I decided to use my what I learned on facebook about penis size as my opening line at the bar last night, because I know any girls I approach saw the article, since facebook determines everything the world sees…you know establishing common ground….only to destroy it by asking her to measure my dick with my mouth…
So the lesson of the day, my moment of inspiration, is if you get a girl talking about dicks, and your dick specifically, swag it up or get her more drunk…don’t ask her to measure your dick with your mouth….
I test these things for you, since I am married and shouldn’t be fucking other girls….so I just troll them instead…
Here’s some TINDER romance, because I am romantic…
Here are some morning links….even though it is noon….
The Girl Who Faked Going to the Oscars is Amazing
GO
Underboob!
GO
Lara Stone Divorce…Obviously…
GO
Rita ORa GoT Titties
GO
I Feel Like Dildo Cam is Not a New Thing…But It’s Getting Press
GO
Seinfeld Actor I Don’t Remember is Dead
GO
Dog Gets Owned
GO
Bill Cosby Smears Oatmeal on Bitches Faces…Cuz He’s a Kids TV Host and Oatmeal is Healthy
GO
Pool Trick Shots
GO
Leonardo DiCaprio’s Palm Springs House is For Rent
GO
Karma After Taunting a Dog
GO
Ellen Stayed Relevant By Finding the Dress People Who Broke the Internet Last Week
GO
Milk Filled Tits…
GO