So in the bar this weekend, while drunk, I got to talking to some girl I never saw before. She told me she was in town meeting some guy she met online and when she got to the bus stop where she was supposed to meet him, she saw some really fat greasy dude who looked like he hadn’t got laid, but had been masturbating all day over the last 10 years, so she booked a hotel and ended up the bar I was at. So I knew bitch was desperate, but not desperate enough to compromise her integrity. We got to talking about all kinds of things from her kids and her job and I realized within a minute why she turned to the internet to find love, because there is no human out there who could stomach her fairy tale wants and her annoying voice and pretty much everything about her made me want to die, not to be dramatic or anything. I decided to try to have fun with her and I busted out a napkin and told her to show me what her pussy looked like by folding the paper, sure it was a weird request but I didn’t have any other art supplies with me and instead of her just giving up on the stupid vagina model idea, and pull down her pants like a normal girl would, she made a fucking origami bird and that’s when I wished her a good trip home and to watch out for creeps from the internet, seeing as I was a professional one, I felt it was my place.
Here are my links….
Dance Dance Dance Fall
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Wino is BReaking Down One Body Part at a Time
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Some Playboy Playmate from 2007 Gives You Losers Some First Date Tips
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Madeline Zima Has Hard Nipples
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Some Anna Kornikova is Always Nice
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Do Something Worthwhile Today That Doesn’t Involve Getting Out of Bed…But Does Involve Seeing Pussy and Telling it What to Do
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Tori Wilson is a WWE Slut
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Robots Can’t Act
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The Best Porn You’ll Watch All Day
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Let’s Get Sloppy
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Paul McCartney Is Making a Revenge Album
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OJ Simpson is Guilty. Wow, I Am so Shocked
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Finding Girls to Fuck Isn’t As Hard As You Think
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Girls Aloud Nip Slip
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Dina Lohan is Just Amazing
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Jessica Alba is Flashing Her Pubes
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Fuck I Thought I Ate Fast
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Finally, someone Who Understands How Much I Hate Exercising
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Tram Goes Way Out of Control
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I Forgive Salma Hayek For Ruining Her Vagina With a Baby, Because It Has Done Wonders For Her Chest
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Let’s Go to the Model Ball
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Why Hello Lindsay Marie
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Gina Caragano Can Fight Me Anytime
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Another Brick in the Wall
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Amateurs All the Way
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Paris Hilton Needs to Be Stopped From Reproducing
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Angelina Is Loking Good After Just Having Had Twins
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If Facebook Was Real Life
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Even When She’s Just Being a Mother, Kate Beckinsale is Tasty
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Jodie Marsh is Just Giving It Away
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Striptease of the Day
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Topless Fashion Show? I’m Into That
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Lipstick on a Pig. On Drugs
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Use this Spray to Get Laid
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Tina Fey Does Palin Once Again for the Presidential Debates. Amazing
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THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING POSTED ON CRAIGSLIST EVER
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Adriana Lima Poses in a Magazine I Don’t Care to Know the Name Of
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Marta Enjoys the Coast While We Enjoy Marta
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Nicolette Sheridan is Lookin’ Good
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Lindsay and Paris Are Having a Cat Fight
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Let’s Look At Some Art, Since I know For The Most Part We Are Too Cultureless to Do So
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A Day in the Life of Mario
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I Think I Should Celebrity Box Michael Lohan
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Some Jenna Jameson and Brea Bennet
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Dance Like a Stripper
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Paris Hilton in Vegas for Her Sister’s Birthday
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Some Funny Lapdance Going Wrong Video
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Some Girl Gets Busted Masturbating
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Every Little Girl’s Dream is to Be a Pornstar….
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ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS
Some Old Skinny Bitch Acting Sexy With a Big Discolored Dildo
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From Vagina Shots to Cum Play This Album is Porn on a Mainstream Site
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Some Naked Chicks a Guy Claims are His Ex Girlfriends
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Ass Lover’s Album
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Some Girl Flashing Her Tits
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Use this Spray to Get Laid
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