I am not a psychologist, and I really don’t even know anything about Michelle Rodriguez, other than I thought she was a lesbian with Cara Delevingne, something that could have just been for publicity, all acting in love and inseparable, until being separated…. what the fuck do I know, I don’t leave my house or know these people…and then she wasn’t a lesbian…because she was on a boat with Zac Effron, who I assume was gay, because he’s gotta be gay…which I guess means they are fucking, because when people are on boats together, especially massive yachts with 20 other people, they are always fucking…

And now she’s just taking in being watched on instagram by doing all kinds of crazy…like riding the baggage carousel at the airport…posting quotes like “I no longer have the energy for meaningless friendships, forced interactions, or unnecessary conversations”…we call that being broken up after realizing she’s been used…and a little parkour because the one thing I do know about Michelle Rodriguez, one thing for sure, it’s that she’s very ape-like…

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