I was walking my dog and saw his vision in the shortest shorts jog by me….I thought to myself…what an amazing outfit to jog in….you hot fucking bitch who just made herself that much hotter…in spandex…She was running with her boyfriend and I figured I’d never see her again after cursing him for being able to fuck that ass…..20 minutes later I’m walking back, and the girl is lying on the sidewalk holding her knee….injured and the boyfriend probably ran for help…or something….I asked her if she was ok…debating whether there is in fact a god because opportunities like this don’t happen ever….she said she was and I kept walking…only to never see her again…cuz I fail often…even in love…with girls in short shorts…
I should have told her “I’m trained in CPR, and mouth to mouthed her”….or used her inability to stand to carry her to safety….I use the word safety loosely….cuz you never look a gift horse in the mouth….you fuck it…
Either way lost love or not…here are he morning links…
The Best Steeplechase Fail EVER – VIDE0
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Lindsey Vonn Shows off Handstand, Bikini Body on Vacation
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Free Cam Shows Will Make Your Wednesday Better
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Today Will Improve Thanks To whatever is Between This Reporters Legs
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Jessyca is the Stuff Dreams Are Made Of
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Open Sewer Hole. Whoops – VIDEO
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Mena Suvari’s Ex-Husband Wants Spousal Support
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Girlfriend Plays With Her Friends Pussy
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This Tech-Obsessed Generation is Leading to Kids Eating Batteries. Oh Good.
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