Salma Hayek may be 300 years old, but thanks to some Mayan ritual in her native of Mexico with Harvey Weinstein, that may or may not have involved some sort of Human Sacrifice to the demons who decide what a celebrity career in the USA looks like, which I guess involves big ol’ titties…she still looks pretty fucking hot.
I’ve heard she was rich in Mexico, which allowed her to become richer in America, and now the richest in Europe because her husband and baby daddy is some billionaire…
That ‘some’ billionaire, is coincidentally the owner of Gucci, so you’ll know why she’s in this new silly Gucci movie staring a bunch of American people, putting on fake Italian accents, that have been rumored to sound Russian, because “Italian-Face” or “Italian Cultural Appropriation”….doesn’t really get the haters of the internet mad…they just like Gaga, Hayek, Leto and the other people in it….and can’t cancel those demons.
Anyway, old as shit or not, I am a fan of Hayek, she’s an icon and so are her very expensive tits, that we’ll assume weren’t touched inappropriately by Weinstein, you know because I am sure he didn’t fuck ALL of them….but MAYBE he did…
Fascinating stuff…
JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!