Cindy Crawford is a fucking dream. I know I am supposed to be disgusted by old ladies, but this one, this one’s special and not even because I used to jerk off to her in the 90s when she was supermodeling, but because I crossed paths with her once, and her “it factor”…the same “it factor” that made her a celebrity in the first place…pretty much melted my soul.

I guess some people just have an energy, or what it takes to win the people around them over, and some people, like supermodels, no how to make love with their eyes, and pretty much ruin anything in a 10 block radius.

Seriously, after the day I crossed paths with her, I’ve never been the same, no girl has been close to this greatness, and all the bitches I fucked, despite having no standards, were that much more unappealing.

I am a fan of this shoot for the latest issue of MUSE…but more importantly, I am a fan of ejaculating on printouts of it…because that’s as close as I’ll get to this loveliness.

Posted in:Cindy Crawford