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2012

27

Dec

Stephanie Seymour Hot Tits in a One Piece of the Day

Stephanie Seymour’s big fake tit, ex model, pushing 50, mom of 10, fucked by many rockstar, body has been squeezed into a one piece and I think she looks fucking lovely….you see cuz there comes a time in every fat chick or old ladies life where she says no to the 2 piece, because the 2 piece, like in the 80s, is meant for a specific kind of chick, one with a body that supports it, but that in Politically correct, everyone is fat in the 2000s, where every motherfucker started wearing a bikini, even if they didn’t belong in one, thanks to shit like the Jersey Shore…

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Posted in:Stephanie Seymour

2012

27

Dec

Michelle Keegan’s in a Bikini Photoshoot of the Day

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Michelle Keegan is on Cornation Street, likely one of the longest running, pile of shit tv shows to come out of the UK, and that people who live in Canada were forced to watch, when they didn’t have cable, because our only free channel played the horrible show….that was shot like a fucking porn…that was about the working class chimney sweeper in the UK….that was pretty fucking ghetto…with old, chain smoking, toothless stars with thick accents, but I guess they’ve rebranded with this hot enough pussy, you know since she is from the UK and the UK isn’t really known for making babes….and here she is modeling bikinis.

Posted in:Michelle Keegan

2012

27

Dec

Chloe Green is my New Best Friend and She’s in a Bikini of the Day

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The DailyMail put up a couple of paparazzi pics of the daughter of retailing giants from the UK, we’re talking outrageously rich jewish family, who bring in Beyonce to play at their birthday parties kinda rich, Chloe Green, wearing a hot yellow bikini….and for some reason I was following her on twitter because before yesterday I didn’t know who she was, because despite the ridiculously rich loving me, I generally don’t keep tabs…

That said, she was hurt by the comments left on the Daily Mail about her body in a bikini, when all she wanted to be a normal girl on the beach, but unlike America, the ridiculously rich are followed by the paparazzi like celebrities of their own, even when they aren’t on TV, and thus she got torn a new asshole, one I wouldn’t mind kissing gently…you know to heal the wounds….

So I told her not to listen to the haters, that I look at bikinis all the time and that I am the biggest judge, and that she’s a solid 7, spreading my honest dose of love everyday, with nothing but good intentions….

This is what she wrote me…..which would really hurt me, if I had a soul…some people just aren’t appreciative of this guy right here….

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Posted in:Chloe Green

2012

27

Dec

Ashlee Simpson’s Teen Mom Ass in a Bikini Bottom of the Day

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This is just typical behavior from a girl who’s parents are going through a divorce cuz her dad is gay, you know spreading her ass on the internet in a bikini bottom, just cock teasing for perverts like you to give her attention her daddy never gave her cuz she had a vagina, but more importantly, because she wasn’t the cute daughter relatives wanted to molest, but I guess we already knew that back when she was baby making in her teens to get attention…..and now all I can think is “thanks for not showing us lip, cuz there’s no way that vagina isn’t as ravaged as you’d imagine it would be, thanks to the whole birthing process….decent legs though…

Just be glad this isn’t Jessica Simpson’s ass…because…it will probably eat you like an all you can eat buffet….you know taking food in from both ends just to get it inside her….and not in a good way…in an obese chick way….

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Posted in:Ashlee Simpson

2012

27

Dec

Martha Hunt in Aerie Lingerie of the Day

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I don’t know who the fuck Martha Hunt it – but Luckily, who she is really doesn’t fucking matter….it is what she does that matters and she does lingerie modeling…and looks pretty fucking good while doing it…..cuz that body is a wonderland…a winter fucking wonderland…it’s just unfortunate for her that her name is Martha…one name that sounds like vomiting….

Posted in:Martha Hunt

2012

27

Dec

Camille Rowe in some Artistic Lingerie Pics of the Day

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I don’t know about you but I like my “lingerie” pics with a lot less artistic vision, and a lot more spread vagina….

Camille Rowe is a hot model who is totally down with getting naked, why not use that skillset, you know that key tool she’s got in her model tool kit, you know cuz using anything but that is like hiring a hooker to play cards with you, or a carpenter to empty your fucking dishwasher…you see sure they can do it…but why the fuck would you want them to.

That said, she’s still a babe…

Posted in:Camille Rowe

2012

27

Dec

Claudia Galanti is Fun of the Day

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Claudia Galanti is fun. You know she really gets the concept of being on the beach….and it’s not to play frisbee or paddle ball or even to sit in the water…it is to mount your man, hide under a towel, and simulate sex….because when you’re not doing that….you’re not doing justice to your fake tits or hooker, attention seeking amazingness…

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Posted in:Claudia Galanti

2012

27

Dec

Hayden Panettiere’s Fake Tits Understand Marketing of the Day

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Hayden Panettiere may be a spoiled brat, LA, candy coated twat who doesn’t really have any idea what is up, cool, interesting, but who instead just buys into all the crap other people are buying into, because by the time it gets to her, it’s already too late….that’s just the way Hollywood rich kids work….despite how hard they try to be different, unique, cutting edge….

But she does get one thing, that tits fucking sell, so here she is promoting her product line, acting like a lesbian hipster, showing some bra, and some cleavage from her new fake tits, you know making noise….what someone needs to tell her is that if using tits to get sales…you gotta use them nipples….cleavage just isn’t enough…for this pervert world.

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere

2012

27

Dec

Miranda Kerr Victoria’s Secret Lingerie of the Day

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Miranda Kerr is the kind of fertile woman I wouldn’t make take her pill in front of me before sex, you know the kind of fertile woman who I would replace her birth control pills she’d likely insist on taking like all girls who have sex with me, for fear of bringing my spawn to life, with a fucking tic tac or mentos, because she’s the kind of body, I’d like to breed with, and I am the kind of guy who hates the idea of breeding…you know since this world is a horrible fucking place….

Unfortunately for me, Miranda Kerr, despite being Australian and cool, is likely not gonna be hitting me up asking for sex, pretty much ever….not even when she’s old, fat and divorced, because we run in different circles,….so I guess I’m forced to just mail her model agency vials of my semen and hope they go to the right place….her uterus….

Posted in:Miranda Kerr

2012

27

Dec

Natalia Siwiec Fake Titty Sexy Lingerie Shoot of the Day

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This is a pretty elegant shoot of some model named Natalia Siwiec…It’s up on some Eyes Wide Shut, 50 Shades of Grey, naughty adult game inspiring lingerie with masks and gloves and top hats and canes like the Monopoly Man and shit, in a luxury setting, with gold ornate mirrors and double doors, it almost makes me think Natalia Siwiec is anything but a eastern european male order bride…with a rockin’ body and some big fake tits….

Posted in:Natalia Siwiec