991, who works for the CW…in some show I’ve never seen because I dont’ fuck with with…I’ve never heard of her…but I can tell you one thing I do know about her…and that is that she takes shitty fucking bikini selfies for instagram…maybe they don’t have Instagram sluts in Canada, but I am from Canada and would argue that they do…and I am probably friends with all of them…step up your game three name…

Posted in:Emily Bett Rickards

2014

03

Dec

Ana Beatriz Barros in Horrible Bikini Pics of the Day

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Ana Beatriz Barros is a Victoria’s Secret model, one of those Brazilian, might be a tranny, because that’s what the casting director at Victoria’s Secret was into in the late 90s…you can never really tell with trannies these days, at least 5 trannies have right swiped me on tinder, I am not into dabbling with that…but a lot of dudes are, 6 out of 10 of the top selling porns are tranny porns and there has to be a reason for that, a reason I don’t understand, because I would take a titless girl with a vagina over a big titty dude with a dick but maybe I am the weird one…statistically…I am..

All this to say, these are the worst catalog lingerie pics I’ve ever seen…ever…

Posted in:Ana Beatriz Barros

2014

03

Dec

Abbey Clancy is December 3 for Love Magazines Advent of the Day

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Nothing screams Christmas like a model washing a car, because that would probably be the only time you’d ever be able to convince a model to wash a car, at least if you were a billionaire she was trying to prove she wasn’t just a gold digger for, unless she spent all her money on coke…which I doubt, since models get coke for free…

Point being, everyday is Christmas when you get to stare at girls like this…doing things like this…and you don’t need a birth of Jesus or a tree to jerk off to it…right…

I don’t know it that was the actual point I wanted to make…but either way…this may not be anything Christmas, but then again either is Christmas, but it is a Christmas miracle..

Love Magazine

Posted in:Abbey Clancy