DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2014

01

Jul

Genevieve Morton in Lingerie of the Day

The scam is working! People are finally hiring her for work. Now I don’t know how much they are paying her, or if they are paying her, maybe she’s just doing it for free food, because based on her body, I am going to assume she likes food…a lot…maybe even too much…

Last week SHE HAD HER NIPPLE IN SOME CATALOG

THis week, more lingerie, like how did this happen…it was only 3 weeks ago when people would say “Who the fuck is Genevieve Morton you keep calling fat and useless”…and I’d say…”Some opportunist gold digger who scammed her way into Sports Illustrated because they needed a South African girl because that’s a strong market for them, but who never was able to get a job or relevance like Kate Upton despite all the press they got her, and despite her huge tits”…and then they would say “why do you know this, you’re a fucking loser, you shouldn’t know about useless people and their life stories unless you are fucking them”…and I agree.

Here’s her lingerie shoot…

Posted in:Genevieve Morton

2014

01

Jul

Aymeline Valade Nipples for Vanity Fair France of the Day

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I am not going to research this model Aymeline Valade…Her name is ridiculous and I have posted her Tit for Fashion at least once before, which to me means she’s relevant enough, and I guess Vanity Fair France agrees with, as they should…because I am an expert at this stuff…I’ve made a shitty fucking life out of it…and I have the curse of telling people I have a blog, like i”m a 15 year old girl who doesn’t have her driver’s license yet, and has no choice but to blog to entertain herself…only unlike a 15 year old girl…I am not fun to look at myself in the mirror while I masturbate during some teenage self discover…if anything I am scary.

These pics of Aymeline Valade aren’t that great – but nipple carries them for me…and for you.

Posted in:Aymeline Valade

2014

01

Jul

Gwyneth Paltrow Playing Hollywood Legends for Max Factor of the Day

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I am going to assume that Gwyneth Paltrow got paid a million dollars or more to do this campaign for Max Factor cosmetics….and I got paid zero to promote it…because the world is not fair, there is an injustice and that’s ok.

If you’re wondering why I am posting it, it’s because I like the arrogance, or how presumptuous it is of Gwyneth to pose as Audrey Hepburn and Brigette Bardot….I mean even if it wasn’t her idea, there is no way that this rich kid who got daddy to hook her up with work, that led to more work is ever going to be a Hollywood Classic, the reality is, if she wasn’t always talking about herself, no one would even remember her or any of her work…

I can’t imagine in 40 years people masturbating to any of her work, in fact I can’t imagine anyone masturbating to any of her work now. I don’t even think Brad Pitt jerks off to memories of fucking her when he hides in the bathroom for some alone time….

THis level of obnoxious entertains me…and it is all about me people.

Posted in:gwyneth paltrow

2014

01

Jul

Vanessa Hudgens Bikini for Instagram of the Day

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Vanessa Hudgens posted a bikini pic of her hiking to some beautiful and lovely place where she stripped down and jumped into a swimming hole…in some hipster high on acid pretending they are a hippie despite living in a 2 or more million dollar home staffed by mexican gardeners, cleaning ladies and personal chefs, because that’s what being rich and famous is about, pretending you really grasp life and that you are down to earth because you didn’t fucking shower…and cuz you eat organic fucking granola bars in designer clothes that feel like hand me downs because they were given to you but still are designer clothes. Fuck you.

Anyway, no one seemed to care that this picture happened, and I think she was upset about it, because the paparazzi took pics of her and she kept hiding her face, probably crying from the last week of feeling like no one cares…

Well I care, I encourage bikini pics, like I encourage nudes, but she’s already done those, I’d kind of like her to do it again…you see the ice has been broken…step it up and you will matter.

TO SEE HER HIDING HER FACE IN ALL KINDS OF CRAFTY WAYS BECAUSE I ASSUME SHE EITHER HAS A HERPE OR SHE HAS HAD HER LIPS DONE OR SHE IS FEELING MANGLE-FACED
CLICK HERE

Posted in:Vanessa Hudgens

2014

01

Jul

Lily Allen Too Old for a Panty Flash at Galstonbury of the Day

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This reminds me of a song, I think the lyrics go “Into the great wide open”….but I could be wrong…there may not be a song with those lyrics…but rather just the lyrics my not very musical ass hears when I see the great, horrible, frightening abyss that is Lily Allen post child bearing / miscarriage and abortion, pussy in panties….

It’s like we get, you were the fat rich girl no one thought was hot so you stepped up your game and got famous, but when you were famous you were still just the fat rich girl everyone though made fun songs, but still thought was fat.

Never the popstar, despite album sales and success…but after finding a comfortable place in her body, maybe 2 babies and a half too late – she decides to be that poptart she always wanted to be…only this time by mocking it, because even she knows that her twerking on stage is a fucking joke, even if she wishes it was serious….

Either way, put some damn pants on.

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TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Lily Allen

2014

01

Jul

Gisele Bundchen Dominatrix for Balenciaga of the Day

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Gisele Bundchen is the new face…or the new “man face”…because if you’re an asshole like me, who sees male features in a woman rumored to have been born with a penis and fired from Victoria’s Secret for having a penis, which ties in nicely to her gay jock loving anal because it reminds him of locker-room initiation….

Now I’m not saying Gisele is a dude, or Tom Brady is a homo…I am just saying it like that to an outsider and it is not even a big deal, everyone’s fucking gay now, and I Gisele’s body is banging, the kind of tranny even the straightest dude would fuck, so who cares…

Here are her high fashion Balenciaga ads, because there is life after Victoria’s Secret, and she reminds me of a mid century german dominatrix, not really my thing, but kind of erotic without seeing her half naked, naked or stroking her dick.

Posted in:Gisele Bundchen

2014

01

Jul

Miley Cyrus’ Stripper Mom in a Bikini of the Day

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You have to look at Miley and then look at Miley’s dad…and do the math…..

So Miley was born November 1992.

Achey Breaky, which is what put Billy Ray on the map as released January 1992.

So motherfucker was two months in, maybe even one month into the whole being famous as fuck touring game when he knocked her stripper mom up.

So you can assume a white trash country singing sell out, and the type of woman he attracts, when thrown a lot of money, will raise their kids horrible.

There is no doubt in my mind that groupie Trish Cyrus, was just like all other groupies, only smart enough to not use a condom, because it sure was better to have a rich hick with money, than work giving lap dances…

I can just tell by her tattoo that Miley posted on her instagram….of Trashy Stripper Mommy in a bikini…

I guess this makes me an investigative journalist…

Posted in:Miley Cyrus

2014

01

Jul

This Just In – Izabel Goulart is Working Out of the Day

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Here’s another one of those intsagram fitness videos of Izabel Goulart everyone loves to watch because it’s like the opening scene of a porno movie, sometimes half naked, sometimes in slow motion, and always good for the health…

The reality is that the girl has limited options as to what she can post being pretty much retired…and working out is all she really does, so it makes sense, and people like it…

But all I keep thinking is..Jesus she’s got herself some big feet.

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

01

Jul

Topless Girl Videobombs TV and Other VIdeos of the Day

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Drunk Guy Gets His Face Run Over When Taking a Nap like an Idiot

Really Stupid Waterslide

People Don’t Like Having Their Pics Taken by a Guy Taking Selfie

The Man who Farted At the World cup

Naked Swede Buying Milk

Posted in:Videos

2014

01

Jul

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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I was walking behind this little tight bodied Avril Lavigne looking thing, in a tight as fuck tank top, rocking’ an amazing hip to waist ratio, but more importantly a pair of those ass cheek exposing shorts that all the girls are wearing, because the’ve gone officially mainstream….so fat as fuck me, decides to get my cardio in, to get a closer look, like I love the ass but need to see the tits, kind of thing, in a there’s no way this girl doesn’t do porn kind of way…

Despite my heart and my physical ability, I get in close enough, sweating…feeling like I’ve either escaped death, or I am about to die…

And it turns out she was 14.

Hormones in the food get me every fucking time.

Harry Potter Walking the Dogs While Smoking is the Best Pic ever
GO

I love this Dolly Performance from the Weekend
GO

Bieber DICK PIC vs Selena Gomez Cameltoe
GO

The Craziest Mike Tyson Stories Ever
GO

Girls Tugging At their Clothes
GO

FIND COUGARS TO FUCK!
GO

Tilda Swinton Scares the Fuck Out of Me of the Day
GO

Start the Day with Some Ridiculous Beach Stretching from some fame whore
GO

Jill Martin Hard Nipples in a Bikini!
GO

Hot Chicks Surfing!
GO

World’s Tallest Waterslide!
GO

So Many Girls Getting Their Fuck On…
GO

The Pic from Bieber’s Rager is Funny…
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS