I have a thing for Sophie Monk. She’s a tall blonde chick with a hot body and interesting lookin’ face and I am convinced she’s one of the hottest things out there. The only drawback is that she’s dating a gay dude, and as much as I turn to the gays to serve me coffee at Starbucks, or randomly give me uninvited advice about how I should dress when on the street, I get kinda thrown off when I find out they’re fucking girls I want to fuck.

Gay is trendy and every girl wants a gay, it’s like a fashion accessory every girl needs to have. What they don’t realize is that gay is a con being pulled on them because this whole gay thing gets pussy. First, by winning a girl’s trust so that they get naked or half naked in front of dude. Then by opening up and getting the girls to tell them about how they like to fuck and about their ex-bf’s cocks and all this shit that straight dudes are privileged enough to hook up, because they think straight dudes are predators and don’t realize that gays are too, they are just more smooth about things, until one night when they’ve both had too much to drink and feel experimental and the girl jumps on that gay dick as fast as she can, because she feels that she had the power to convert a motherfucker and that makes her feel good about herself.

Either way, I would still eat her shit, like we were in 2 Girls 1 Cup, even if shit tasted like Joel Madden’s cum, because he only slams her in the ass, it’s less “hetero” that way and lets him reflect on the years he shared a room with his brother when they were young, horny and experimental, while crying about how things will never be the same again….

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