Don’t bother emailing me asking why the fuck I am posting this, not that you will, because I don’t really get emails, but it feels better to pretend people care enough to send in messages of encouragement or hate, but we all know that I am too irrelevant than that, so I’ll just stick to sending myself emails from various email addresses I’ve set up, and reading my SPAM because those people will always be there for me, and in fact are offering me 30 million dollars because they are the son of a Prince as well as penis enlargement medication, because they really understand my needs, and we all know that’s more than you’ve ever done for me.

Speaking of SPAM, Selma Blair, Hollywood’s own version of SPAM landed her very own role in a TV show, because I guess the persistant emails and phonecalls to producers was bound to annoy one of them enough to give her work, because that’s the only justification I can think of for her being on set dressed like a colorful streetwhore, but I figured it’s worth drawing attention to because it’s a motivational poster to all of you, that pretty much anyone can make it when they don’t have a gag reflex. Thanks Selma.

Posted in:Selma Blair|Shorts