By now you probably know that Angelina Jolie had a double Mastectomy to avoid getting breast cancer, because apparently breast cancer is what her mom died of, because breast cancer is a fucking asshole taking down women everywhere via their amazing tits….
As a woman and breast lover, it is something I consider terrorism and instead of spending billions blowing up arabs over oil, we should figure real problems, like breast cancer out. You know stop feeding women shit that causes cancer….
Now Angelina, although not a big deal the last few years, build a career on showing her amazing breasts, breasts I am sure we’ve all masturbated to at least once, and some of us may not understand her preemptive move to avoid getting breast cancer before she had breast cancer, but it makes sense to me….no one wants to die of shit they saw their mom die of.
What also makes sense is celebrating the nipples that were, because let’s face it, she’s in her 40s, the glory days are behind her, and the nipples that were would still be the nipples that were had she not had the mastectomy or not, but either way, it feels like a death in the family, because here tits were something I counted on….
Fuck you breast cancer for taking so much away from us that we love….from our moms, friends, to tits everywhere. You fucking cunt of a disease.
Thank you Anglina Jolie for giving us more years to watch you age….you’re very considerate…even if there was a major sacrifice made in the process