DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2014

22

Sep

Alicia Keys Naked and Pregnant of the Day

Want to know something that I’ve never ever wanted to see in the history of my existence…I’m talking not in 2001 when her big song made her a breakout star…and not now… Alicia Keys nude, pregnant or not, promoting anything…

If anything, she’s the kind of girl who might as well not be a girl to me…and I don’t know why – I am sure she’s sweet, and lovely, like all these rich and famous people with staff and handlers are…and I am sure someone out there finds her hot…but for me…someone who will look at anyone naked…and I mean anyone…I mean you should see some of the girls I have gone down on, you’d throw up…but for some reason…a reason beyond pregnancy..this does nothing to me…and I guess that’s why I am compelled to post it…

Posted in:Alicia Keys

2014

22

Sep

Carolina Cruz in a Cheesy Swimsuit Catalog Shoot of the Day

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I would say that 95 percent of the time I see a lingerie or swimsuit catalog shoot, no matter who the model is, the pictures are cheesy as fuck….

Now I don’t know who Carolina Cruz is, but I’ll assume not related to Penelope Cruz, and I don’t care how hot she looks in a bikini…and I don’t know who the swim company is, and I don’t care how much they spent on this..I just know that there’s nothing hot, interesting, or even good about these pics…even with the half naked girl in it…

They remind me of some cheesy flea market pervert with a camera luring girls for glamour shots because it’s his weirdo fetish..only those flea market pics would have probably been better concept..because perverts, even talentless perverts, who produce shitty pervert photos, with no real vision or talent – can do better than this…I know because I am one of those guys…but my iPhone always throws off my fake studio set up…come it was a free upgrade…baby…who needs real cameras…it’s the instagram era…

Posted in:Carolina Cruz

2014

22

Sep

Taylor Swift Panty Flash of the Day

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Apparently, this is a Taylor Swift panty flash. I don’t know if it has to do with the brightness on the computer I am using, you know since I found it in a dumpster, but I can’t see any panties in this pic, there are probably other angles, HERE but I am too lazy to look…

I am just going to assume that there is Panty, because Taylor Swift is growing up, you know coming of age story of a girl who is into experimenting with her sexuality and then singing about it, whether it is running through all kinds of random dudes who she pretends on her boyfriend for the media because it is acceptable…to spending a lot of time fanning out with a Victoria’s Secret model…to now making pop songs about shaking her ass…it’s just a matter of time before this good girl, who has given up all her privacy for a 100 or more million dollars a year, full throws in the towel and shows vagina…

It’s like the only real controversial celebrity nude leak – is right here – it just hasn’t happened yet…but when it does…it’ll be bigger than Jennifer Lawrence’s big tits…

In the mean time, try to find her panties, it’s a modern day Where’s Waldo…

TO SEE ALL THE TAYLOR SWIFT PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Taylor Swift

2014

22

Sep

Pippa Middleton’s Bikini Ass of the Day

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Pippa Middleton disappoints me. I had such high hope for her to lose her shit after her sister became the future queen, without realizing that her sister being the future queen probably allows her to get on payroll and be part of the fun, without any of the real work…while I just thought it meant that she’d have middle-child syndrome, of feeling like nothing she does in life will be good enough, because her wife gold dug her way to the top like a fucking master…you know stuck in her one bedroom apartment, filling the void with drugs and cock, but the truth is – she probably gets to be just as fancy and live just as luxurious a life and her whoring and drugs can be done in the privacy of villas in beautiful locations….so there’s no need to go out there and humiliate the family to get a little attention of her own…except maybe in bikini pics…and the whole thing could have been way more fun, controversial and exciting…now all I see is disappointment, when the disappointment I wanted from Pippa was from the Royal Family and her parents…oh well…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Pippa Middleton

2014

22

Sep

Ariana Grande’s Panty Flash of the Day

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Everyone is so concerned with this popstar chick Ariana Grande, and not for having a porn name, but rather for having a bad attitude towards her fans, because they don’t understand most famous people don’t actually care about their fans, they just like the attention their fans give them. It all stems from having horrible parents that throw them into this world at a young age, making them competitive and more importantly confident enough to do what they do through positive affirmation, you know to keep baby going to the auditions, and spoiling them as reward because they are the meal ticket….making for a pretty awful person – with an ego – who feels entitled to all that comes her way….

I think it’s probably a publicity stunt to make her edgy, even though she fucks black dudes, which to white people everywhere – is as edgy as a girl can get…

I also think I’m more into her panty flashes on stage…because she has a hot body and her celebrity doesn’t interest me at all…her fall from celebrity when she turns to porn in a decade does…and in the meantime the panty flashes are good enough to tide me over.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Ariana Grande

2014

22

Sep

Jessica Simpson Looks Skinny and Hot of the Day

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There is hope in the world for fat girls everywhere – that if you are offered a million dollars or more for a campaign based on your post pregnancy weight, you will hire trainers and chefs to make sure that you are getting all the nutrients you need, while getting ripped…I mean there are also doctors and hormone therapy and all kind of science that can take you from being the BBQ Boat that was Jessica Simpson to being this fit, in her 30s, mom of two…it’s amazing what a little forced motivation from your team and lots of money can do to your emotional eating…

So what’s your excuse fatty…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jessica Simpson

2014

22

Sep

Jamie Chung Bikini in Costa Rica of the Day

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I don’t know who Jamie Chung is, but she reminds me that I’ve never had sex with an asian, even though I’ve always wanted to have sex with an Asian, ever since I was since I was a kid and told Asians had sideways vaginas.

Sure, I know you can buy sex with an Asian for very cheap, if you just go to the legal rub and tugs around every city in the world, because Asians are everywhere…rub and tugs that aren’t considered hookers because it’s up on some holistic shit that some insurance companies cover …I mean you don’t even have to go on that long and expensive flight to Asia for that shit anymore…Sex tourism is in your own backyard…

That said, I don’t know this Jamie Chung girl, I just got lost staring at her ass in a bikini…She’s apparently a reality star turned real actor in her 30s, which in asian age, since they are aliens from the future, that’s the equivalant of 12 in body and tightness…

Posted in:Jamie Chung

2014

22

Sep

Ashley Tisdale’s Yoga Pose of the Day

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Recently married Ashley Tisdale, the face that gives girls hope that if they manage to figure out how to be a hollywood starlet with a lot of money, they too will find love despite their possible flaws that may or may not throw off a man…or more importantly that they are insecure about…

Not that any girl should really care about her face in this era, because really it’s all about how good your ass looks, what your hip to waist ratio is, and even your tits, and what angles you take of yourself on your social media. As long as you can fake it, with fake hair, make-up and all that other bullshit, all while putting out good, you’re perfect.

It’s like a pretty face once mattered, maybe, but not anymore, because you don’t fuck the face, and when you do, you’re more into the strain and pain and discomfort in her eyes, and not whether she’s got a wonky fucking nose, you don’t jerk off to the face, you save that for jerking off on, after you go for the close up butthole shot, and really a face doesn’t even need to exist…as long as you’re not mutated or a freak, you’re good.

I mean, I think this Yoga Post, a popular instagram trend, proves that….science…

To see pics of her at the grocery store CLICK HERE

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale

2014

22

Sep

Amber Heard Has the Best Picture of the Day

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There are a ton of pictures of Amber Heard circulating topless. But this one makes me laugh the most. I don’t need tits to get off, I actually can’t really get off to tits, because I am not 12. Plus I can’t imagine her getting her Lawyers on me for posting this pic of the bunch. I mean…it is the clothed one…and it just makes me laugh, because it is hard to deny the authenticity of the pics, with her clever little sign, that took some effort, trying to makeher man happy on set, you know since she knows how Johnny Depp works on set, it’s kind of how she homewrecked his home…hard to feel sorry for her…

She’s not new to the whole using her sexuality to get ahead, for a while she was a lesbian, back before home wrecking, and I guess now that she’s won and her relationship is legitimate, so now people feel bad for her, when they should celebrate her because she’s hot as hell…especially seeing how her seduces her man in a way you wish her or anyone would never take the effort to to for you…. cute signs is new spread ass….

Posted in:Amber Heard

2014

22

Sep

Possible Candice Swanepoel Behind the Scenes Pics of the Day

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There is no real way to know whether these Candice Swanepoel pics are legit or not. I mean they look like at least three girls I’ve had sex with recently, and sure I have sex with models, or at least girls with model bodies, because why the fuck not, so that’s not really saying much, other than all girls should look like this, and if they don’t they don’t count as girls…

I don’t know if this is part of any celebrity nude leak, I mean if they are legit. I figure I’ll know if the lawyers come knocking, but really why would they. She’s naked in her fashion work as is. I can google “Candice Vag” and find it nicely shot, professionaly…the idea of selfies, is just to make these people seem more real to you, even though you’ll never meet them.

Meaning, her fashion stuff is far hotter as a picture, nude selfies, hotter as a concept…and these ones are not offensive, filled with dick, spread eagled and just lovely…even if they aren’t Candice…I am a fan.

Seriously – amazing…aint nothing wrong with any of this..

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel