Kellie Pickler is the American Idol hick, that I have a feeling wasn’t actually a hick, but rather someone they pulled out of some diner in the middle of no where and mind fucked the world with to make Simon Cowell a lot of money. You know using TV to manipulate the world into giving him money, like some kind of TV Evagelist, only instead of Jesus and God, motherfucker uses shitty fucking songs.

That said, my favorite thing I remember about her was her tribute to her grandpappy from whatever backwoods Appalachian mountain shanty he used to have sex with her in…his coal covered hands all over her budding young breasts…

Breasts she had augmented the second she got famous…because I guess her priorities were in the right place…some people go on a vacation with their first million, or buy a house, this girl got tits…

Tits she’s put in a bikini…for the internet….

Posted in:Kellie Pickler