It’s Valentines Day, the holiest of holy days to get desperate lonely bitches on your dick…The day of opportunity….cuz girls who are single always feel like shit about being single and need a cock to remind them that everything is gonna be okay, unless you’re in a relationship, in which case here’s my list of last minute Valentine’s Day gifts to give that special lady of your life…
Top Valentines Day Gifts To Make Her Feel Special:
5-A gym membership letting her know you don’t want to fuck her cuz she’s fat and it grosses you out.
4-A romantic drive 3 hours away from civilization where you’ve pretended to set up a picnic, only to drive away as soon as she gets out of the car. This one’s called “Survival Skills”….
3-Herpes…It may not hit today…but when it does tell her what it’s for…HPV or HIV work too….
2- A Used Condom You Used on Someone Else Earlier that Day With a Note Saying You Wanted to Share The Best Valentines Day of Your Life with Her…She can’t be mad, you used a condom….
1- A Divorce/Breakup/ or a pregnant hooker to show her just how much you don’t want to stay with her or knock her up cuz Relationships are Dull, Demanding, but you fear being alone…cuz no one else will fuck you.
Just don’t cut the crotches out of your stepDAUGHTERS panties and tell her she’ll thank you later…I don’t know what I’m talking about, I’m sure it’s useless and strictly based on having a fat wife I hate. You should give the people you love a hug, spend money on them, because as lame as this shit is, or as bullshit Hallmark as it is, girls take it fucking seriously, and base your love on them on the shit you do today, so if you don’t deliver, expect to me the fucker alone masturbating with his tears next year….you gotta give a little to get a litt….True story…
Here are my stepLINKS….
Snooki Made Us a Valentine – Unfortunately – Cuz She’s Vile
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Get Yourself This for Valentines Day – After You Fuck Some Random Loneley Girls
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A Giant Round Up of Sluts at the Grammys to Start Things Off
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Christina Aguilera Fall On Her Ass At The Grammys and I’m Guessing It’s Cause She Was Drunk
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Because When Looking For a Slut, You Wanna Find Ones That Know How to Do Things Right
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Karissa and Kristina Shannon Get McTrashy
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The 10 Hottest Girls At The Grammys
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Rihanna’s Nipples Pop Up to Say Hey
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Asian Amateur Oils Herself Up (NSFW) – VIDEO
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25 Hottest Female Athletes Under 25
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Because These Are What I Call Valentines Day Gifts (NSFW)
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Katy Price Panty Peek Upskirt (NSFW)
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Kate Hudson Just Because
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Valentine’s Day With Chanel Iman
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Emma Watson Kinda Sort of But Not Really Upskirt
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Monkeys And Man Ass Will Always Make For a Good Viral Video – VIDEO
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Valentines Day Done Right (NSFW) – VIDEO
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Claire Fricke is One Hot Model
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slutty Pic Dump of the Day (NSFW)
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How Not to Give a Kid a Bath – VIDEO
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The Best Tombstones Ever, Because Death Doesn’t Have to Be Depressing
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Rosa Acosta Behind the Scenes
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Helena Bonham Carter Looks Half Way to Bangable When She Takes a Shower
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SNL Does an Amazing Job of Making Fun of Little Wayne and Eminem – VIDEO
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Hot Arab Babe With a Perfect Ass (NSFW) – VIDEO
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Emma and Devin Get Their Lesbian On
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Devon Lee – Milf Supreme Pornstar (NSFW)
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Sophia Bush is Looking Hot
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Carla and Bianca Get It On (NSFW) – VIDEO
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Holly Valance Has a Hot Body
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I Love a Leggy Strawberry Blonde Babe
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Erika Jayne is Trashy and I Like It
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Cute Teen on Web Cam With Big Titties (NSFW)
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Stacy Shey Wants to Be Your Valentine (NSFW)
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Russel Brand Speaking Gibberish For 4 Minutes is a Great Way to Waste Time – VIDEO
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BMX Group Fail – VIDEO
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Now THAT’S What I Call Fireworks – VIDEO
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Selena Gomez Blabs On About Justine Bieber, Looks Hot
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Jessica Alba is Looking Pretty Hot at the Baftas
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JoJo Levesque Looks Like a Black Haired, Trashier Version of Lohan, As If That’s Possible
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Jennifer Hawkins Some Bangable Aussie Chick In A Bikini
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Holy Fuck Ciara Is Totally Fuckable In This Dress
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Miley Cyrus Shows Off Her Tits In A See Through Dress
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A New Emma Watson Panty Upskirt
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JWoww’s Big Tits In A See Through Dress
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Jessica Simpson Has Given Up On Life
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