Being the kind of guy who can get off to Kelly Osbourne makes you weird….you know with all the fatness that was never worth masturbating to even when it got skinny unless you’re an Ozzy fan and want some of the product of his sperm that stuck to uterus…

Being the kind of guy who can get off to people at funerals makes you even weirder….you know with all the sadness and mourning death and celebrating life morbid shit…

But being the kind of guy who can get off to Kelly Osbourne at a funeral makess you the weirdest….it’s up there with necrophilia…she’s the kind of girl that if you were forced to choose whether to fuck her or the corpse being mourned, you’d likely choose the corpse cuz it would likely be more pleasurable…and less traumatic….

I love having these useless conversations with myself…I don’t love this post…it is fucking depressing me….cuz I’ve had good friends die of drug overdoses, and the shit is fucked, you can’t make a person stop doing drugs, and getting that call is always horrible….even though you know it’s coming….so I’m not all bad…as unattractive as I find Klly Osbourne…I can relate to what she’s going through…see girls…I’ve got a soul…not as much as Amy Winehouse’s music that I was a huge fan of but you should still let me eat you out…

Posted in:Kelly Osbourne