Here is some shit going on in the news, cuz it’s never too late to realize or accept that we are all doomed….

Man wants to legally change name to Boomer the Dog

Gary Matthews, a PA man petitioned the court to change his name to Boomer the Dog and even dresses up as a dog when walking around his neighborhood

Orgasm Ride

Girl Gets Really Turned On By An Amusement Park

Phila. Woman Claims Donald Duck Groped Her

The web site Smoking Gun has obtained a civil suit that claims a Philadelphia-area woman was groped by Donald Duck at Walt Disney World.

Marinated Cat Rescued at Traffic Stop

A Buffalo, NY man was pulled over by police who found a cat marinating in his trunk as the man planned on eating the cat

Parents Arrested for Buying Son Sex Toy, Sending Him Porn in PA

5 adults were charged with giving porn to an 11 year-old

Baltimore Man in Jail for Faking Seizures to Get Out of Paying for Restaurant Bills

Andrew Palmer was sentenced to 18 months for faking seizures to skip out on restaurant bills

Son Learns of Mom’s Porno Past at State Fair

A woman was shocked to discover that her second grade son came home with provocative photos after he went to the local fair

OH Man Caught Sneaking in Homes to Cuddle with Women

Michael Philips told police he was a ninja when caught breaking into apartments to cuddle with women while they slept.

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