I grew up jerking off to Christie Brinkley’s modeling pics, it was the 80s, I was a virile young man who hadn’t found the value in cheap hookers and together we had a pretty wholesome coming of age relationship. She was with me the first time I ever stuck anything in my ass to heighten orgasm, she was with me when I jerked off in the school bathroom, she was with me when I asphyxiated myself with my belt the first time, she was with me the first time I fucked an inanimate object and with me the for the first 20 or 30 times I fucked ugly chicks.
I remember staring to hate her when she married Billy Joel. I remember hating her more when she got pregnant with him and I remember being excited when I found it was a girl 13 years younger than me, thinking that by the time she was 18, we could maybe fuck. Then I forgot about the whole thing, I turned 16, I got my driver’s license, I got on with life and I couldn’t be bothered remember Brinkley or any other model or celebrity, I was too into living and by living I mean slowly killing myself.
When I came across these pictures of Alexa Ray Joel last night, I didn’t believe it. Christie Brinkley was a blonde goddess, not some hooked nose rat, I guess Billy’s seed is strong, or should I say Billy JEW’s seed is strong….
I was reminded of those years, the hope, the memories, the good times, but horribly faced with the reality that Alexa Ray Brinkley is no Christie. I guess it only makes sense since my life is filled with disappointment.
Here are her pics in some stupid outfit from the other day….
It turns out the as nepotism does, she’s a recording artist, because modeling wasn’t really an option an here is a boring perfomance video….I have no idea how a 20 year old would get into this kind of music…I am posting it because she’s disappoints me.
That said, I’d still fuck her, just to get a chance to accidentally walk in on her mom in the bathroom, or sleeping, or some shit. And I feel for her, because it must suck to live a life in your mother’s shadow. All she can do is blame Billy.