Fake tits are retarded and I don’t understand the psychology behind getting that shit, but they seem to be pretty fucking popular amongst girls who like asshole muscle dudes in Ed Hardy t-shirts with frosted spiked hair.

They also seem to be popular with girls who like to flaunt that shit like they were born with big tits and the fuckers are something special that not just anybody could have if they had the money or interest. It’s like when my asshole friend shows off his flat screen TV to me and tells me how fucking awesome it is, like he’s living the fuckin’ dream, meanwhile the fucking thing cost him 600 dollars, and that’s not that much fuckin’ money, making his dream pretty fucking attainable for the average fuckin’ man.

None of that really matters because I’ve been talking about fake tits way too fuckin’ much the last couple of days, it’s like I’ve been dreaming, breathing and eating the fuckers or something and I can only blame the AVN awards I didn’t attend for tainting me with images of porn sluts and dreams of fuckin’ pornstars because they pretty much fuck anything.

Here’s some Janice Dickinson bikini pictures because being old, haggard and leather skinned may not allow her to model anymore, but shit is encouraged in the porn industry so all she’s gotta do is shift things out a little and by shift things out I mean take some cock up in her on camera…..she’s already got all the moves down because she’s had so much plastic surgery, bitch moves like she’s made of rubber, so we’re halfway there and that’s more than I can say for myself about pretty much anything except maybe being a faillure, but i like the think I’ve done that right and I’m fully there.

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