I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2012

12

Mar

Jennifer Love Titties of the Day

Jennifer Love Hewitt is the spokesperson for Eharmony – which is kinda funny considering she can’t keep a man and she would be desperate enough to turn to the internet to find love….even though she’s a snobby cunt and apparently not responding too well to the men Eharmony have been choosing for her…cuz she thinks she is better than them and that she deserves the best, probably another actor, even though male actors are pussies…and she’s not that hot…and no spring chicken…it’s just a spoiled cunt state of mind…that’s hard to beat out of her…..

I have always said meeting someone off the internet is sketchy as fuck and I had never done it until recently…see, the internet is filled with weirdo trash and it is better to meet random girls in the park or even homeless pussy or street kid pussy…cuz they are usually more mentally stable than internet chicks…

But some times you go against your better judgement when feeling alone, bored, or whatever and you make the mistake of meeting groupie girls off the internet cuz it feeds your ego…..ones who had your site bookmarked since 2005….the kind of girl you know can’t be normal if she read this shit for 7 years….but pretend she is because you want her to be….

The kind of girl who conveniently lived in my neighborhood…..who was conveniently engaged so it would never get too serious and who conveniently invited me to meet her over and over again….to which I said no over and over again…cuz I don’t fuck with internet chicks…..mainly cuz I usually assume there’s a van waiting for me at the meeting spot with guys with baseball bats…..

So she found a mutual friend and got my number…at which point I shoulda run and hid like a paranoid freak I am…cuz that’s weird behavior….especially from an internet freak…..but instead I go along with it and agree to meet her….

That led to the last 3 months fucking her on the regular as she lied to her fiance…and to me….on some fatal attraction kick….professing her love for me, trying to marry me, trying to move in with me and my wife and other unstable crazy shit….

The whole time I fear being stabbed or murdereed by her in my sleep…not by him, cuz he’s obviously a pussy who lets his chick have relationships with other dudes…..but by her, cuz internet girls aren’t normal…especially when fans of this site….but the unprotected anal made me forget the level of internet loser I was hanging with.

Luckily, she disappeared a couple of weeks ago….it could have ended a lot worse for me….cuz I went to a place I hate….with an unstable internet girl who will just become just a distant memory to me, unless she gave me AIDS, then I’ll have to think of her as much as her fiance will think of me everytime he sticks his dick in her…cuz let’s face it, when you give trash a ring, you obviously don’t think it is trash, and you sure as hell don’t think that trash is getting stuffed by strangers off the internet behind your back to the point where she’s decided to have a relationship with the person, but when you find out, cuz you always find out….shit gets messy…..but not as messy as her pussy after I came all over it.

And that’s why I don’t fuck with girls from the internet…and why I will listen to my instincts next time…and here’s Jennifer Love Tits….


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3 Responses

  1. Anonymous says:

    I rate JLH as a top 10 on my all-time sexual fantasy bucket
    list but I think she has Jennifer Aniston disease but with a twist.  I would walk over hot coals to get in that luscious
    body(an she likes it in the ass) but I would run like heck before marrying
    time.  I would run from Aniston because
    nobody marries the girl that everyone slept with and JLH because she is a fat
    woman waiting to happen.  She is a
    marriage and a baby away from being Orca at Sea World.   

  2. hansel says:

    cool story bro

  3. MadamMeow says:

    I met my boyfriend on a message board.  He will agree with you that has an internet chick that I’m crazy as fuck, but I give good head so he puts up with it.

    Internet chicks are sluts, even if they will cut off your nuts while you sleep, but sluts make the world go ’round, and that’s what this world needs. =)

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