You know when you park outside the ice cream shop in the beginning of summer, on a hot summer day, before the hot teen girls head off to camp, and watch them eat their ice cream, slowly licking it and sucking it and watching it drip down their chin, you know playing that shit over and over in slow motion in your head for the next couple of days, or until you muster up the energy and courage to get back there to watch it all over again, because you’re scared they’ll catch onto your dirty little secret, well, seeing Kim Kardashian trying to be sexy with a lollipop almost ruins that for me. She is a fucking pig.