The easter egg hunt in a hooker’s womb DID not happen this passed weekend.

I can’t afford that kind of shit….

And really anytime you hire a hooker, it is a bit of an easter egg hunt, since you never know what kind of AIDS you’re going to get…

Will it be designer Hollywood AIDS like Charlie Sheen or Magic Johnson, or will it be Key West in the 80s AIDS…or will it just be some kind of rash…..

So no religious experiences were had over the holiest of weekends…No chocolate bunny was inserted in any vaginas in my general location…and I did not convince my wife…MY OWN FUCKING wife to sit on a ham because I know it would fit…despite my convincing argument of “You’re three hundred pounds and you’ve had a few kids with other men like the whore that you are, your vagina is the biggest gnarliest thing around, I call it the evil forest, PLUG I’ve had my whole fucking arm up in you…a ham is only slightly wider…plus who doesn’t like the full stretched out feeling”…

I’m working on my Pitch for NEXT year assuming she doesn’t die from her obesity, since she never seems to die from her obesity, who are these people dying from obesity when all these obese people seem just fine on their WALMART scooters….

Seriously…..

Some morning links – SURE.

Posted in:stepLINKS