Nicolette Sheridan is a Jogger of the Day

Nicolette Sheridan is a 45 year old who proves that if you want to keep your edge and remain a sex object in film an television, you can’t get irresponsible and get married and have kids, becauase we all know that if she had kids, she wouldn’t look like this, since they ruin your fucking life just as much as they ruin your hot body.

Husbands everywhere have to come home to a tired slob of a wife who doesn’t put out anymore and who they are happy doesn’t put out anymore because their bodies are fucking disgusting since they let themselvs go, forcing them to hit the internet and jerk off to pictures of Nicolette Sheridan to find any satisfaction in life. You know sitting in their garage to avoid having to spend time with the slob they married, wondering how their life would be different if the hot 25 year old they sold their soul too was a little more self absorbed, vain and in love with themselves. You know if they said no to the second serving of ice cream during their post partum depression that prevented them from losing the pregnancy weight they gained and spent a little more time jogging….

I guess you can argue that her life is empty and that she will end up alone because she didn’t take the natural course of reproduction, but I am sure the only people saying that are moms, who have brainwashed themselves to thinking having babies is amazing, because it’s all they have going for them after sacrificing themselves to make it happen, and a harsh reality that if they did admit sucked, would make them feel like bad humans, so it’s better to stay delusional about, but I think that with all that money and the fact that every single straight guy in the world is willing to have sex with her, while every Gay dude who watches her shitty Desperate Housewives shit is willing to go straight for her and the fact that she can buy herself a baby who is already 16 when she’s really milked this whole sex symbol thing and has totally cashed out on her body, so that she doesn’t have to go through all the annoying steps of early childhood and can still pretend she’s a mom as it comes to visit her in the old folks home when she’s developed alzheimers because it will be outlined in its contract that it has no choice but to do that if it wants its inheritance….

I don’t really know what I am going off on, I get lost in my words sometimes, but what it comes down to is that watching Nicolette Sheridan jogging and keeping her old lady body fit is like porn to me, maybe because my 45 year old wife’s idea of exercise is eating a bag of chips, but probably because I want to fuck Nicolette Sheridan….

Nicolette Sheridan is a Jogger of the Day October 17th, 2008