Sarah Hyland’s husband is the gayest motherfucker around….If that’s not some diddled dude in a boyband in 1998 getting shit on by a midget who has a giant fucking head I don’t know what he is….or maybe he’s some Puerto Rican twink that has sold his asshole to some old rich gay dude from the City, you know carted around like eye candy, either way…he freaks me the fuck out….but not as much as Sarah Hyland.
The funny thing is that I know their backstory, she’s Disney owned thanks to ABC, he was on Bachelor for ABC, they were linked up, and I guess he figured people are gay for pay, might as well be straight for pay…when you can find some kidney donor rich bitch with a limited life expectancy thanks to her kidney disease…which could be why she’s shitting on him….you know Kidney Failure, Kidney transplants, can add unnecessary pressure to her asshole….like she probably adds unnecessary pressure to his asshole…you know cuz he’s a queer.
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