Victoria Silvstedt is an angel sprung onto us from heaven. Her class, breed and work ethic are things we should alla admire. Victoria Silvstedt is a natural beauty that few women can compete with and few men come close to. She is a talent in her craft and all these factors combined make her the stepWOMAN of the year. If Victoria Silvstedt was a painting, she would be a Dogs Playing Poker. If she was a song, she would be “Meatloaf – I would do anything for love”. If she was an alcoholic beverage, she would be sparkling wine. If she was a flower, she would be one freshly picked off a grave after a funeral. If she was a disease, she’d be Pancreatic Cancer, the expensive kind. If she was a car she’d be a Volvo, because she is Swedish and a Safe bet. If she was something you can buy at a drugstore, she’d be Depends. If she was a fruit, she’d be a Tomato. Either way, she is in my heart and I love her. We were almost sued by this glorious woman and her lawyer reads this site and asked me not to “slander” her anymore. This post was my first attempt at not slandering someone. How’d I do. Fuckers.