So the Super Bowl happened…and apparently old man Brady and his gang of annoying idiots who have won at life managed to destroy in a “fuck you I’m not too old for this, but I am the greatest of all time” kind of way…clearly he sucked all the testosterone out of Gisele’s Brazilian tranny dick to give him the super powers needed to be the greatest of all time…I mean his 30 million dollar a year contract that is probably one a portion of what he makes in a year relies on it…and the whole pro sports thing is a reminder of how the only thing any parents out there should be doing is taking their fat lazy kids off their fat lazy asses and stage parenting them into athletics, the original influencing, since dudes are closet cases who like watching men play with balls….but that makes it clearly the best life you can possibly have…fit, healthy, surrounded by money and models, working a few months a year, and the rest of the time you just need to stay fit, to not be a pro athlete is to not fully live…as I get out of breath just typing this..as I sweat out my hangover…it’s a workout to some..I mean there’s clearly strain on my heart as it struggles to keep me in the seated position! I guess that makes me a pro athlete in my own right too…my sport is sex jokes no one understands….TOUCHDOWN.

Here are some morning links..

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