I have a thing for Sophie Monk because I find her pretty fucking hot and because she’s got pretty horrible taste in dudes meaning that if only I was a rich, tattooed cunt in a band who girls find hot, I’d be climbing up those thighs and dropping loads in her Koala pouch because she is Australia and I’m no Steve Irwin because apparently Kangaroos have pouches and Koalas don’t. I never said this was the nature channel, except when I posted the Kardashian sex tape, but that’s just mild racism for a couple laughs and not actual fact.

Either way, the word on the internet is that she is recently single and based on her going out and jogging, I can only assume that is true, because everyone knows that a bitch lookin’ for cock goes out jogging in spandex to be seen, while a chick who’s committed to cock and planning on marrying that cock, just works out at home on the treadmill, before actually marrying him then giving up the whole working out thing, gaining 60 pounds making him regret what he signed up for and forcing him to cheat on her with her younger tighter sister and pretty much any vagina that comes his way until she finds out she just keeps on emotionally eating the pain away before mustering up the courage to divorce him for being doing what he did, even though she knows it’s his fault, then taking up working out again to get back into her original hot body shape to find more cock because that’s the best revenge. Look what you’re missing now Good Charlotte Twin….

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