I have this new pickup line for you virgins to try. Go to a club and tell the girl you are trying to sleep with about how awkward you feel being there. When she asks why, tell her that you’ve banged every single girl in the place and they are acting like they don’t know you. She’ll totally fall for it and think that you are amazing in bed because a guy like you can’t get pussy on your looks alone, you must have some real talent. The whole other issue is that girls love UGG boots, they wear these fucking things from no matter what walk of life they are walkin, they don’t care if they go to a party and every girl is in UGGS, if anything it makes them feel like they made the right choice. I am just telling you to be the next UGGS, but instead of keeping their feet warm, you’ll make the hate themselves for letting a guy like you in their junk…

I once knew a guy who banged hundreds of chicks, and he’d always ask girls to be whatever number he was onto, he’d be like “baby, you wanna be number 156” and it would work. Girls didn’t think Herpes when they got with him, they thought, “OMG 155 girls are onto this and I’m not, fuck that noise, I’m trendy too” and in return he’d give them HERPES but they’d only find out 6-8 weeks down the line….

Posted in:Laura Prepon|Unsorted