Some days very little excitement happens….and other days I stare at the public pool and stare at mothers and teen daughters equally…in their slutty bikinis and short shorts…because that’s what family is all about…at least family planning…you know finding a hot mom you can swap out with her daughter once the mom expires and the […]

I woke up at 6 in the morning and instead of doing something productive, like try to make money to buy myself shit like sugar babies… I just texted every girl I came across on instagram, snap, tinder, my imessages because I have an apple as I am current, now, trendy…..this important message… “You give […]

The move of the day is to fuck a random hooker, take a picture of her nasty asshole with your unprotected dick in her rank pussy, and caption it “wish you were her”…and send it to every girl you want to fuck…let them know you get pussy…it will impress them knowing you get laid and […]

It’s a long weekend, so why the fuck are you on a computer and not at a pool, even a public pool watching the slutty moms who can’t afford pools of their own….forcing them to swim in other kid piss…wearing bikinis…and we like bikinis…or you could go to some campground and terrorize people in tents […]

I shit on Sugar Babies all the time…But I am pretty much a sugar baby…because I don’t pay for anything, I live off my pig wife, who I am sure is a lovely person, if you don’t know her, don’t have to listen to her sleep apnea, don’t have to smell her, don’t have to […]

The problem with dating an inmate from an inmate dating site other than that they are really annoying to sext with because their computer time is controlled, in an era where all girls are willing to sext and that the only reason you’d have to go get dirty with an inmate is because you fear […]

I don’t know why women complain about men using them for sex. I would be very happy if a woman used me for sex… Because I like to think my mouth is a trained Pussy assassin…and should be used accordingly… Even if I’m disgusting, impotent and smell from not showering… I figured since they can’t […]

My biggest life regret is not being a pimp…. I figure if I was the middle man between girls who are sucking dick for money – because they like money and sucking dick – something they are going to be doing for free anyway….I would live a much more fulfilling life…you know helping girls live […]

I fail most times I try to convince my neighbors, who are two 20 year old roomates, to finger each other’s assholes on snapchat… but I feel that with will and determination, if I intend for it to happen, and will for it to happen, it will eventually happen… Because we are resilient… We can […]

My new pickup line is telling girls that I would go down on them for an hour, but I know they won’t let me, so I’ll just go jerk off in the bathroom thinking about them, and then I get up and walk to the bathroom, where I pretend to jerk off, to really drive […]