Ronnie Wood and His Mail Order Teenage Hipster Bride of the Day

2009

Jan

Ronnie Wood and His Mail Order Teenage Hipster Bride of the Day

I just spent way too much time uploading all these pictures of Rolling Stone Ronnie Wood and some 18 year old lookin’ Russian girl that is being said to be his girlfriend.

I have no idea why I bothered, because they aren’t having sex and she’s not naked and masturbating, or even slippin’ up nipple, or flashing panty. I guess it has to do with how funny I find seeing a 60 year old dressed like a 20 year old hipster you’d find at your local record store, you know in his skinny jeans and fat sneakers and flannel shirt, I mean dude’s probably considered a musical legend and has every right to dress however the fuck he wants, but it still makes me laugh, because old people aren’t supposed to dress like 20 year old Poli Sci students, it’s like the time I met a dude with that Infantism fetish, where dude got all dressed up in diapers and bonnets and sat in a adult size playpen soiling himself, only to be cleaned up by his lover, before using his rattle on her cunt while breast feeding.

The other thing I find funny is his teenage Russian hipster girlfriend. Where would a rockstar meet some teenage Russian hipster girlfriend? A catalog, maybe a website, ebay or even craiglist? I mean shit just doesn’t make sense, because if I was a rockstar, I’d be slamming models, pornstars and hot chicks, I’d leave the dumpy assed immigrants in American Apparel for the dudes in local indy bands and DJs, because she’s just not hot, no matter how tight her body is compared to the other bitches in his old folk’s home. Bad joke. Sure. I’ll give you that much, but I won’t give you my freedom. I don’t know what that means.