I love this story….it reminds me of why I don’t like flying…partially cuz I have no self control and do stupid shit that will get me shot by air marshals when drunk but also because people are so fucking uptight…and don’t like it when you do stupid shit like get drunk and piss on their kids instead of using the bathroom…cuz sometimes that’s what happens when you’re drunk…

The 83 year old with implants is good too….so here’s the stepNEWS….

Drunk Man Pees on a Sleeping Girl During a Jet Blue Flight of the Day

Chaos erupted on JetBlue’s red-eye flight from Portland, Ore., to JFK yesterday when a drunk allegedly urinated on a sleeping 11-year-old girl.

The youngster was traveling with her sister and dad, and had been left alone for a few minutes while the others used the lavatories.

Robert Vietze, 18, of South Warren Vt., stumbled from his seat five rows behind her and emptied his bladder, a witness said.

“I was drunk, and I did not realize I was pissing on her leg,” the 6-foot-4, 195-pound Vietze said, according to law-enforcement sources. He later claimed to have consumed eight alcoholic beverages.

The girl’s father caught Vietze midstream.
“I woke up to this man yelling and literally looking like he was about to punch this kid in the face,” said the witness, who asked not to be identified.

“The father was screaming, ‘F – – k that kid! I don’t want him near my family!’ ” the passenger said.

Flight attendants separated the pair and removed Vietze to the back of the plane. They attempted to clean up the mess with liquid soap from the bathrooms, and helped to comfort the traumatized girl.

But the 5½-hour flight from hell was not over yet.
Roughly an hour before the plane landed, another passenger began to complain of chest pains, then vomited.

“Is anybody on this flight a nurse or a doctor?” the pilot said over the public-address system. “We have a medical emergency.”

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