I hitched a ride to NYC with a group of idiots. I crashed on couches cuz I am poor. I defied all odds and border patrol, all to get the the VMAs that I only found out about when I got here.
I have no hook-ups and need you to tell your friends…so word gets around that the most useless blogger is ready to crash parties…
If you know people at Make a Wish Foundation, tell them your fat friend with AIDS is ready to redeem his gift. I don’t have AIDS but I do have the capacity to pretend I do….
If you have a cousin, a brother, an uncle a sister who once fucked someone who worked at MTVs cousin, brother, uncle or sister….hit them up for me..
Email me at info (at) drunkenstepfather.com
Make magic happen for me….even though I know no one is reading this and if they are, they are losers with no hook-ups and if they are hooked up, they aren’t helping me…
But I am desperate and it is worth it…
On a sidenote I saw Jared Leto and he looks real bisexual. He was with Shenae “I got a black name” Grimes….and she was ugly as fuck in person…
Next stop, Lohan’s vagina….