I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2006

28

Dec

I am – Paris Hilton's Bikini Shower in Australia of the Day

paris-australiaTOP.jpg

Paris Hilton and her soon to be released sex tape Kim Kardashian the Monkey Lover because She’s Fat are rocking out in Australia for New Years. Everyone has a fucking sex tape and I love it. Anyone under the age of 22 has been raised on hardcore porn and come from broken homes at least that’s the way I see it when I hear stories about 12 year old girls going to clubs in their highschool uniforms, ripping lines in the bathroom, dancing on the bar showing the world their ass then ending up at the after party where they suck some random dude’s dick. Or when I hear about highschool threesomes where girls are sitting on each other’s faces for some 15 year old jerking off in the corner, or when I hear that Anal sex is more popular to the younger generation because they can’t get pregnant. I guess this is the shit that movie Thirteen was based on and I love every fucking second of it. When I was 16 my girlfriend wouldn’t even take it up the ass after 3 years of being together and she was born pre-mature with subtle retardation…now asshole virginity is not a sacred thing. I may not be able to benefit from it, but at least I get to watch the videos. It’s a Christmas fucking miracle.

I went out to a bar last night to drink my happiness about this finding away and got drunk enough to text message Stavros asking him what he was doing for NYE.

He wrote me this

I’m in Australia dude, can’t believe I’m here. What are you up to?

I figure he had no idea who I was so I asked him to sponsor my website and asked if Paris was there since they are engaged. He never answered and it broke my heart. I can only assume my number is now blocked and dead to him, l like his immune system since Paris gave him AIDS.

Here are the Paris pics.


Here’s your bonus picture – it’s Paris and the Armenian Kim Jungle Fever Doing the Charlie’s Angel pose because they are fucking lame. You probably don’t find it lame because you and your friends do this pose all the time because you are a generic piece of shit and that’s why I hate you. Cuddles.

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