Last night at some shitty dive bar – I was chatting up some 50 year old married looking woaman with facial hair, as I do with my low standards, you know since I’m so approachable and charming, like a serial killer with less care for my personal appearance and hygiene …and after having an extensive conversation about her entire sex life – I asked her if she wanted to go bang hookers together…when she said yes, because she’s adventurous and her married life is boring, I told her we could use her dick not mine…
Needless to say, no hookers were fucked with any dicks…and my new friend…no longer a friend…but I did it for the punchline – that wasn’t even funny….
Here are some smorning links…in the smorning….
Hot girls in Sports Bras
CLICK HERE
Christoph Waltz fos Some Samsung Ad
CLICK HERE
The Scary Lucy Statue is Hilarious
CLICK HERE
Courtney Stodden Head Shaver
CLICK HERE
Amy Schumer is on All Three Fox Animated Shows
CLICK HERE
Gwyneth Paltrow Big Tits
CLICK HERE
How Dirty are Festival Wristbands
CLICK HERE
British Car Takes Out Camera Tower
CLICK HERE
The Evil King of Crocs Gives the Finger
CLICK HERE
It’s Britney’s Nipple
CLICK HERE
Girls you can’t See Clearly
CLICK HERE
How Coffee Got Quicker
CLICK HERE
Suicide Squad is a Piece of Shit – But Made Lots of Money
CLICK HERE