I am - Natalie Reid the Paris Hilton Impersonator's Tits of the Day

2007

Jul

I am – Natalie Reid the Paris Hilton Impersonator’s Tits of the Day

This is some creepy fucking shit. Paris Hilton has some crazy look-alike who is now attending events and making a name for herself as the bitch who looks like Paris Hilton. Her name is Natalie Reid and the whole thing makes me feel uncomfortable, even though she’s showin’ off a little tit.

This girl wakes up every morning thinking to hersel about how she can be more like Paris, she gets her hair done to look like Paris, she watches video and interviews to talk like Paris, she has probably got plastic surgery to look more like Paris and if Paris wasn’t famous, this would probably be illegal.

To put things in perspective, imagine someone you know, like a neighbor or someone you work with you a friend decides to make themselves look like you. They start off small like getting the same haircut, then they start wearing the same clothes and as time goes on they look almost like your twin brother. You would freak the fuck out, possibly call the cops, get a restraining order or beat the motherfucker up.

In an unrelated story, I was walking by the Salvation Army depot yesterday night and saw some dude with a stick fishing for clothes out of the drop off bins they have set up. I thought to myself that motherfucker was crafty because he was eliminating the middle man and getting shit people drop off for free, before the Salvation Army gets their money grubbing hands on this free shit to start selling it to turn a huge profit. I thought to myself that I wanted to be like that guy because he was smart, enterprising and well dressed, but was too lazy to go through with it, because getting my leg amputated, a wheelchair and losing about 70 lbs is a lot more effort than I wanted to put into things. I decided to just ride out these jogging pants til they either melt or become fused to my skin and that’s all I have to say about that because I figure that trying to figure out why anyone would want to look like Paris Hilton would really be impossible to do and I am not ambitious enough to take on the impossible.