I hung out with Cindy Crawford once, you know in the 90s when she was at the top of her game and I was one of the biggest fashion photographers in the industry, we had a little falling out when I told her to spread that pussy wider, when she was trying to be wholesome and all American and totally against spread eagle pussy shots and she got me kicked out of the industry because she’s just that powerful and my life has been on a downward spiral ever since.
Sure, that story was a total lie, but what difference does it make, it’s the fucking internet, I did see Cindy Crawford a few months ago when she was promoting some shitty furniture line at some discount furniture store, and she was pretty fucking amazing looking, the kind of girl who I should have run up to with my point and shoot camera and ask to spread that pussy wider, only to get escorted out by security, but I didn’t.
I did go to some weird strip club this weekened, where some slow, older stripper in costume got naked and soaped herself on stage, seems a little ambitious for a whore who makes her money when she charges people to grab her tits, but I guess I appreciated the effort.
Here are those allure pics, they hit the internet yesterday, I was napping….